I Knew You Were Trouble

Oli’s POV

Light begun filling up the room as the sun started to rise. For hours I couldn’t switch off my mind as a load of unwanted thoughts kept running through my head. I’ve shuffled, I’ve twisted and turned all night but I couldn’t get myself to switch off and stop.

My mind was gradually eating away at me and I’d refuse to sleep. I couldn’t sleep, how could I when my body was afraid of the demons and horrors which waited for me to fall under its spell and take me alive. Sleep is just a cousin of death and the nightmares were its henchmen. The second you let your guard down and fall under its slumber they creep into your mind and take over your mind and soul and there’s nothing you can do but hope for a miracle to save you.

My trembling body rested against the wall while my teeth grinded against each other. It was a nasty habit of mine but it’s been two days since I last had a fix for Tom’s sake but shamefully I’m beginning to lose it.

I chose to try a different approach to distract myself and my eyes flicker to the beautiful boy lying in bed next to me. He was lying on his stomach facing me with his hands tucked underneath the pillow. His face sunken into the sheets as he slept peacefully, occasionally letting little sounds slip from his parted lips. I smile to myself at his unknown cuteness.

I often watch Josh sleep; I find it fascinating and sometimes even calming. I’m still unsure of how someone so stunning and innocent can have this much of an effect on me. He was just a kid. But there was something about him which always made me come back to him. No matter how many times I left with no intension on seeing him again, I always find myself coming back for more and its so bloody frustrating because I have no idea why.

I clench my jaw harshly at the frustration and overwhelming feeling of needing a fix as soon as possible. My eyes fix themselves on Josh as I tried to ignore the anger and nagging voice in my head for what my body so desperately screamed out for the most. Both of my hands were clenched into balls of fists and my body began to shake more fiercely as I did everything I could to hold back my addiction.

I couldn’t risk Josh waking up and witnessing me like this, I would never forgive myself if I hurt him.

I couldn’t take it anymore, I needed to leave. Now.
I climb over Josh carefully so I wouldn’t wake him up and quickly got dressed. I slip on my shoes and I head straight for the door. My hand reaches for the handle but it’s too late.

“Oli?”

I jump back from the door and spin around at the husky morning voice which called my name. My heart racing in fear and wide paranoid eyes set themselves on a very sleepy looking Josh.

Shit, he woke up.

He props himself up on his elbows and rubs the sleep from his eyes.

“Why are you leaving?” he asks yet again in the husky voice I find myself liking quite a lot.
“I have to go.” I couldn’t stand still. I kept shifting around, my eyes darting all around the room; my hands kept intertwining and fiddling around with each individual finger. I needed to get a fix as soon as possible.

“You said you’ll stay.”
“And I did. Now I must go.” I said maybe a little too harshly when I see the expression on Josh’s face but I couldn’t stop myself from snapping at him. I had to get out of here.

I really didn’t want him to see me when I so badly craved a fix. I didn’t become a very nice person and I wasn’t the best at controlling my anger when I felt so on edge either. Accidents often happen and I definitely didn’t want Josh to feel the back of my hand when I lose control or worse.

“Ouch!” he hissed when he tried sitting up, his nose scrunched up as he visibly felt pain down below.

I send him an apologetic smile. I may have gone abit over board with him last night. I was rather rough and aggressive, a lot of frustration and aggravation had built up inside me over the last two weeks that I just went all out when I got my hands on him.

We ended up fucking most of the night and he so willing allowed me to do as I pleased to his body. So of course this morning he must be feeling sore.

I walk over to the bed and crouch down so I was level with him and place my hand on his shoulder to comfort him.

“Oli… What’s wrong?” he stares worriedly at me with those beautiful crystal blue eyes which made me feel weird inside. What the fuck?

“Your hand is shaking.” He whispers, glancing down at my hand on his shoulder and I quickly pull it away. I clench my jaw and my teeth start grinding against each other again. Fuck, I should have just left when I had the chance, now he’s going to be asking annoying questions which don’t concern him.

“Please talk to me.” he pleads and I let out a heavy sigh. He more or less knows, I might as well tell him. What’s the worse that can happen? He hasn’t judged me about it before…

“I need a fix.” I murmur shamefully, ducking my head to avoid eye contact.
“Uh, well, I do have some of your weed left over if that would help?” he offers but it wasn’t enough.
“No. I need something stronger.”
“Oh.”

I had to get out of here but I knew Josh wouldn’t let me leave so easily now he knew what I craved. He was so anti drugs even though he knew I was involved with them and that I managed to persuade him into smoking weed himself.

I had to find something to distract him, something which will keep his mind off me and preoccupied on something else. Then an idea suddenly popped into my head.

“I’ll run you a bath.” I say softly and scoop him up in my arms and he lets out a little squeal. He wraps his arms around my neck and I carry him to the bathroom.

