The First Cut is the Deepest

When fourth period ended, I changed back into my uniform and grabbed my bag. I looked to the floor as I walked out of the gym and I accidentally ran into someone on the way out.

"Oh, my bad-" I started as I looked up. And then I scoffed at what I saw. "Well, if it isn't the whore, Tracy Lewis..." I muttered as I gave her a once over. I was starting to wonder when I would see her again. I mean, it was bound to happen sometime.

"Oh, it's you..." she said in distaste.

"I could say the same to you..." I said with a disgusted look on my face. She had completely altered her uniform. She hiked up her skirt so far up, I could probably see her underwear if she bent over even a little bit. And for her shirt, she practically had half of the shirt unbuttoned, revealing a pink tank top and her animal print bra underneath. Hell, her untucked shirt was longer than her actual skirt. Way to change the once cute and innocent uniform into... that.

"What the hell are you doing here?" she asked me as she twirled a lock of her hair around her finger. I rolled my eyes at her, crossing my arms over my chest. I scoffed again.

"If you can't see, I go to this school. I've been here since the beginning of this year. Now, what the hell are you doing here?" I retorted.

"I transferred in here last week," she said matter-of-factly.

"Really now? And why's that?" I asked.

"Because of Jason. He wanted to move out here to this school and I said I'd move out with him. You wouldn't understand," she said, examining her hot pink painted nails.

"Oh, yeah, of course. I wouldn't understand. I could never understand how some bimbo could just blindly follow some... boy out of the country without a legitimate reason. Yeah, I wouldn't understand," I said. She gaped at me.

"Excuse me?!" she screeched.

"You heard me," I said. By now, fifth period had already started and all the people in the fifth period PE were staring at us. We were making a scene and honestly, I didn't care. "And Tracy? Tell me, why only now am I seeing you around school? Did you decide to be a tourist and only now did you find the time to actually come to school?"

"If you really want to know, I was settling into Jason's house," she said while she tilted her head up in pride.

"House? Ha! That prick couldn't possibly have his own house," I said, scoffing for the millionth time.

"His great aunt's house, but it's still a house."

"You're living with his aunt? Ha!" I said with another laugh as I turned around to leave. That's all I had to hear. As I walked away, I felt a hand suddenly yank me back.

"Don't judge me, bitch," she said harshly. I laughed again.

"Too late," I said. "Now, you better let go of my arm or you're gonna fucking regret what happens next," I said darkly. Her talons, which she liked to call nails, dug deeper into the flesh of my arm.

It's fucking on!

I thought as I ripped myself out of her grip. The next thing I knew, my fist made contact with Tracy's nose. She landed on the ground with a thump. Even though she was nearly half a foot taller than me and I weighed so much lighter than her and I probably was physically weaker than most people, I could take her. She wasn't too much that I couldn't handle. She was no match for me with her ‘Oh my gosh! My nail broke!’ mentality. The fact that rage fueled me did help though in my sudden bout of strength. Rage and anger always seemed to be good fuel for that.

I heard gasps from all around us as she rolled around the ground in pain. I could see blood dripping through her fingers. I turned away and made my way to class.

"Fuck!" she cursed. "You stupid bitch! This is exactly why Jason cheated on you! You're a psychotic bitch!" she yelled. I stopped in my tracks and turned around slowly. I looked down at her and she looked absolutely pathetic. She looked scared as she looked up at me. This bitch better be scared. I stooped down to her level and grabbed her by her shirt collar.

"You..." I started quietly. "...are you reason he cheated on me. You are the one who told him to cheat on me in the first place. You are the cause of all of this. You're the reason why your nose is bleeding. So don't fucking say that I'm the reason he cheated on me! You're the fucking reason!" I whispered angrily at her so no one else could hear. I wanted to hit her again. I really wanted to. I even had my fist up prepared to hit her again, but I slowly lowered it and stood up. She stopped flinching as soon as I turned around and walked away.

To be honest, punching that bitch in the face hurt my fist a bit, but it was absolutely exhilarating and worth it.




I quickly grabbed my fifth period book from my locker and made my way to class. On my way there, I ran into the yankee's ex-boyfriend, Jason.

"Oh hey, man. What's up?" he asked as he patted me on the back.

"Not much, mate. I'm sorry I can't chitchat for long. I'm going to be late for class," I said with a glance at my watch. I really didn't care if I was late for class or not. I just didn't want to be near this guy. I could just feel the prick aura emitting from him.

"Oh yeah. It's cool. I'll let you go then," he said. As I turned to walk away, he grabbed my arm. "Oh, um, quick question though."

"Um, sure..." I said uneasily as he let go of my arm.

