The First Cut is the Deepest

I waited all day for the pub crawl tonight. Since this was my first pub crawl, I just couldn't contain my excitement. Both Chris and Will had to tell me to calm down every once in a while. So as soon as class ended for the day, I started counting down the hours until we would leave. We still had about two and a half hours until then. In the meantime though, I hung out with Chris in my room. As for Will, he was probably with Annabella in her room or something.

"So should I wear jeans and a nice shirt or a casual dress?" I asked Chris after we talked for about half an hour. He was currently sitting on my bed, facing me as my back was turned and I was looking through my closet.

"Keep in mind we're only going to pubs, not clubs."

"Right. So jeans and a nice shirt."

"Also keeps in mind, we're gonna get piss wasted, so..."

"Right. Jeans and a regular shirt. I don't want to throw up on a nice shirt," I said with a laugh. Chris laughed with me.

"Right," he said as he leaned back on his elbows onto my bed. "So what are you gonna do with Jason?" he asked. I stopped looking through my folded shirts in the bottom drawer of my dresser and turned around to face Chris.

"To be honest, I don't know," I said as I put my hands on my hips. "I never thought he'd be so bent up on getting back together with me. Because when we were together, it was all a lie, you know? I don't know why all of a sudden he wants me back."

"Maybe there's something mentally wrong with his head?" Chris suggested.

"See? I thought that too, but Erin said I was just being dramatic."

"Erin?"

"Yeah, my best friend back in California," I explained.

"Oh, I see. As you were saying."

"Yeah, so Jason just needs to go away," I said with a shrug as I dropped the subject. I picked up a shirt and brought it up to my body. "This shirt?" I asked.

"Too nice. Pick that one," he said as he pointed to a different shirt.

"Ooh... Good pick."

"Thank you," Chris said with a smile.

"You're like my gay guy friend that helps me pick out what clothes to wear," I said with a laugh.

"I assure you, I'm not gay," Chris defended himself.

"But where's the fun in that?" I asked as I laughed again. He rolled his eyes at me. "So now what? We still have, like, two hours left," I said as I glanced at my phone to check the time.

"Watch some telly?" he suggested with a shrug. I giggled.

"Telly? Sure," I said as I giggled some more. He rolled his eyes at me again, a smile on his face.

We both walked to the couch and I plopped myself on it right before Chris did. He grabbed the remote and turned on the TV.

"What do you want to watch?" he asked me.

"I don't know. What's good?" I asked back.

"Let's see," he started as he flipped through the channels.

A few minutes after just flipping through channels to watch something, the door opened. Will walked in, his messenger bag sloppily placed on his shoulders. He turned to us when he heard the TV.

"What are you doing here?" Will asked Chris.

"Hanging out. You?"

"You dumb arse, I live here."

Chris just stared at Will. "And...?" Will rolled his eyes at him and dumped his bag on his bed. I giggled and high fived Chris.

"Are you guys seriously out to piss me off all the time?" Will asked as he walked into the kitchen and grabbed a water bottle from the fridge.

"Duh!" Both Chris and I said at the same. We laughed and high fived each other again.

"Damn pricks..." I heard Will mutter.

Chris had finally settled on something to watch, but I wasn't really watching. Why? Oh, because the way Will opened his water bottle... Damn... Who knew opening a water bottle looked so damn hot? The way his muscles flexed in his uniform shirt. Imagine him doing that without a shirt on. I shook my head to get rid of those perverse thoughts.

He has a girlfriend, Nicole! No checking him out no matter how hot he is!

I mentally scolded myself.

After mindlessly watching TV for nearly two hours, it was almost time to leave. I stood up from the couch, telling Chris I was going to change. I grabbed the clothes I was going to wear and changed in the bathroom. I left the bathroom after I was done and dropped my uniform on my bed carelessly. I looked through the drawer in my nightstand and pulled out a silver necklace with matching earrings and a bracelet. I put them on and walked back into the bathroom. I opened my mirror cabinet and grabbed my body spray. I quickly sprayed myself and then walked back to where Chris was at and sat back down on the couch. He sniffed the air before he spoke up.

"You smell nice," he commented and I laughed.

"Cool. Thanks," I replied.

"Let's go," Will said as he jingled his keys in his hand.

Both Chris and I stood up and I straightened my shirt. I grabbed a small bag of my mine that I already put all my essentials in. All three of us walked to the elevator and we went to pick up everyone else at the floor above us. After we picked up everyone else, we made our way out of the dorm building. Then we started walking towards a direction I hadn't been to yet.