Josh’s POV

He sets me down on my feet in the bathroom and I reluctantly untangle my arms from around his neck. I watch him walk over to the bath tub and turn on the taps and he holds his hand under the running water until it was the right temperature for me.

“Be right back.” He says standing up and leaving the room.

I don’t question him but lean my head against the tile wall because every limb was literally aching from the never ending actives of last night.

When Oli returns the room had become hot and steamy but my attention fall to the bottle of salt in his hand which I pull a confuse face at.

“Why do you need salt?”
“Salt baths are best for these kinds of sores. Trust me J, you’ll feel loads better after.”
“O-okay.” I nod and I let him pour the salt into the bath and mix it in with the warm water.

Oli walks over to me once he’s done and grabs the hem on my t-shirt and I let him pull it over my head, dropping it on the floor. His dark circle eyes run over my chest, his shaky finger tips tracing over the numerous hickeys he left on my skin only hours ago. His touch alone had me shivering all over regardless of the fact the room was hot and stuffy from the running water.

He grabs my chin and pulls my mouth to his and we instantly fall into a heavy aggressive kiss. His tongue pushes its way past my lips and fights for his power almost immediately. He pushes me hard against the tile wall which causes me to grunt in pain into his mouth. Oli doesn’t stop kissing me though, my fingers knitting into his hair as I begin to lose myself in the heat of the moment.

Oli’s hands grip unkindly at my hips and pull my lower half closer to his. A hand slides up at the back of one of my thighs and he hooks my leg around his waist and begins grinding himself into me. Oh God, he feels so good against me.

Every inch of my body screamed pain but I didn’t care. I wanted to have him again in anyway if I could.

I understood now when he said he craved a fix, he was being so rough with me and I knew now that he had no idea that he was. But I still wanted every part of him.
I wanted him to crave me as much as I craved him. I wanted to be his drug like he was slowly becoming mine. I wanted to be his light to his darkness. He didn’t need to turn to drugs for whatever reason, there’s so much more to life if only he would let me in and show him that life can be beautiful if given the chance.

Oli bites down harshly on my lower lip and tugs it between his teeth causing me to whimper in pain. He lets go and pulls back letting us finally gasps for air. I couldn’t help but taste a copper like flavour in my mouth and my hand goes to inspect my lips but when I pull my hand back, there’s blood on the tops of my fingers.

Shit, he made me bleed.

I run my tongue over my bottom lip, licking up the evidence of the assault he just made on my body. My eyes flicker up to meet his and he was staring back at me with wide concern eyes and I knew this was already over.

“Bath with me?” I say breathlessly, hoping he would like the idea of joining me in the bath and forget this little accident. I didn’t want him to leave like this.
His hands drop to his sides and he steps back away from me and shakes his head.
“I need to go.”

He pushes past me and heads for the bathroom door.

“Can I see you later?” I panic, having a horrible feeling in my chest that if I let him go like this then he would do another disappearing act again.
“Will you be up for it? I’m not sure your body can handle me right now. You should rest.” He says.

He doesn’t want your company Josh, you’re nothing to him if he can’t fuck you.

“I’m sure I’ll feel fine after this bath, you said so yourself.”
“Alright.” He shrugs and my heart drops at how unenthusiastic he sounds.
“I finish work at 8.”

Oli lets out a low growl and stomps his way back over to me and a rush of anxiety fills my body. He grabs my boxers and yanks them down my legs so I was now standing completely naked in front of him.

I don’t move. I wasn’t sure what to expect from him when he was craving… but I can’t imagine anything good. Shit, I should have just let him leave now he’s angry with me. He scoops me up in his arms again and sets me down in the bath. I hiss loudly when my sensitive body hits the hot salty water and I cling to him as all my muscles tense up.

Oli takes me by surprise when his hand grabs the back of my head and pulls me forcefully towards him. He places his lips to my forehead and lightly places a kiss which I didn’t expect from him at all. His mood swings were unreal.

“See you later.” He whispers against my forehead before he stands up and leaves.

~~

As soon as I walked into work Alex sees me and follows after me into the changing rooms.

“Oh no you didn’t!” he sassed when he saw me awkwardly walk in here. The salt bath worked wonders but I was still a little sore.

“What happened to ‘That twat can go fuck himself’ huh, lover boy?” Alex mocks wanting to know the juicy gossip which makes me roll my eyes at him. It was only days ago that I was in here ranting to him about how much I didn’t want to see Oli again. So much for that.

“Well, I sort of changed my mind.” I blush and start putting my things in my locker.
“Your hopeless you know that right? I just hope you know what you’re doing with this guy, Josh. I don’t want him using you.”
“Don’t worry Alex, I know what I’m doing.” I hope.

