About a Girl

I yawn escaped my lips before I opened my eyes. I didn’t want to face the day knowing that it was going to be probably the most difficult one I would face in a long time; but then a pair of long arms tightened their grip on my waist and some lips attached themselves to my neck and I couldn’t help myself but open those sorry eyes of mine and smile, “Good morning, Alex.”

“Good morning to you too,” He buried his heard into my heap of morning hair and yawned. “We got to get up, it’s a quarter ‘til noon and Will wanted you at one, I think, to take you to the show.”

I groaned as I could hear the distaste in Alex’s voice. This was horrible, I thought. How could I break the news to Bilvy that no matter what false hope I gave him the other night – I was done? Alex loves me and well, damn it, I love him. With him everything just feels so right and I don’t have to feel rushed or have to get a headache every other day because of him. It’s simple, not complex.

I just don’t know how I’m going to break Will’s heart, again.

This thought struck me and kept me staring at the ceiling of me and Alex’s bunk for several minutes straight until Alex broke my concentration by climbing out of the bunk and leaving the curtain open. I decided that I might as well have it and get ready for ‘the big show’. Pun intended.

I dragged myself up and out of the bunk and into the bathroom to shower and brush my teeth. I tried to make everything go by fast by doing not taking more than half an hour to get completely ready, and I guess that’s why before I knew it, Alex was standing up from our makeshift breakfast of Cheerios to answer the door and I was choking on a spoonful as I sat there on the couch watching Will and Alex glare at each other. I shook my head and sighed as I stood and put the bowl in the sink and gave Alex a kiss goodbye and followed Will outside.

Walking towards the gate, I took a deep breath and grabbed Will’s hand and turned him around to face me, “Look, Bill we need to talk –“

“Addie, let’s just go enjoy the concert, okay? I know how much you love Green Day and how much you’ve always wanted to see them, we’ll talk later,” He squeezed my hand and just held it gingerly as we continued to walk to the cab that was waiting.

[>>>]

Upon arriving to the arena, we were ushered backstage quickly, I was used to this – well, if I was with the band that was performing, but now that I was actually coming to backstage to watch, hangout and meet the band that’s performing. I am feeling… So much; excitement, slight embarrassment, self-doubt, and fear.

I swear I was sweating bullets when Bill and I came to a door labeled ‘Dressing Room – Green Day’. I looked up at Bill and he was as calm as a cucumber and that relaxed me as the door swung opened and revealed a smiling Billie Joe Armstrong.

“Hey, Will,” He nodded at Bilvy in recognition and then turned his head towards me. “And you must be Will’s girlfriend, Addie? Come in.”

With a tug of Will’s hand I was dragged into the dressing room and I tried to take it all in as I tried to ignore the fact that Billie Joe just called me Will’s girlfriend – Which I am not. I’m Alex’s girlfriend.

I tried to take an opportunity to speak and correct Billie, “It’s so amazing to meet you, Billie, but I’m not –“

“Addie’s a little freaked out over meeting Mike, Tre and you; so can you excuse us for a second?” Will asked Billie as there was a knock on the door and Mike Dirnt poked his head in and called for Billie.

“Oh sure, I’ve got to go to sound check anyway. Come out to the stage when you’re done talking,” And with that Billie Joe left.

And as I watched him leave, I had the feeling that I really didn’t want him to go and it was not the simple wanting of a fan wanting her favorite rock musician to stick around – This was the deep wanting of someone who was scared to be alone with the person that she was currently left alone with; this was so true that I nearly called out for Billie but then thought better of it because I thought I was just being stupid.

But then, when am I ever just being stupid?

Will grabbed my shoulders and pushed me against the wall so hard and so fast that I didn’t have time to brace myself for it and I was sure my entire back would be bruised.

“Now, you listen to me, Addison,” He breathed heavily into face. “You are not going to tell Billie Joe the truth, and you’re not going to go back to Alex, you hear me?”

By now Will’s grip on my shoulders were starting to numbing my arms and I could barely move my head but as Will asked again if I ‘head him’ and he shook my body, I nodded feebly and he let me fall to the carpeted floor.

“Come out to the stage after you clean yourself up,” Will said emotionless as he turned away from and walked out the door, closing it firmly behind him.

I shook violently as I cried and sniffled. I couldn’t believe William did that to me or maybe I can. He has always been unpredictable. But I am not going to stay here unprotected. I reached into my bag and grabbed my phone.

[>>>]

Hours later as I stood still a little shaken from what had happened earlier in the dressing room, I was calmed by the fact that I was going to be saved from Will as soon we got back to the buses. I had a weird feeling though, as Will squeezed me tight as Green Day finished off their last song of the night and past by us to go cool down in that very same dressing room from earlier. And just like I knew we were going to, we followed suite behind them but as we entered them room I quickly wrapped my arms around Will’s waist.

“Bilvy, let’s go back to the bus,” I said it directly to him in a voice that I hoped was seductive as I moved my arms from his waist to his neck. He looked clearly taken back but nodded instantly and quickly said goodbye to the three nearly wasted rock stars.

The cab ride back though, was a challenge, I have to admit that. It was like Will was going to rip my clothes off right then in front of the Cabbie, but thankfully; I was able to restrain him.

“Come on, let’s go,” Will urged as we got dropped off at the gates. I nodded halfheartedly as I tried to keep my distance from him but he just wouldn’t have it. Will kept our fingers firmly interlocked which allowed only so much space to walk away from him but I knew I had to separate myself from him as soon as we were within a few feet from The Academy’s bus.

“Will, stop,” I quit walking as we stood in front of the bus and I looked up at him and as I did, he let go of my hand to stroke my face – That’s when everything happened at once. I think I might’ve seen everything double but I knew I was safe at least because I was being cuddled in against a warm hoodie that smelled like alcohol and I knew that I was where I wanted to be. I was cuddled in Alex Gaskarth’s arms.