"Did Nicole ever talk about me before I came here?" he asked hopefully. It sounded like he really wanted to get back together with her, despite what he did to her. It was going to be hard to break the truth to him.

"Sorry mate, she didn't say anything."

"Oh, I see. I understand," he said as he looked down. I looked at him for a few seconds before asking him a question of my own.

"Is she really worth it?" He shrugged his shoulders before he answered.

"Maybe," he replied.

"Maybe?" I asked in surprise.

"I'll let you in on a little secret," he said as he leaned in closer to me. "If she never caught me and my ex together, she would have given it up to me. And that's why she might be worth it. I'm trying again to nail her," he said with a sly smile. Never mind. He wasn't even close to being a good guy. And for a second there, I thought he was. I didn't realize that my hands had balled into fists. Before I could even think about what I was doing, I found myself landing punches onto Jason's face. He didn't even stand a chance against me. "What the fuck, man?!" he yelled as held up his hands to defend himself. Just as I was about to punch him for what seemed like the millionth time, I stopped and slowly lowered my fist as I finally realized what I had just done.

"I don't care if I get in trouble for hitting you, but if you dare tell anyone why I hit you, you're done," I threatened. There was no way in hell I wanted anyone to know I punched him so many times just because he said something about the yankee. That would completely tarnish my reputation. And the last thing I wanted was for the yankee to know why I hit him. "Got it?!" I asked loudly as I towered over him. He was shaking like a scared little puppy as he nodded frantically.

I scoffed at him and picked up my bag and book that I threw aside to the ground. I turned away and made my way to class. By now, there was already a crowd and they had already seen what had happened and they stuck around until the end. I had a feeling I was going to get in trouble and I started to wonder how long it would take for me to be sent to the headmaster's office.




I was pulled out in the middle of fifth period. A messenger came into the office and gave a note to the teacher, saying I had to go to the headmaster's office immediately. I didn't say a word as I packed up my things and left the room. I knew exactly why I was being called to the headmaster's office. I followed the messenger all the way to the office. The messenger told me to wait in one of the chairs of the lobby and the headmaster would be right with me.

I waited in a seat and twiddled my thumbs on my lap. I looked around the lobby in boredom. I saw a few pictures here and there on the wall of the school. Some recent, some as old as when this school first opened. Those pictures were in black and white.

"Headmaster Kingston will see you now," the secretary said. I nodded and said my thanks as I walked into his office.

So that's his name.

I thought to myself as I sat down in a chair in front of his desk. It was about time I found out his name. As I looked around the office at the pictures and plagues on the wall, I figured that his ancestors first opened this school, hence his last name and the school's name, Kingston.

"We will start shortly as soon as another student arrives," he said as he sat in his chair. I looked at him in confusion.

"Another student?" I questioned. Right at that moment, the door opened and someone walked in and sat in the empty chair to the left of me. I was shocked to see it was Will. "Will, why are you here? What'd you do?" I asked. He leaned back in his chair.

"I could ask you the same thing," he replied.

"So do you both know why you're here? Ms. Greene, Mr. Harper?" Headmaster Kingston asked us. I looked at Will as he looked at me.

I turned towards the headmaster. "Well, I'm here, because I punched the new girl, Tracy Lewis, in the nose," I said. From my peripheral vision, I saw Will look at me, his interest peaked.

"And broke her nose, I might add," the headmaster said. I looked at him in shock.

"I did?" I asked.

"You did."

"Oh," I said. I didn't think I hit her that hard, but I guess I did. Good job me! The headmaster stood up from his chair and turned his back to us, looking out the window. I looked to the left of me when I saw movement from Will. He had his head resting on his left palm while his right hand was between us, palm facing up. I looked at him in question.

"I'm giving you props for breaking her nose, so high five my hand, before I regret it..." Will whispered to me. I looked at him in shock, but quickly and quietly gave him a high five. The headmaster turned back to face us and we straightened in our seats.

"And you, Mr. Harper. Do you know why you're here?" the headmaster asked as he turned back around to face the window again. Will licked his bottom lip before he replied.

"I punched the new bloke, Jason whatever his last name is, in the face. Multiple times." Without even questioning him, I held out my hand, palm up. Will, without even questioning it either, gave me a high five back. Headmaster Kingston turned back to us and sat back in his chair.

"Jason Smith," he corrected Will.

"Yeah, him," Will said. I couldn't stop myself from grinning that I had to cover my mouth with my hand. Will just got into a fight with Jason! And from the looks of it, I assumed he won since I didn't see a scratch or a single hair out of place on him.

