Starting Over

4. When You Got It

(Before practice POV)

Training camp came and went in a blur of activity. The group was moved from practice to team bonding activities with meals and rest time scheduled between the hustle and bustle of the campus grounds. Coach was satisfied with the new players and was more than happy with the way the guys were taking to Nicole – she fit in as if she had been there for multiple seasons, not a few weeks.

Nicole was the first person dressed and ready for practice on Monday once the team was back in Chicago. Nicole had arrived early, without the carpoolers, and went through her regular routine to dress – the coaching and equipment staff was not separating her from the guys here after Coach Q called the Penguin’s staff to see how things worked for them – he didn’t want Nicole to feel objectified or left out – it was a fine line to walk but Nicole assured him that it would be fine for her to join the guys in the locker room after explaining her master plan – have her under gear on already.

After lacing up her skates, Nicole made her way down the runway; stopping short of stepping on the ice. Nicole took a moment to take in the arena – her new home. The Madhouse was massive in comparison to other barns around the league and this was the first time for Nicole to enter as a home player. Nicole smiled to herself as she stepped onto the ice and glided around. She had her stick in hand and her eyes closed as she felt the ice slip beneath her blades.

“It works better if you have pucks,” Nicole was startled from her serine state as Corey joined her on the ice.

“What are you hear so early for?” Nicole asked as she skated over to her new goalie.
“I like the quiet before practice. Gives me a chance to get in the zone,” Crawford gives her a cheeky smile that says he’s joking.

Nicole gives him a light shove, “Want me to warn you up, Crow?”

“Sure. Let me get ready,” Corey answers as he skates to the goal line. He cuts the ice and gets into position. Nicole goes in slowly several times so Corey has a chance to loosen up properly before he starts chirping her, “Don’t be such a girl, Greenie! My dog has better moves than that!”

Nicole skates to the blue line and stops, looking at number fifty. She gives him a smirk before picking up a puck. She skates hard at the net, Corey comes out of the crease to cut off her angle. Nicole moved the puck forehand to back hand in three quick moves, she slows and fakes left; Corey moves to far in the same direction. Nicole pulls the puck between her skates and swings right, sending the puck top shelf.

“Damn it!” Crawford exclaims as Nicole rounds the net; She’s laughing at Corey when the two hear a collective yell from the bench – the rest of the team had arrive and they saw the whole show.

“Nice hands, Nic!” Shaw was the first to step on the ice and gave Nicole a fist bump.
“Yeah, you may give Kaner a run for it if you have moves like that,” Sharpie was next to greet Nicole with a tap on her helmet.

“It was luck,” Corey defended himself as he skated up to the rest of the players.
“Yeah, right,” Kaner said, “Tell the man you were going easy on him, Collie.”

The team looked at Nicole, “Pat’s right,” Nicole shrugged, and “I’ve got a few more moves I like to save for a rainy day.”

“So modest,” Corey bumped the young woman playfully.
Nicole laughed, “Hey, when you got it, you got it.”

The group laughed along with her as a whistle blew from behind them. Practice was about to start.

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(After Practice POV)

Practice ran a couple of hours and consisted of drills, power play drills, lines were scrambled and changed often, and a shootout at the end.

Nicole was moved to various lines, participated during the penalty kill and power play. Coach wasn’t sure where she would be starting but was happy to see chemistry with her and between both Toews and Kane – that showed her versatility and ability to play with anyone, even two completely different players. She also placed second during the shootout – losing to Kane.

The guys were impressed by Nicole’s abilities and could see that she had worked during the off season – Nicole was winning battles in the corners and pushing much bigger players around.

“Nic, you coming with us to lunch?” Andrew asked as he sat in the empty stall next to her own; Nicole was between Patrick Sharp and Brandon Saad.

“Can’t I have a meeting I have to get too,” Nicole said as she slipped her runners on.
“What for?” Shaw questioned.

“Nosy,” Nicole chirped – Andrew stuck his tongue out at her, “It’s for Reebok. They want me to wear their new women’s line this season.”

“Oh. That makes since with you playing in the NHL and all,” Andrew nods and stands up, “Maybe next time then?”

Nicole stands and gives her teammate a smile, “Next time.”

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(Nicole’s POV)

The meeting was relatively painless and my agent and I were able to come to an agreement with the company. They scheduled a fitting the next day at the UC and the new equipment would be in by the first game.

I had just gotten home and kicked off my shoes when my phone rang. I pulled it out of my pocket and answered without looking.

“Hello?” I asked as I sank into the cushions on my couch.

“Oh merde! You finally answered!” A very distinct French accent came through the receiver. I could hear shuffling in the background as several deep voices asked for the phone. I internally groaned.

“Guys stop! Let me put it on speaker,” the voices said.
“Nicole? Are you there? Please say she didn’t hang up. You’re going to hurt G’s feels if you don’t say something,” it was Marc-Andre who had called.

“I’m here Flower,” I slid down on the floor as the Penguin quieted the others.
“Where have you been? We have tried to contact you all summer! Vero is beside herself with worry,” Flower said, not realizing every word was like a knife stab in the heart.

“I was home all summer. Tell V I’m sorry; I just needed some time away,” i said rubbing my eyes, “Who all is there?” I asked.

“Myself, Kris, Chris, Duper, Geno, Nealer, Paulie, Beau – yeah that’s all,” I could hear Flower’s wheels mentally counting and the pause suggested that someone else was – or had – been there.

The phone shifted and a different voice came out, “How are you ma fille? Is Chicago treating you well?”