Alex leans his back against the lockers as I start to change into my work uniform.

“The D that good?” he asks curiously with that cheeky look I know too well. He’s such a girl when it comes to gossip I swear to god.
“Unbelievable.” I truthfully say and we both burst out laughing.
“Even better than mine?”
“Sorry to break it to you sweetheart but yes, even better than yours.” I confirm and he pouts which makes me laugh in response.

We had a one night stand many months ago. Alex was pissed off with Jack over something and I was sad and horny and it just kind of happened. I thought it would affect our friendship but it only made us become closer friends and no one knows about it but us. Not even Oli can find out that information.

Alex is the bestest friend you could ask for really. He was never afraid to speak his mind and way too overly confident at invading your personal space, yet he would always have your back in a fight no matter what. And not to mention he’s gay as fuck and understands me a lot more than Max does.

“Jesus, he sure likes to leave his mark doesn’t he?” Alex says staring at my bare chest which was covered in dark purple love bites. I quickly pull my work shirt on feeling uneasy with Alex seeing them.

“Are you in there Gaskarth? You’re not getting paid to slack off and gossip to your friends you know!” a voice shouts through the door which sounded a lot like Hayley’s.

Alex huffs and rolls his eyes.

“I swear that red head can be a right bitch.” He complains before walking out of the changing rooms.

~~

Okay I admit that I somewhat felt upset when I didn’t find Oli standing by my car waiting for me like he usually does. I look around me incase he was approaching from a far but to my disappointment he was nowhere in sight.

I let out a sigh and climb into the front seat of my car so I wasn’t standing out in the cold. He was probably running late, he did say he would see me later, so I guess I’ll just wait for him.

After about 20 minutes of a no show, I glance down at my phone in annoyance to see the prick hasn’t even bothered to text me to say he’s not coming. I click on his name and hold the phone up to my ear as I waited impatiently as it continuously rings.

“Of course you’re ignoring me you fucking prick.” I curse when I try calling him for the second time. I hang up and type out an angry text basically telling him he’s an asshole and not to bother coming over at all. I throw my phone onto the seat next to me and drive home.

~~

“Hey, I’m heading out to Chris’s if you wanna come along?” Max offers when I walk through the door.

I pull a face at the offer, I wasn’t in the mood to do anything at all. I just wanted to be on my own.

“Thanks but I’m not in the mood.” I say truthfully and take a packet of pot noodle out of the cupboard to have for my dinner.
“Come on Josh, you haven’t hung out with us in ages. Its just gonna be me and Chris so you don’t have to worry about Dan being there.” I snort as if he really thought I was worried about Dan being there. I didn’t care about that arrogant twat anymore.

“I’m really tired from work Max, maybe another time.”
“Is Oli coming over?” he asks with a hint of jealously and spite in his tone.
“No.” I turn around facing him, quirking up an eyebrow. What is he getting at?
“Just checking your not bailing out on your friends so you can get laid.”
“Are you serious?” I hissed.
“It wouldn’t be the first time, Josh.” He points out and my mouth drops open. I can’t believe what I’m hearing right now.

“Well, it’s nice to know what my best mate thinks of me. I thought you were the only one who didn’t see me as a slut but thanks for proving me wrong. Have fun at Chris’s.” I snap angrily and storm off to my room.

“Josh wait, I didn’t mean it!”

I ignore him and slam my door shut rather loudly so he would get the hint to piss off. It hurt to hear him say that about me.

I climb into bed with my pot noodle, feeling fairly shitty about myself and now not feeling hungry anymore. I just wanted the bed to swallow me up. I sigh heavily and turn on my laptop and put on LOST to play in the background while I felt sorry for myself and drown my sorrows into my pillowcase.

~~

My body wakes as a heat of warmness engulfs me. I hum and stir in my bed and shuffle closer to the sudden welcoming warmth and that’s when I feel a pair of arms wrap around my waist.

“O-Oli?” I croak my voice full of sleep. I squint my eyes open at the body lying next to me but I’m met with darkness.
“I didn’t mean to wake you.” He whispers, his fingers combing through my hair.

“Are you okay?” I mumble, closing my eyes again but still wanted to know how he was.
“Yeah. Sorry I didn’t show earlier.” He says and I hum in response, far too tired to argue.
“Do you want to have sex?” I ask, knowing that’s why he’s here.
“No.”

No? This is a first. How much drugs did he consume for him to say no to sex?

“Go back to sleep Sunshine.” He whispers into my hair before pulling me closer to him and kissing my head softly. And I’m met with an overwhelming feeling of butterflies fluttering around in my stomach.

I try my best to ignore them and nuzzle my face into Oli’s chest and let out a tired yawn as I feel his arms tighten around me. I instantly relax and allowed the sleep to take over me again.