"You both are in big trouble. Both Tracy and Jason have a broken nose." Without hesitation, both Will and I high fived each other out of Headmaster Kingston's view. "You're both suspended for a week," he said as he stood up once again. "You may leave now," he said. We both stood up and didn't question it as we left his office.

As soon as his office door was closed, we both burst out into laughter. Will was actually letting himself go and laughing along with me. I clutched my stomach while we laughed and walked through the lobby to leave. On our way out, we passed by Jason and Tracy who were sitting on the chairs. Their noses were different shades of black and blue and they were incredibly swollen. They looked like absolute shit. And then Will and I continued laughing again all the way back to our dorm room. I mean, we were suspended anyway. We might as well go back to our room.



It had been about three days since we got suspended. Since I got a detention on the same day as I got suspended. The teacher told me I didn't have to serve it, because I was already suspended anyway. Knowing me though, I was bound to get another detention soon.

Anyway, Will and I have just been hanging out in our room the whole time. Annabella and Chris would always visit us during lunch and after school though, so it wasn't so bad. I was pretty occupied though since I now had my laptop. A few days ago, my mom finally sent me my laptop I had been telling her to send me before I even arrived here in England. So after more than a month already in England, I finally got it. Silly parents. Always out to make their children suffer.

While I was checking my email, I heard a knock on the door. I glanced up from my bed at Will and he was on the couch watching TV. And from the looks of it, he wasn't going to budge.

"Oh, don't get up, Will. I got it," I said sarcastically as I got up and made my way to the door.

"Cool..." he muttered, not taking his eyes off the TV. I rolled my eyes.

"It's probably Chris," I said before I opened the door. I opened the door, expecting Chris, but it was far from him. "Oh, it's you," I said as I attempted to close the door on Jason's black and blue face. He stuck his foot through the door and I purposely closed the door hard on his foot. He gasped in pain and pulled his foot back. I took that chance to close the door all the way. I leaned my back against the door and took a deep breath.

"Who was it?" Will asked with a yawn.

"Who do you think?" I replied.

"Ohh. Sucks," he said as he continued to watch TV. I rolled my eyes at him again before I heard Jason knock on the door once more. I grunted and opened the door.

"Seriously, Jason, what do you want?" I spat at him angrily.

"I already told you," he said calmly.

"That's a bullshit excuse," I said as I noted the cast on his broken nose.

"It's true."

"No, it's not. It's a bullshit excuse. You're trying to use me again," I whispered the last sentence to him.

"I'm not, I swear. I really want to start over again," he said as he reached over and grabbed my hand. As soon as his hand touched mine, I moved it away from him as if it was fire.

"Don't even start, Jason, because it never even really started between us. It's not gonna work this time. I'm not gonna fall for it and I'm not gonna let you take advantage of me. I'm done with you," I finished as I closed the door on his face again.

And I'm done crying over you.

I thought as I recalled the time I cried about him with Chris. I shook my head.

"Do you think you'd ever take him back?" Will asked me while he turned off the TV. I scoffed.

"That prick? Yeah, right!" I said as I crawled back into my bed and went back on my laptop. "He probably caught something from that bitch," I vented. I saw Will nod in my peripheral vision.

"So I heard something about the both of you," he started while he stood up from the couch and laid down on his bed. I sighed as I stopped typing on my laptop.

"What'd you hear?"

"I heard that he was only with you to have sex with you. And that's the only reason why he's back, because he failed last time," Will explained. My jaw dropped at what he said.

"That fucking asshole! What is his deal?! What is wrong with him?! He just needs to go the fuck away!" I said as I angrily typed on my laptop. I was sending an email to Erin about all of this.

"Well, that's what I heard," he said with another shrug.

"Knowing that douchebag, it's true," I said. I finished typing up the email and sent it to Erin. I signed out of my email and closed my laptop. I set it on the bedside table next to me and grabbed the book in the drawer. I took a deep breath to calm myself before I opened the book to the page to where I left off and continued reading. This was my typical day since we got suspended. I would wake up, get ready, go on my laptop for a bit, read for a while, watch a little TV, go back to my laptop, do a bit of homework so I wasn’t too far behind and go to sleep. Oh, and of course, I would eat. I would eat a lot. And Will? He pretty much did the same thing, minus the whole eating so much. He had his own laptop tucked away in his own bedside table. His laptop was better and nicer than mine, but he was a rich ass, so that was expected. I heard another knock on the door. I sighed. "Can you get that? If it's Jason again, I'm gonna stab him with one of my heels," I said. Will scoffed and got up to open the door. He opened the door and Chris walked in with Annabella behind him.
"Hi, Nicole!" Chris said as he jumped on my bed.

"Hi to you too, Chris..." Will muttered as he rolled his eyes. He turned to Annabella instead and gave her a peck on the lips. "Hi, honey," he said to her.

