Lets Make It Last Forever

“Rae…I want you to come home…please? I’m sorry. I’ve thought about it all and…I’m just really fucking sorry, okay? If I could take it back, I would, but I can’t. Please…just come home, babe. I miss you, I miss Emily…I want-”

“This voicemail box is full. Please try again at a later time.” Zacky was cut off by the voicemail’s voice.

He’d tried for hours through texts and voicemails to reach Rae so he could apologize, but she never called or texted him back. He was almost positive that she didn’t even open her new messages or voice messages.

What he said was nothing short of sincere. He’d thought long and hard after Matt left, shortly after his hopefully soon to-be brother in-law slammed his knuckles into his teeth. Man, Matt taught Rae well.

Zacky felt like the scum of the earth. Having yelled at his innocent daughter, then insulting his fiancé like no one’s business to the point where she ignored everything that had to do with Zacky besides taking care of a very upset Emily. He wanted to take it back and he seriously would if he could.

It was starting to become a routine; a fight, Rae runs off with Emily and then Zacky apologizes like no tomorrow until Rae forgives him and comes home. He started to feel and know for a fact that if she didn’t come home this time, she never would and that would be the end between them. No wedding, no perfect family, maybe little to no visitation with his little girl if Rae got her way. Zacky wouldn’t be able to live with himself if that was to ever happen. He’d quite the band and all the partying and drinking before he’d lose his only child. He would understand Rae’s reasoning, of course, but he’d never be able to forgive himself.

Zacky grabbed his phone from the counter with a sigh and opened a new text message with Rae’s cell number and began to type in: I miss you babe. Please talk to me…I love you.

He never got a message back, even though he’d been trying for almost a week. It’d been a long week of not talking to the love of his life and his daughter. It was the hardest time of his life as far as he was concerned.

Giving up on waiting for the vibration from his phone to tell him he had a new message. Zacky leaned his head back against the couch and closed his eyes. They burned behind his eyelids, but he didn’t want to cry; that was the last thing he wanted and needed. He slung his left arm over his face to cover his eyes, trying to get some much needed sleep since he hadn’t much in the past few days when the feeling of being alone had sunk in.

He laid there for a few minutes, finally getting the burning to stop coming from his tear ducts and just stayed quiet besides his random sighs and soft, but heavy breathing patterns.

The sound of a key slipping in the slot on the outside part of the door put Zacky on alert. Only one other person beside’s he and Rae had a key, and that was Matt. At this point, he didn’t care who came in. Some sort of company was better then non right now. He kept his arm over his closed eyes and stayed quiet, awaiting the person to walk into the living room after they shut the door. The sound of high heeled shoes clicked against the strip of hardwood flooring just inside the front door; Rae.

Now he wanted to let himself cry.

Rae slipped her keys into her bag and set it off to the side as she looked around the room, wanting to focus on something other then the disorderly man who sat on the middle cushion of the couch. She peered at the coffee table that sat just as she left it; every remote where she’d put them, weighing down her Rolling Stone magazine.

She quietly walked over, silently lowering herself onto the couch on Zacky’s left side; she never took her gaze off of him. If anything, she was miserable just as he was, if not more, but she wasn’t too sure. She had her daughter, he didn’t. So maybe he was worse off.

Gently placing her hand on his left thigh, she removed his arm from his face to see his eyes closed. He’d fallen asleep after figuring out it was her who walked through the door. He looked so peaceful, yet so troubled by what had been going on. She knew it wasn’t all her fault, nor was it all his. She wanted him to see that she wasn’t some whore like he’d called her so many times. She wanted him to see that Emily needed him, but yet she was afraid to be near him and ask him a question in fear of getting the third degree again.

“Zack…are you awake?” Rae asked quietly next to his ear.

The only reply she got was a deep, in-sleep sigh and a movement of his mouth, signaling that his tongue had shifted to lick the roof of his mouth, his jaw moving up and down a bit.

Shaking her head to herself, she pulled the blanket from the arm of the couch and laid it across their laps, then put Zacky’s left arm around her shoulders while she snuggled into his side. Instinctively, Zacky’s arm tightened around her shoulders just as he always did when they cuddled.

She felt complete and content, but she knew that when Zacky awoke, he wouldn’t. There was still a piece of the puzzle missing. Hopefully, that piece would appear and forgive Zacky for his actions so that they could be a family again.