Sequel: Collide ›
Her Monologue
O N E.
“Hey Jesse, who’s this a picture of?” I turned my head towards my best friend Mia narrowing my eyes I stared at the old Polaroid picture in her hands. “I believe that is my mother and father on their first date way back in the 80’s.” I replied and continued to pack things up to move to storage. “Oh, you never have told me the full story about what happened to them. Are you ever going to tell me?” I looked over at her and smiled plainly, “Are you sure you want that? It’s not a happy story and it makes me seem like I’d be the type of kid to walk into a school and shoot up the place.” Mia’s eyes widened at my words I nodded my head slowly. “I still want to hear it Jess.” She said setting a box marked pictures down on the table I inhaled deeply.
“Okay fine.” I said and patted the seat next to me on the couch, “Come here then,” I said goofily and cracked my knuckles. “My mom Annabelle was 15 when she met my father Mark Jr. They dated on and off through high school he had a horrible temper when it came to men looking at my mother or my mother talking to other men even way back then. They broke up sophomore year and didn’t talk to each other again until senior year.” I cleared the lump that began to form in my throat it sucked talking about these two in such detail it made my skin crawl but Mia wanted the story so she was going to get the whole story. “Right after graduation my parents were married because, my mother became pregnant with my brother Joey. My mother lived in her own personal hell until she became pregnant with me in winter of 1989,” I said and looked at Mia to watch her face and make sure she was still with me.
“I was born on May 7th 1990, my mom always said that I was the quietest baby ever because I didn’t cry or fuss I enjoyed being alone.” I narrowed my eyes when I heard the slight whisper of Mia saying something along the lines of ‘that sure sounds like you’. “Anyways, my brother told me that from the age of 3 to the age of 9 my father abused my mother in front of him and would scream at him for no reason at all, he said it stopped for a few months when I was born but when I turned 8 months it started up again. I guess he was waiting for my mom to heal enough to start abusing her again.” I bit down on my bottom lip looking at her. “He put her in the hospital because he ran over her on a motorcycle luckily he only broke her arm, she had endured his torture on her for many years my brother turned 10 and I was a year and 6 months old when he got so bad. He’d go to work and then when he got home all he would do was poke at my mom and call her names hit her.” I said and rubbed my arm to pat at the hives that began to form on my arms. “November 15th, I was in my bed when my dad walked in the room because I was whining a little too loud.” I looked at Mia there was a look of pure horror on her face.
“He tried to suffocate me with a pillow, my mom stopped him and locked my brother and I in the closet.” I said coldly, “Next thing I knew I was thrown away like my brother we were given to my aunt, then my grandma, then my uncle, then my father’s mother, then my father’s sister, and then the state.” I said softly and looked at her, “My mother is serving life in prison with no chance of parole,” I said looking at her patting her leg, “That the story you wanted to hear?”
“We-“ She started to say then closed her mouth just sitting there, “Hey don’t be shocked I turned out great, my brother died when he was 15 of a drug overdose and I went to school and college and Now I’m here packing up my childhood home with you so I can sell it and get out of this crappy little town.” I said smiling a little looking at her, “I don’t dwell on my past Mia,” She nodded her head at me and rubbed her neck looking down as she spoke quietly, “I just can’t imagine what you’re feeling inside.” I stood up quickly and looked at her, “I am not one of your psych patients Mia,” I smiled at her and rubbed my neck, “I’m a boring old school teacher with no job right now and soon to be no home but a pocket full of money and a car that runs really good.” I laughed softly and threw the box marked photos in the trash can, “No memories in this box are good ones, trust me I got all the pictures I could ever want from this town already in my car.”
“So, what about the other incident?” Mia asked after we had gotten through a few more packed boxes, “You just want to know my whole life story don’t you Mia?” I chuckled and shrugged, “I was 16 I went to a party got drugged, raped, knocked up, I gave the baby to my Aunt as she can’t have kids and two years later on my 18th birthday I got a link to a website of pictures from my rape party.” I shrugged looking at Mia who rubbed her neck, “Are you a jinx or something?” I blinked a little and thought about that question for a few moments, “I could be, but then again…” I paused and looked at a little glass doll, “Who isn’t a jinx?” Mia blinked rubbing her head she looked clearly confused as she thought about that for the longest time.
“Jess, that makes no sense.” I laughed out loudly and bounced looking over at her, “That’s the point!” I exclaimed as I threw a breakable knickknack into the box breaking it, I shrugged, “One less thing for storage.” I hummed and looked at her with an amused smile, “Are you bipolar?” She asked me seriously I made a silly face, “I’m highly medicated for that my love I am not bipolar I’m just a little crazy.” Mia’s eyes widened so much I thought her eyes would pop right out of her head before she laughed it off. That was the brilliance of our relationship we were both crazy and we both knew it. It wasn’t a medical crazy or something you should be afraid of it was a joking type of crazy that everyone had in them at times. Mia and Jesse just expressed it more often than not.