“Hey Duper. Chicago is great,” I was trying to not let the nostalgia I was feeling escape; Duper new me well enough to hear it anyway but said nothing.

“The family has missed you. You should visit as soon as you can. I believe you are off the weekend before regular season?” Duper asked but I got the message loud and clear.

“We’ll see Duper. I may have something to come up,” I said vaguely.
“Then we will come to you!” Geno shouted, nearly blowing my speaker, “We miss Королева льда.”
“I miss you guys too.”

There was a pause then a click, I thought the call had dropped until I heard:
“Nicole?”
“Tanger?”

“You are not on speaker anymore. How are you really ma belle fille?”
“The tape isn’t working, Kris,” My voice breaks as the first tear falls.

“Locking us out doesn’t help Nicole. Leaving doesn’t either,” Kris’s voice is gentle but firm.
“I know. I thought it would be easier if I left. That way I couldn’t mess up the team any more than I had,” the tears are flowing freely now.

“The team was not messed up because of you. And we won the cup so really, it was never ‘messed up’” Kris pauses before continuing, “He is not the same, Nicole. He misses you too but is too stubborn to admit it. Like someone else we know, yes?” I don’t have to ask who the ‘he’ is.

“Sidney will be better off without me as a distraction.”
Kris chuckles, “There is my stubborn girl.”

We talk for several more minutes, Kris calms me down like he has always been able too, before hanging up – I don’t want the others to hear me crying and I know I can’t hold it together if they all bombard me with emotions at once. I promise to call and text the guys and to keep the communication open. I also promise to think about visiting – I miss them as much as they miss me it seems.

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(Kris’ POV)

Chris, Duper, Geno, Nealer, Paulie, Beau, Sid and myself had gone to Flower’s home after practice.
Vero was out with some of the other wives so it was just us guys. We all are down in the basement watching a movie when Beau pipes up.

“Has anyone been able to make contact with Nic?”

We all look at the young player; surprise written on all of our faces. No one had brought up the subject of Nicole around Sidney since the trade announcement.

Duper is the first to answer, “I’ve text and called her but no reply since before the trade.”

The others – minus Sidney – all say the same thing. Flower pulls his phone out and taps the screen.

“What are you doing?” I ask our goalie.

“I’m calling her. She’s bound to answer eventually,” Marc answers; Sidney fidgets in his seat.

A look of surprise fallowed by pure happiness crosses the man’s features, “Oh merde! You finally answered!”

We all jump and scramble to get closer to Flower – Sidney storms up the stairs.

“Guys stop! Let me put it on speaker,” Flower says as he moves the phone away.
“Nicole? Are you there? Please say she didn’t hang up. You’re going to hurt G’s feels if you don’t say something,” Marc said as silence fallowed.

“I’m here Flower,” Nicole’s voice was like music to my ears as she sighed – clearly she wasn’t expecting us on the line.

“Where have you been? We have tried to contact you all summer! Vero is beside herself with worry,” Flower asked.

“I was home all summer. Tell V I’m sorry; I just needed some time away,” there was another pause, “Who all is there?” Nicole asked.

“Myself, Kris, Chris, Duper, Geno, Nealer, Paulie, Beau – yeah that’s all,” I gave Flower a questioning look when he omitted Sidney from the list.

Duper reached out and took the phone from our goalies hand; he had taken Nicole’s silence the hardest – she was like a daughter to him and the two had gotten close during the season.

“How are you ma fille? Is Chicago treating you well?”
“Hey Duper. Chicago is great,” Both Duper and I heard the quiver in Nicole’s voice.
“The family has missed you. You should visit as soon as you can. I believe you are off the weekend before regular season?” Duper asked.

“We’ll see Duper. I may have something to come up,” Nicole said vaguely.
“Then we will come to you!” Geno shouted from his spot, “We miss Королева льда.”
“I miss you guys too.”

I reached for the phone next and took the call off speaker while walking into a different room; I needed to ask Nicole some questions that could cause her to lose her resolve and I knew she hated crying in front of the guys.

“Nicole?”
“Tanger?”

“You are not on speaker anymore. How are you really ma belle fille?”
“The tape isn’t working, Kris,” Nicole’s voice breaks and I can picture the first tear falling.

“Locking us out doesn’t help Nicole. Leaving doesn’t either,” I say; my voice is gentle but firm as was our way.

“I know. I thought it would be easier if I left. That way I couldn’t mess up the team any more than I had,” the tears are flowing freely now I can tell.

“The team was not messed up because of you. And we won the cup so really, it was never ‘messed up’” I pauses before continuing, “He is not the same, Nicole. He misses you too but is too stubborn to admit it. Like someone else we know, yes?” I don’t have to say who the ‘he’ is – it is understood.

“Sidney will be better off without me as a distraction.”
I chuckle, “There is my stubborn girl.”

We talk for several more minutes, I calm her down before hanging up. Nicole promise to call and text the guys and to keep the communication open. She also promise to think about visiting – we all miss her greatly.

I walk back into the room; Sidney has joined the group once again.

“Well?” Paulie asks as I sit down.

I take a moment before answering, “The girl is broken and hurting but she is putting on a brave face for her new team. No one seems to notice except for maybe Toews – which doesn’t surprise me.”

“Does she miss us?” Neal asks from his spot next to Paul.
“Greatly,” I answer giving Sidney a look before continuing, “She left so she wouldn’t be a burden to the team. She didn’t want to cause any more trouble.”

“She chose to leave?” Sidney asked in surprise.
“Yes,” I answer but don’t elaborate – there are something’s better left unsaid.