"Where are we going?" I asked Chris.

"We're going to get our cars," he said as we walked a bit further to a garage type building. We entered the building and it was pretty big. It was about the size of a four-story parking structure.

"Is this where everyone keeps their cars?" I asked.

"Yup," Chris said. "My car is here," he said as he gestured to a car in front of us. And damn, he had a nice car. I looked over and saw that Will and everyone else were getting into another car across from us. I noticed it wasn't as nice as Chris' car though.

"How come Chris has a nice car and you don't?" I asked Will. He glared at me.

"I do have a nice car. But I'm not stupid. I won't bring my nice car to school and just leave it here. Bloody hell no!"

"Uh-huh..." I said as we all got into our own separate cars. Chris and I put on our seat belts and we made our way out of the parking structure. I had to get used to the driver's side being on the right side instead of the left side. "I just realized," I started. "Remember when you showed me around that first week when I arrived here?"

"Yeah, what about it?" he asked.

"Why'd we take a taxi if you had a car?"

"Well, for one, I had a feeling we were going to get so plastered that I wouldn't be able to drive."

"Okay, that's understandable."

"And secondly, I didn't have my car then. It was in the repair shop."

"Oh, I see. Was it there for any particular reason?"

"Heh. Funny story actually," he started with a laugh. "About a month before school started up again, Will and I went out and had a few drinks."

"Please don't tell me you drank and drove..."

"Actually..." I slapped his arm. "Ow! What was that for?"

"Don't drink and drive, stupid! You could have gotten killed!"

"Aw, you care about me!"

"Of course I do! You're my closest friend here!" I said before I sighed. "Okay, tell me what happened exactly then."

"As I was saying, Will and I had a few drinks. And it was getting late, so we got into my car and we made our way home. The streets were pretty much empty, except a few cars every now and then. I was on the way to drop Will off at his house when the accident happened. You see, Will lives in a fairly secluded area. For about two miles or so, give or take, there's forest and trees on the way to his house. And then there's a long driveway leading up to his house. At night, it gets pretty dark on the road. There were streetlights every so often, but it in our drunken states, it was just a blur that hurt our eyes. Anyways, a deer suddenly jumped out onto the road and Will shouted for me to move. I swerved out of the way just in time, but I didn't realize that there was a tree so close in front of us. So we crashed into the tree." I gasped.

"Then what happened?" I asked.

"I was woken up to Will shaking me. I opened my eyes and the airbags had come out. They saved our lives," Chris said with a light laugh. "I saw Will had blood running from his forehead. He had a gash right before his hairline," he said as he referred to the spot where Will got it. "He has a scar now, but his hair kind of covers it. We were lucky. We only got away with a scar to Will's head and a sprained wrist for me." I watched as he moved his left wrist in circles. "My wrist is never gonna be the same. My car though... It was completely totaled," he said with another laugh.

"Promise me you won't do that again," I said seriously.

"Do what again?"

"Drink and drive," I said as I looked at him. Chris glanced at me from the corner of his eye and he could tell I was actually concerned for him.

"Okay," he said. "I promise. Will and I are even the designated drivers tonight. See? We learned from our mistakes."

"Uh-huh..." I said. Right after I said that, Chris pulled into a parking lot.

"Our first pub for tonight," he said.

"Yay!" I cheered as I clapped my hands and unbuckled my seat belt. We both got out of the car when Will's car pulled into the parking spot right next to us. We all entered the pub and James offered to pay for the first round of drinks.

Long story short, we hit four pubs. Yeah, four pubs. Chris told me that that wasn't even their record. If anything, that was the least amount of pubs they've hit in one night. Talk about party animals. And of course, I was completely wasted.




After the pub crawl, we made our way back to school. We all entered the lift at our dorm building, Sara holding onto James, the yankee holding onto Chris, and Annabella holding onto me. Since Chris and I were the designated drivers, we were the only ones who weren't wasted. And I thought that the yankee was annoying when sober, imagine her wasted. She was bugging the shit out of me until she finally managed to fall asleep in Chris' arms. Chris turned to me as we got to Ann's floor.

"Can you take Nicole to your room while I take Ann to her room? I mean, it'd save us both the trip, since you and Nicole, and James are on the same floor, while everyone else including me are on this floor," Chris said. I stared at him for a good five seconds. I already thought about that earlier, but I really didn't want to do that. I was willing to make that extra trip, but I knew Chris wasn't and I could tell by the bags under his eyes that he was tired.