“So, you never told m-“ I cut her off by holding my hand up I looked at her seriously, “No more life stories, I’m going all story teller over here.” I said laughing softly when she finished her sentence anyways, “Me where on earth you’re planning on leaving and if you were going to come back or keep in touch with your best friend since middle school.” She said putting her hand on her hip. I looked at her and smiled softly, “I don’t know where on earth I am heading or how long I will be there. I will keep in touch with you and I will only come back for important things.” I said as I pushed another box into the pile sitting down on the floor “The movers are going to love you, I mean you’ve pretty much broken everything that was fragile,” Mia said as she picked up a box that made this chime like sound with all the broken glass pieces hitting each other.
“Yeah well if you had the memories of this house like I did, you wouldn’t give two fucks about a single damn thing in this house. All you would care about is getting the fuck out just like me.” I said to her as I poked her nose lightly and walked towards the back room with a slow cautious movement. Flashbacks hit me all the time of this house none of them pleasant. I pushed the door to my parent’s room over and the stale smell of Cigarettes and my mother’s perfume bellowed out of the room. It still looked the same I glanced from one side of the room to the other his things were still here and so were hers, I had never been in this room but once when the police came to get my mother and my brother and I crawled out of my closet and went into the room. I sat down slowly on the bed looking at the busted mirror and the bottles of old perfume laying on the floor. This was their legacy all that was left of them and I wanted to destroy the scene and pack it all away for nobody to ever see again.
I inhaled deeply as I stood from the bed I ripped the sheets off the bed the dust built up on them flew everywhere I watched the sheets float down onto a pile on the floor. I didn’t know why it was so unsettling to be doing this, I grabbed a box out of the hallway and started shoveling things into the box. Clock, perfume, hair brushes, makeup, jewelry, old mail, clothes. One by one boxes were stacked into the hallway as I cleaned out the last bedroom of the house that would need to be cleaned, I looked back and drug the vanity out of the room leaving everything of my fathers in the room. I put a white paper on the door that said ‘Do Not Enter’ on it and closed the door.
I wiped my hands off and saw that the front of the house was empty I flopped onto the couch next to Mia. “Thank you.” I said softly looking at her with a small smile, “Thank you for what?” She questioned looking up from her phone to me. “Thank you for helping me pack this place up, it’s all going into a storage garage in Stockton, California.” I said giving her the address, “My mom is in jail there so, I figured I’d leave the crap in the area in case she tries to appeal the judge and get out of prison.” I said softly and smiled a little throwing my bag over my shoulders, “Lock up when you want,” I said walking out to my car there was two boxes in the back seat of my car. Well, I guess this is growing up, I thought to myself looking at the house that filled my whole being with hatred and fear. “See you never you piece of shit house.” I said as I slipped into the driver’s seat of my car backing out of the driveway as the movers pulled up for Mia to deal with.
“Okay fine.” I said and patted the seat next to me on the couch, “Come here then,” I said goofily and cracked my knuckles. “My mom Annabelle was 15 when she met my father Mark Jr. They dated on and off through high school he had a horrible temper when it came to men looking at my mother or my mother talking to other men even way back then. They broke up sophomore year and didn’t talk to each other again until senior year.” I cleared the lump that began to form in my throat it sucked talking about these two in such detail it made my skin crawl but Mia wanted the story so she was going to get the whole story. “Right after graduation my parents were married because, my mother became pregnant with my brother Joey. My mother lived in her own personal hell until she became pregnant with me in winter of 1989,” I said and looked at Mia to watch her face and make sure she was still with me.
“I was born on May 7th 1990, my mom always said that I was the quietest baby ever because I didn’t cry or fuss I enjoyed being alone.” I narrowed my eyes when I heard the slight whisper of Mia saying something along the lines of ‘that sure sounds like you’. “Anyways, my brother told me that from the age of 3 to the age of 9 my father abused my mother in front of him and would scream at him for no reason at all, he said it stopped for a few months when I was born but when I turned 8 months it started up again. I guess he was waiting for my mom to heal enough to start abusing her again.” I bit down on my bottom lip looking at her. “He put her in the hospital because he ran over her on a motorcycle luckily he only broke her arm, she had endured his torture on her for many years my brother turned 10 and I was a year and 6 months old when he got so bad. He’d go to work and then when he got home all he would do was poke at my mom and call her names hit her.” I said and rubbed my arm to pat at the hives that began to form on my arms. “November 15th, I was in my bed when my dad walked in the room because I was whining a little too loud.” I looked at Mia there was a look of pure horror on her face.
“He tried to suffocate me with a pillow, my mom stopped him and locked my brother and I in the closet.” I said coldly, “Next thing I knew I was thrown away like my brother we were given to my aunt, then my grandma, then my uncle, then my father’s mother, then my father’s sister, and then the state.” I said softly and looked at her, “My mother is serving life in prison with no chance of parole,” I said looking at her patting her leg, “That the story you wanted to hear?”