"Hello, baby. Miss me?" she asked, a smile plastered on her face.

"Of course," he replied. She entered the room and sat on Will's bed.

"Hi, Nicole. How are you doing today?" she asked politely.

"Hey, Annabella. Not much today, just bored," I said with a shrug. She nodded in understanding as Will sat next to her. I turned to Chris as he started speaking.

"You're so lucky you got suspended!" he said.

"Uh, okay," I said with a laugh.

"I wish I could just laze around all day!" he exclaimed as he laid on my bed, his feet dangling off the edge.

"It gets kind of boring though," I said.

"So? I'd find something to do," he said.

"If you say so," I said, going back to reading my book.

"This is all you do," Chris stated.

"What? Read? Well, yeah," I replied, turning a page in my book.

"You're a dork," he said.

"But you love me, right?" I asked as I set my book down and smiled at him. He sighed before he replied.

"Yes, but still..." he said, a small smile on his face. I laughed and continued reading.

As I was reading though, I thought back to a few days ago when Hayley confided in me about Chris. I pursed my lips before I put my book down. By now, Will and Annabella were sitting on the couch, watching TV. I turned to Chris.

"I have to talk to you," I whispered.

"O-kay..." he said slowly. "Why are we whispering?" he whispered back.

"Because it's personal and I don't want them to hear," I said, nodding my head to Will and Annabella on the couch.

"Okay, what it is it then?" he asked. I took a deep breath before I spoke up.

"What happened with Hayley?" I asked. Chris moved back from me as he rubbed his neck.

"Nicole, not this-" he started.

"Yes, this!" I exclaimed quietly. "What happened?" I asked seriously. He sighed before he whispered low.

"I went up to her a few days ago and I told her I couldn't return her feelings. Okay? Happy?" he asked and I smacked his arm.

"I am not happy and neither is she!" I exclaimed a bit too loudly. Both Will and Annabella looked over at us quickly before turning their attention back to the TV. "Why'd you do it?" I asked once their eyes were back on the TV. I kind of already knew the reason why, but I wanted to hear it from him.

"Because," he started.

"Because what?" I asked.

"Because... I have my eyes on someone else..." he muttered quietly. I gasped.

It's true!

I thought. "Who?!" I exclaimed. I was honestly curious and I wanted to know who he could possibly like.

"I can't tell you. It's too awkward," he said as his cheeks turned pink.

"Come on. Who am I going to tell?"

"It's not who you're going to tell. It's who the person is."

"Are you ashamed of her or something?"

"No, no, no," Chris said quickly. "She's just... amazing," he said as he crashed onto my bed, dreamily.

"Really?" I asked. He nodded as he looked up at me.

I rubbed my chin in thought. It was going to be hard to tell Hayley this. I wasn't even sure if I should tell her at all. Then I started to wonder who it could be. I've seen him talk to other girls before, but I've rarely seen him actually hang out with any. The only girl he actually hung out with was, well, me. It couldn't be me though, right? I shook my head.

It's not me. It's got to be somebody else and I have to find out who.

I thought as I got out of my bed. "You're not going to pressure me into any more details?" Chris asked.

"Nah. There's plenty of time for that later," I said with a cheeky smile. "I'm hungry. Are you hungry?" I asked as I walked to the kitchen. I heard him sigh as he followed me.

As I cooked some food for Chris and I, I started quietly singing to myself.

"Wow. You're really good," Chris suddenly said.

"At cooking?" I asked.

"At singing," he clarified.

"Aw, shucks. You're embarrassing me," I said with a goofy grin.

"I didn't know you sang."

"Yeah, it's just a little hobby of sorts, you know? I'm usually not even aware I'm doing it," I said with a laugh. "My brother loves it when I sing," I said.

"You have a brother?" he asked.

"Yeah, a younger brother. His name is Eric. He's six."

"Oh, that's cool. Have you ever thought of pursuing a musical career?" I shook my head.

"Nah. Like I said, it's just a hobby of mine. I don't plan on making it a permanent thing."

"Why not?"

"It's not my thing," I said. "I wouldn't be able to do it. Too much pressure."

"You'd really make it far though."

"Psh. I doubt it. I don’t think I’m very good at it. It's alright though. I'm fine with what I'm going to do in the future."

"Which is?" I paused what I was doing and turned to him, pointing the spatula in Chris' face.

"I'm not entirely sure yet," I said before I turned back to the food. "But I know it's not singing," I said as I finished making the food.

"Wow..." he muttered. I set the food on two plates and gave one plate to Chris. I sat down next to him on a stool and we ate our food, talking about whatever things that popped into our heads.