"But why can't James take her? He's on the same floor as me." Chris looked at me, clearly fed up with my lame-ass excuse. "Okay, fine," I finally said. I turned to Ann and kissed the top of her head. "I'll see you tomorrow morning. Sleep well," I said. She smiled up at me, her eyes starting to droop. I let go of her and let Chris support her.

"Here, take her," he said as he nudged the yankee towards me. I looked at her in disgust.

"Just put her down there," I said with a nod towards the floor of the lift. Chris looked at me incredulously. "Just put her there. I'll take care of her. Jeez..." He looked at me one more time before he gently placed her against the lift wall.

"If I find her still here tomorrow, I'm gonna kick your arse," he said.

"As if you could," I said as I scoffed. He rolled his eyes at me as he, Ann and Sara left the lift and made their way to their rooms. The lift doors closed and I placed my hands in my jean pockets. The lift came to our floor and the doors opened. James looked up at me.

"You're gonna take care of her, right? Not just leave her here?" James asked. I shrugged.

"Maybe..." I said.

"Do you need help?"

"Nah, I got it," I replied.

"Uh... Well, okay... I'm gonna go to my room now, so goodnight..." he trailed off.

"Goodnight," I replied. He lingered a bit longer as I turned to the yankee. I lightly kicked at her foot. "Get up." I glanced back and James quickly turned around and entered his room. I turned back to the yankee. "Get up," I said louder. She stirred and slowly opened her eyes. Then she started giggling uncontrollably. "Oh gosh..." I muttered as I rubbed my forehead. I pulled at her arm and tried to get her to stand up on her own. She wouldn't fucking budge! I grunted loudly as I ran my fingers through my hair. I picked her up by her underarms and dragged her to our room. She was so light.

"You know, Will, you're strong. Like, really strong!" she slurred. "Did you have fun tonight? I had fun tonight!"

"Shh!" I shushed her so she wouldn't wake up anyone on our floor. As I searched my pocket for my key card, I realized this had happened once before. She had gotten drunk once with Chris and she had gotten in late. And I had to carry her to her bed while she spoke drunken gibberish. Then she started honking up the contents of her stomach. I cringed at the thought. I slid my key card through, turned the handle, and pushed the door open with my foot.

"Do you know why I went drinking tonight?" she asked through slurred words.

"Oh, why? Please enlighten me on why," I said sarcastically with a dull voice.

"Because of Jason," she replied. I looked down at her in shock.

Why would she drink over him? Why over Jason?

"Why?" I asked. She had peaked my interest. I set her down on her bed so she could sit up.

"Because..." she started. "Because he's a cheating bastard!" she exclaimed as she threw her hands up in the air. I sat on the side of my bed and faced her. "He cheated on me for the whole two months that we were together! With his bitch ex-girlfriend, Tracy! Gosh, I hate that bitch! I hate them both! I'm pretty sure her boobs are fake!" she vented.

"Wow..." I muttered to myself as I rested my elbow on my knee so I could rest my chin on my palm. "But why would you drink so much over someone you hate so much?" I asked. She gulped before she replied. She whispered something I couldn't really hear. "Sorry, what was that?" I asked.

"He broke my heart..." she said a bit louder. I couldn't have heard that right. "He broke my fucking heart! And he has the fucking nerve to come here and just... and just..." She couldn't finish her sentence as she broke out into tears. I widened my eyes in shock.

Oh no. I just opened the Gates of Hell!

I thought as I panicked. I stood up and quickly grabbed a tissue to hand to her.

Gosh! Make it stop! Don't cry!

She grabbed the tissue from my hand, wiped her eyes and then blew her nose in it. I looked at her in disgust before I gave her another tissue. Her eyes eventually started drooping and she closed her eyes to sleep. The sad thing is that her tears were still falling down her face as she slept. I hesitantly moved closer to her. I slowly reached out my hand and wiped away the tears on her face.




I didn't remember much after the last pub, but I remember as much as getting back to the dorms. Everything else was a blur. Though I faintly remembered feeling something warm – maybe a hand? – on my cheeks as I slept.

I woke up the next morning, my head killing me. "Ugh..." I groaned as I sat up in my bed. I looked to the left of me and saw Will's bed already empty and the bathroom empty. I looked around the room and he was nowhere in sight. He probably already left for class.