“We-“ She started to say then closed her mouth just sitting there, “Hey don’t be shocked I turned out great, my brother died when he was 15 of a drug overdose and I went to school and college and Now I’m here packing up my childhood home with you so I can sell it and get out of this crappy little town.” I said smiling a little looking at her, “I don’t dwell on my past Mia,” She nodded her head at me and rubbed her neck looking down as she spoke quietly, “I just can’t imagine what you’re feeling inside.” I stood up quickly and looked at her, “I am not one of your psych patients Mia,” I smiled at her and rubbed my neck, “I’m a boring old school teacher with no job right now and soon to be no home but a pocket full of money and a car that runs really good.” I laughed softly and threw the box marked photos in the trash can, “No memories in this box are good ones, trust me I got all the pictures I could ever want from this town already in my car.”
“So, what about the other incident?” Mia asked after we had gotten through a few more packed boxes, “You just want to know my whole life story don’t you Mia?” I chuckled and shrugged, “I was 16 I went to a party got drugged, raped, knocked up, I gave the baby to my Aunt as she can’t have kids and two years later on my 18th birthday I got a link to a website of pictures from my rape party.” I shrugged looking at Mia who rubbed her neck, “Are you a jinx or something?” I blinked a little and thought about that question for a few moments, “I could be, but then again…” I paused and looked at a little glass doll, “Who isn’t a jinx?” Mia blinked rubbing her head she looked clearly confused as she thought about that for the longest time.
“Jess, that makes no sense.” I laughed out loudly and bounced looking over at her, “That’s the point!” I exclaimed as I threw a breakable knickknack into the box breaking it, I shrugged, “One less thing for storage.” I hummed and looked at her with an amused smile, “Are you bipolar?” She asked me seriously I made a silly face, “I’m highly medicated for that my love I am not bipolar I’m just a little crazy.” Mia’s eyes widened so much I thought her eyes would pop right out of her head before she laughed it off. That was the brilliance of our relationship we were both crazy and we both knew it. It wasn’t a medical crazy or something you should be afraid of it was a joking type of crazy that everyone had in them at times. Mia and Jesse just expressed it more often than not.
“So, you never told m-“ I cut her off by holding my hand up I looked at her seriously, “No more life stories, I’m going all story teller over here.” I said laughing softly when she finished her sentence anyways, “Me where on earth you’re planning on leaving and if you were going to come back or keep in touch with your best friend since middle school.” She said putting her hand on her hip. I looked at her and smiled softly, “I don’t know where on earth I am heading or how long I will be there. I will keep in touch with you and I will only come back for important things.” I said as I pushed another box into the pile sitting down on the floor “The movers are going to love you, I mean you’ve pretty much broken everything that was fragile,” Mia said as she picked up a box that made this chime like sound with all the broken glass pieces hitting each other.
“Yeah well if you had the memories of this house like I did, you wouldn’t give two fucks about a single damn thing in this house. All you would care about is getting the fuck out just like me.” I said to her as I poked her nose lightly and walked towards the back room with a slow cautious movement. Flashbacks hit me all the time of this house none of them pleasant. I pushed the door to my parent’s room over and the stale smell of Cigarettes and my mother’s perfume bellowed out of the room. It still looked the same I glanced from one side of the room to the other his things were still here and so were hers, I had never been in this room but once when the police came to get my mother and my brother and I crawled out of my closet and went into the room. I sat down slowly on the bed looking at the busted mirror and the bottles of old perfume laying on the floor. This was their legacy all that was left of them and I wanted to destroy the scene and pack it all away for nobody to ever see again.
I inhaled deeply as I stood from the bed I ripped the sheets off the bed the dust built up on them flew everywhere I watched the sheets float down onto a pile on the floor. I didn’t know why it was so unsettling to be doing this, I grabbed a box out of the hallway and started shoveling things into the box. Clock, perfume, hair brushes, makeup, jewelry, old mail, clothes. One by one boxes were stacked into the hallway as I cleaned out the last bedroom of the house that would need to be cleaned, I looked back and drug the vanity out of the room leaving everything of my fathers in the room. I put a white paper on the door that said ‘Do Not Enter’ on it and closed the door.
I wiped my hands off and saw that the front of the house was empty I flopped onto the couch next to Mia. “Thank you.” I said softly looking at her with a small smile, “Thank you for what?” She questioned looking up from her phone to me. “Thank you for helping me pack this place up, it’s all going into a storage garage in Stockton, California.” I said giving her the address, “My mom is in jail there so, I figured I’d leave the crap in the area in case she tries to appeal the judge and get out of prison.” I said softly and smiled a little throwing my bag over my shoulders, “Lock up when you want,” I said walking out to my car there was two boxes in the back seat of my car. Well, I guess this is growing up, I thought to myself looking at the house that filled my whole being with hatred and fear. “See you never you piece of shit house.” I said as I slipped into the driver’s seat of my car backing out of the driveway as the movers pulled up for Mia to deal with.
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