Bottom of the Blackest Hole

I knew I should be sleeping, resting my energy for tomorrow, but I just couldn’t. I didn’t know why. Maybe it was the fact that now I actually notice Josh snoring slightly next to me. I didn’t know why I didn’t notice before. I mean, he’s right next to me.

I lied flat on my back and stared up at the bed canopy ceiling. Today went by quickly. After I realized what Josh was doing – kissing me – I pushed him away suddenly, stomp on his foot for god knows what reason, and stalked off. Now, whenever I see him, which is pretty recently since we were in the same room, he would always smirk that sly thing. He knew what affect he had when his lips touched mine. He was satisfied and pleased. The bastard.

Any other than that, everything was normal. We called room service, ordered food, and watched movies until midnight.

I let out a loud sigh then stiffened when he stirred. I relaxed later when I saw he just turned and faced me. I flickered my eyes to his face and turned to face him also. The bed was huge. We were a foot apart. I closed my eyes for the millionth time, hoping that this time they’ll be closed for eight more hours. No such luck.

I slowly opened my eyes again and couldn’t help but giggled eerily at how Josh’s hair look. It was sticking everywhere. Then I just downright laughed for no reason. He didn’t even move. He must be close to dead. I chuckled a little more. That was just it. I was delirious. I need to sleep, so sleep!

I had the sudden urge to poke his nose or…lick his cheek. Like I said, delirious or maybe just really crazy. I wriggled my body closer to him. We were now mere inches apart. My next move surprised the hell out of me. I leaned in closer.

Then I kissed him. On the lips.

I did it gently, softly. He didn’t respond but I wasn’t surprised, but when he did I was. He groaned a little and I knew he was half awake. One of my hands cupped his cheek and I traced them with my thumb. He let out a content sigh.

“Dixie,” he breathed. That’s when time seemed to have freeze. My lips weren’t moving now but didn’t move away. My hand lay motionlessly on his smooth cheek. I suddenly feel cold. Very, very cold.

Josh seemed to be wide awake now. His eyes popped out widely at me, probably guessing my next move. When I didn’t do anything he said quietly, “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to,” his mouth moved against mine as he apologized. I just gave him a blank look, moved my hand then turned around and scooted far from him. We were probably more than two feet apart.

Was I hurt? Hecks yeah. But was I mad? Not even the teeniest bit. I could somewhat understand why he even said her name. One, hopefully, he didn’t do it on purpose. He was only half awake. Two, he, obviously, wasn’t over her. He must love her so much. I curled my legs so they were up to my chest and hugged it.

I slowly closed my eyes just as I saw a ray of light shine through the room. Josh dimmed the light and I could feel the bed move. I felt a soft pressure on my shoulder and then a gentle shake.

“Bailey?” he said quietly. I didn’t respond except for squeezing my already closed eyes. He must have thought I was asleep because he let out a sigh. Then all of a sudden, he slipped his hand underneath me and lifted me up so I was faced to him and pressed against his side. I didn’t know why he did it. But it felt nice to be close to him.

I felt his touch my cheek. “Shit,” he muttered. He brushed my cheek again. Then I realize something. I was crying. Am I still crying? I didn’t know. And to tell you the truth, I didn’t really care.

I could feel him stretch, probably to turn off the light, and then he scooted down and hugged me tightly. Even if he called me his ex-lover’s name, I quickly finally fell asleep peacefully in his arms.

--

My eyes flashed opened and I was met with lightness. My eyes adjusted to the light and I could see that I was in the hotel room.

I felt sticky and disgusting. I tried to brush the sweat off my forehead, but some force was keeping me tucked tight beside it. I glanced up and saw him sleeping soundly. We were faced each other. My curled arms were the only thing in between us. Both of his arms were wrapped securely around me. I remembered what happened last night and inwardly groan. It was my entire fault. Why did I have to kiss him while he was sleeping? Maybe if I didn’t, I wouldn’t feel embarrass that he called me his ex-lover’s name.

He stirred and moved a little. His arms around me loosened. I carefully lifted them up. When he was entirely off of me, I skidded to the bathroom and quietly closed the door.

I started the shower then stopped mid way. Was that…a bubble bath? I giddily began filling the tub with water then poured the strawberry scented soapy liquid in the tub, as it directed. Soon small bubbles began to flood the bath tub. I quickly turned the water off, stripped out off my pajamas (they were still the shirt that I stole from Josh), and slowly slid into the tub. It felt so nice.

I couldn’t help but let a smile grace my face as I played with the bubbles. I never took a bubble bath before. At home, I had to shower quickly, afraid that my dad might come in and decided to drown me. I cringed at the thought.

I grabbed a nearby pink, new loofah and began cleaning my arms. Just then, the door slowly swung open, showing an image of a very sleepy looking Josh. He didn’t see me. I think. He walked towards the toilet, lifted the seat up-

“Hey!” I shouted. He blinked once. Twice. Turned to me with half closed eyes. Turned back towards the toilet and slowly pulled down his blue, plaid pajama pants. I panicked. Before they were down his waist, I threw the loofah I was holding at his head. That seemed to get him out of his reverie. He spluttered a little, pulled up his pants quickly, and turned to look at me with wide scared eyes. That looked disappeared all at once, once his eyes scanned over me.

He must’ve remembered what happened last night. His eyes quickly traveled back to mine.

Cue the awkward silence.

“Um,” he started, “I’m sorry about last night.”

I looked down at his feet, not being able to look at him in the eyes.

“No,” I began, “I shouldn’t have taken advantage of you when you were sleeping,” I muttered. I thought I heard a scoff so I looked up.

“I don’t like how you said that,” he said, crossing his arms.

“Excuse me?” I furrowed my eyebrows.

“As if you don’t know. ‘Taking advantage of me’,” he mocked.

I gave him the ‘are-you-fucking-kidding-me-look’. “Is your ego actually…bruised?” I asked incredulously.

He rolled his eyes before they dropped down to my chest. I quickly covered myself up with bubbles. Or tried to. They’re hardly anymore. Instead, I sank further down. His eyes never left me. I glared at him when he didn’t stop staring.

“Stop it!” I shrieked. His eyes snapped back to mine, the end of his lips pulled upward into a smirk, and then he strolled out.

And just like that. Everything was back to normal.