As I got out of my bed, I regretted doing a pub crawl last night. Why would Chris ever suggest a pub crawl on a Monday night? I shook my head, but instantly stopped when my head hurt even more. As I was about to stand up, I looked to my bedside table to the left of me and was surprised to see two aspirins and a glass of water there. I smiled to myself. At least Will was nice enough to leave that for me. I took the aspirins and gulped the water. I set the glass back down on the bedside table before I got up and got ready for class.

After taking a shower and getting dressed, I walked back into the bathroom to brush my teeth. I looked at the mirror in shock. I leaned over the sink and took a closer look at myself. My eyes were so puffy! I rubbed my eyes a little, hoping it would go away, but it didn't. I rushed to the kitchen and made myself a sandwich bag full of ice. I pressed the cold ice against my eyelids for a few minutes. I checked my eyes in the mirror again. The swelling went down a bit, but it was still puffy. I grunted in annoyance. I put the ice back on for a little bit longer.

After nearly fifteen minutes of doing that, the swelling went down enough for me to use makeup to cover up the rest of it. As I was putting my eye makeup on, I started to wonder why my eyes were so swollen. My eyes never swelled this much unless I had been crying. That couldn't possibly have happened though, because I barely remembered what happened after the last pub. I could have ran down the streets naked for all I knew. I stopped putting on my makeup and looked in the mirror, horrified. I couldn't have.... No, it wasn't possible. Chris or someone else would have stopped me before that even happened. I shook my head and continued putting on my makeup, though I still wondered how my eyes got so puffy like this.

I finished my makeup and looked at the time. I didn't realize I completely missed first period. "Shit..." I cursed. I finished getting ready and grabbed a few granola bars to last me until lunch. I put the bars in my bag along with my cell phone and key card. I left my room and headed for the elevator. I still had to stop by my locker to grab my book for second period. I made it to second period about fifteen minutes late. As I walked in, I saw Jason snicker at me. I glared at him and sat in my seat.

"It's been becoming a habit of yours to miss first period..." Will muttered to me.

"Yeah, and it's been becoming a habit of yours to break all the rules you set up. Except for rule number four," I replied. I looked at him from the corner of my eye as he thought to himself.

"Rule number four..." he muttered to himself as he recalled what rule that was. "What? What about rule number six? I haven't looked at you when you're changing or going or coming from the shower. Only that one time..." he said and by the small smirk on his face, I could tell he was recalling that one time he caught me changing.

"I never said you were breaking rule number six. I was. You have nice abs," I said with a playful wink at him. He looked at me in shock before he crossed his arms over his chest.

"Well, I feel so violated..." Will said quietly. I giggled to myself. "You seem to be in a cheery mood for someone who got totally plastered yesterday." I shrugged.

"A good night's rest, some aspirin and some food can do that to you," I said as I pulled a granola bar out from my bag and started to eat it.

"You're not supposed to eat in this class," he said.

"And? As long as the teacher doesn't find out, it's fine."

"Teacher!" Will called out. "She's eating in class!" he said as he waved his hand around and pointed at me. I looked at him in shock.

"What the fuck?!" I whispered harshly to him as I quickly swallowed the bite I had in my mouth.

"That's what you get for breaking rule number six," he said as he stuck his tongue out at me. I gaped at him.

"Fucking tattle-tale..." I muttered before the teacher came up to me.

"First, you're fifteen minutes late to my class. Then I find you eating in my class. Nicole, detention," he said as he handed me a slip.

"Yes, sir," I said quietly as I took the slip. As soon as his back was turned, I punched Will in the arm. He just laughed. Wait, what? Rewind that. He laughed. Will laughed! William Harper laughed! I don't think I ever actually heard him whole-heartedly laugh before. It was actually quite... nice. Too bad the only way I could hear him laugh was by me getting in trouble. Other than Will's surprisingly nice laugh, I heard another laugh behind me. I turned around and glared at Jason. Okay, now, his laugh was ugly and purely hideous to my ears. "Ha-ha! That's so funny, isn't it?!" I asked sarcastically. Jason's smile dropped before he coughed nervously. I turned back around and crossed my arms over my chest. "By the way, thanks for the aspirin this morning..." I muttered to Will as I put my detention slip away into the breast pocket of my shirt.

"Huh? Oh yeah, sure," he replied as he turned to face the front of the room. I glanced at him quickly before I looked ahead of me and finally paid attention to what was happening in class.




The yankee came into class late again. And for someone who cried herself to sleep last night, she was doing pretty well. Her eyes didn't even look as puffy as when I left the room this morning. And let me tell you, they were extremely puffy this morning.

