My Demons

I was fast asleep in dream land, but the sun shining through the window brought me back to reality. I turned to see Dawson beside me, fast asleep as well, and I envied him. I nudged him slightly after a few minutes of admiring his sleeping face, and his beautiful blue eyes looked up at me in confusion.

"The sun's really bright..." I simply said, nodding my head in the direction of the window.

He quickly jumped out of bed and walked over to the window, shutting the blinds, "There," he said as the room fell dark again.

"Can you get me some water, too? I'm so thirsty," I asked, giving him the sweetest face I could muster.

He sighed, but agreed, and headed to the kitchen. While he was gone, he left his bedroom door open and I could see two people laying on the couches, passed out. I felt somewhat special to be able to get the only bed. Smiling to myself, I recalled the previous night and how he had spent hours telling me about his problems. After we kissed, we had some drunken sex and then immediately fell unconscious. It felt good to wake up next to someone for once, a privilege I didn't get to enjoy anymore since breaking it off with Paul three weeks prior.

As he walked back into the room with a bottle of water, a girl's voice from the living room asked, "Who's in there with you?"

"Oh, it's Izzy," Dawson replied, passing me the water and going to shut the door.

"Did you guys fuck?" I heard her ask him, annoying me a little.

"Who's that?" I wondered aloud, looking to Dawson.

"It's Ellie, and no we didn't," he said to me first, and then to her.

I furrowed my eyebrows, "Yeah, we did,"

He gave me an impressed look, "We did? Nice! I guess we did,"

I rolled my eyes and drank my water as he shut his door and got back into the bed with me. Apparently, only I remembered the previous night, which also annoyed me a little. Here I had thought something special had happened, but really he had just been really drunk.

He waited until I set the bottle down, then pulled me in closer to him and cuddled up next to me. I tried to stay annoyed, but he was just too cute, "You're a babe," he told me, kissing my forehead.

I couldn't help but grin at his sweetness, "Thank you,"

We laid in bed and cuddled for a couple hours, sometimes talking, sometimes not. I had missed cuddling with someone so much, and I was beginning to really like Dawson. When you really like someone, cuddling them is so much better. I was just soaking it up, never wanting to leave.

Sometime in the afternoon, however, I got hungry, but he had no food at all in his fridge or cupboards, so I decided to see what my mom was doing.

My relationship with my mom had always been a difficult one, but in the past year or two we had learned how to deal with each other a little better. Living together had always been hard on the both of us, what with my temper and irritability and her not understanding my personality, but since I had moved in with my dad and we saw each other less, the time that we did spend together was a lot better. She was going to look at a cottage an hour outside the city that afternoon and invited me along, so I figured I could pick up some food while I was at it.

It was a beautiful day outside, feeling like summer even though we were mid-September. When I told Dawson I was leaving, he gave me a sad, pouty face and told me not to.

"I can come back if you want," I told him.

Instantly his face lit up, "You can?"

I smiled warmly at him, "Of course, if you want me to,"

"Of course I want you to," he replied, hugging me and kissing my forehead again.

He was so adorable, I couldn't help but actually want him to be my boyfriend, despite my inner turmoil with boys. My feelings were all over the place, and I wasn't sure if I still just wanted revenge or if I really did like him. They felt real, but at the same time, I knew that I was still in love with Paul. It had only been three weeks, after all, and I was in no shape to be forming a brand new relationship. But as I watched him get dressed and search around his room for his cigarette pack, my heart told me to ignore what my head was saying and just go for it.