And when she mentioned those rules I created, I couldn't possibly tell her I broke rule number four last night. Rule number four being no touching each other. Of course we've broken this rule before because I've had to carry her to her bed a few times since she was wasted. Never before though did I actually go out of my way and deliberately touch her, because I wanted to. I didn't even know why I did it in the first place yesterday. I didn't have to wipe her tears away, but I did. I cringed at the thought.

You know what was surprising though? The fact that she actually made me laugh. I never would have thought that that would happen. She bugged the hell out of me all the bloody time!

I shook my head to clear my thoughts. I glanced at her and then I glanced at Jason behind her. How could she stand to even be around him? From what she told me last night, he broke her heart. He broke her heart so bad, she absolutely hated him now. And from what she said, it sounded like it was really bad. I did a once over at Jason. He had the usual jock/douchebag feel to him. I had no idea how or why she even got with him in the first place. He didn't even look like her type.

Okay, what the fuck am I thinking? I don't even know her type!

I shook my head again and tried to focus on class.




The rest of second period passed without much happening as well as with third period. By fourth period PE, I was pretty much done for the day. I just wanted to crawl back into my bed and sleep.

We were playing volleyball again and I had to sit out again, which was fine with me. I felt like not doing anything anyways. I sighed. It was kind of boring just watching them play though. Sometimes, I wished I could play. Or that I had any athletic ability to begin with. I sighed again and leaned my head against the wall. I let my eyes rest for a while. I suddenly jerked though as I felt something cold on the side of my neck. I looked to the left of me and saw Will standing next to me, a can of juice held out for me.

"Here," he said as he leaned against the wall. He was so tall already, but when I was sitting on the floor, looking up at him, he was practically a giant. I stared up at him. "Take it," he said.

"Oh. T-thanks..." I stuttered. I grabbed the cold can from his hands. I tried to open the can, but I hurt my fingertips from trying to lift the tab. "Ow..." I muttered quietly.

"Give it here," Will said. I nodded and handed it back to him. He opened the can and gave it back to me.

"Thanks," I said again. I took a sip from the drink. I held the can with both hands, resting it on top of my knees.

As I took another sip, I glanced up at Will. He had his right leg perched up against the wall and he had his own can of juice in his hand. I noticed that his uniform shirt was slightly wrinkled with the first two buttons unbuttoned and his tie loosened. I watched as he brought the can to his lips and took a sip. As he went to move the can away from his mouth, he glanced down at me.

"What?" he asked. I looked away, embarrassed.

"Nothing," I said quickly.

"Hmm..." he hummed, taking another sip. I bit my lip nervously. I didn't know why I felt nervous around him all of a sudden.

"What are you doing here?" I asked him.

"Free period," he replied simply.

"Cool," I replied with a nod.

"What are you doing, sitting out for PE?"

"I bruise easily, so I can't play," I explained as I motioned to my arms.

"Oh, I see..." he said with a nod before he took another sip of his drink.

"So..." I started slowly. "Why are you being nice to me?"

"What? What are you talking about?"

"You're nice to me," I said. He shrugged as he slid down the wall and sat next to me.

After a few seconds, he finally replied. "No reason." I stared at him through my peripheral vision.

"Hmm..." I hummed as I mimicked him.

He sat against the wall, his leg pulled up enough that he could rest his forearms on the top of his knees. I noticed he was awfully close to me. Well, at least I thought he was. There was only about half a foot of space between us. And there we were, sitting in the gym on the side of the court, drinking juice together. We didn't say anything more, because there was nothing else to say.




Now that the yankee mentioned it, why was I nice to her? There was absolutely no reason for me to be nice to her. The reason why I hated her so much and was so mean to her was because of her, I didn't get to room with Ann.

I cringed. You know why I cringed? Because for the few minutes I was sitting with the yankee, I completely forgot that I had a girlfriend. I wanted to face palm myself for being so stupid. I had a girlfriend and the only thing I could think of at the moment was the yankee. I should have been ashamed of myself. I didn't know what came over me.

I suddenly stood up and scared the yankee in the process.

"What's wrong, Will?" the yankee asked as she looked up at me. I took a gulp of my juice before I replied.

"Nothing. I have to go," I said quickly before I turned around and walked away.

"Oh, okay..." I heard her say before I left the gym completely.

"What the fuck is wrong with me?!" I muttered to myself angrily.




I stared at the direction that Will just left to for a few seconds before I looked away and focused back at the game going on in front of me.

"Weird..." I muttered as I rested my chin on top of my knees, my drink off to the side next to me.