Dark Shadows

"why would you believe someone who hurt you? I love you Malia, you're my best friend I've never not once hurt you," he said to her, "Love doesn't have to equal pain, he was manipulating you - using you hurting you because he thought he could get away with it, and I will kill him before he ever steps a foot near you again." he said to her.

---

Dinah laid back down and wiped her eyes then slowly began to fall asleep - she felt so drained all the time.

I looked at him in confusion. "You love me?" I asked slowly. "But I don't want to hurt you." I said, shaking my head. "He didn't love me? I don't want to be sad anymore, but I don't deserve happiness." I mumbled, messing with my braces.

---

He came out to see her sleeping, drying his hair and finding some clothes. He was mentally exhausted.

"I love you, and love meanings doing what is good for the person you care about; hitting and raping you wasn't good for you," he said to her softly.

I sighed a little, looking at my hands. "I was only there for his pleasure. I deserved it when he hit me because I wasnt fast enough or I messed up." I murmured with a shrug. "I don't know what love means anymore. I'm sorry I can't say I love you back."

"You never messed up he conditioned you to to what he wanted, but he is gone now, and he will be for a long while. Once the case is appealed before he gets out I doubt he'd ever get out," he said to her, "You can trust me right? You know I'd never lie to you or try to hurt you, I will do everything in my power to keep you safe," she said to her lightly.

I shook my head a little. "I don't know who to trust. I thought he loved me and he hurt me but he told me to trust him. I don't trust anyone." I said honestly, looking at my hands. I didn't know if my words would upset him but what I said was true. I trusted and got hurt. I didn't want to trust or love ever again.

@ musicalpanda
He sighed a little and rubbed his face,"If you need me I'll be in my room," he murmured lightly,"try and sleep,"

I stared at the floor, not knowing how much time I had passed. When I looked up he was gone. The clock on the kitchen said 1:23. For some reason it was vaguely amusing. I fell asleep sometime later, not sure how long it had been.



"You're so fucking useless!" He yelled, throwing the plate of food at me. I felt the plate connect with my head and I felt a dull pain before my head began to throb.

"I'm sorry..." I mumbled, immediately stooping to clean up the mess. My head throbbed and I lost balance, falling to the ground instead. I was weak, I hadn't eaten for three days.

"Get up!" He shouted, swinging his foot into my side. "You're so fucking lucky I love you, because no other man would deal with your shit." He said, his eyes narrowed as he watched me attempt to stand back up.

"I am lucky." I murmured, giving a weak smile as I looked around for a rag to clean with. "I'll clean up." I said, bending over to clean.

"I want it done in 5 minutes then come to bed." He muttered, turning for the bedroom.

I ached, I was in so much pain. But I attempted to clean fast enough so I didn't anger him.

"MALIA! I SAID FIVE MINUTES!" I heard him shout, making me begin to shake. I didn't move fast enough.

Though I was aware it was a dream, I couldn't move. It felt so real, I couldn't make myself wake up. I couldn't make myself stop crying. I felt like he was here and he was going to hit me again for my mistakes.

Jongdae heard screaming and jumped up from his spot beside the couch in the recliner,"Malia, Malia it was a bad dream he isn't here," he said to her.

---

Dinah woke up some time later, she chewed on the inside of her cheek then went to get dressed so they could go to their doctor appointment. "Yixing," she said standing in the doorway to the guest bedroom where he usually slept now. "It's almost time for our appointment,"

He rolled over and groaned. "What? Which one? Do I need to come with you? Just go." He said, rolling back over, his back facing her.

---

I felt someone around me, making me jump. I looked around seeing Jongdae and making me confused. What was I doing at Jongdae's house? I suddenly remembered earlier today, making me look around. I was still shaking and I put my face in my knees, wanting to go back to a corner. "He isn't here?" I asked, looking around.

She chewed on her bottom lip,"I..okay," she said softly and walked down the stairs grabbing her purse and keys before walking to her car, feeling a bit dejected - he had agreed to go with her the day before, maybe he did it to shut her up.

---

He shook his head,"No, he is in jail, and he will be for five years," he told her softly as he looked at her.

He rolled over, rubbing his face. He heard her leave and was slightly surprised she let him just get away with staying. He got up, pulling on some clothes so he could go out. He didn't intend on going out to see her, but he had an idea.

---

I sighed a little, looking around. I grabbed the blanket, pulling it around me. "Why aren't you in your room?" I asked, holding it up to my ears.

@ musicalpanda
"I heard you, I wanted to make sure you were okay," he said to her softly.

I nodded a little, putting my pillow over my head. "I'm scared." I admitted, looking at the floor. "It felt like he was here."

When Dinah got back from the doctors she had a permanent smile plastered on her face,"Yixing?" she said, "I'm home, I have news!" she said as she held the folder in her hands and went to put her things down in the kitchen.

---

He nodded,"It's okay to be scared, what he did to you was fucked up Malia," he told her gently as he looked at her. "I'm not going to let him hurt you," he murmured to her as he licked his lips. "Do you want anything to drink?" he asked/

I nodded slowly. "I...really like tea." I said with a shrug. "If he's in jail, and he isn't coming back, can I eat whatever I want?" I asked him slowly, looking at him as he walked.

---

Yixing stood in the kitchen with a folder of his own, waiting for her. He knew now what he needed to do. While he was avoiding it, He had realized that it needed to be done. "I want a divorce."

She felt her heart stop in her chest, and she stared at him for what seemed like forever. "but I.. I have news we can make this work," she said to him as she stammered trying not to cry right now - she couldn't be stressed, not when she was pregnant. "Yixing I'm pregnant the doctor showed me scans, she said that we're both healthy," she told her softly, "this one doesn't have heart problems like the others did ... we can make this work please," she bgged.

---

He nodded,"Of course, eat whatever you want whenever you want," he smiled at her lightly.

He shook his head. "I'm finished. I can't go through this an eighth time." He said with a sigh, rubbing his face. "I'll give you time, but I want them signed by the end of the week. We can start splitting things up in the meantime."

---

I nodded a little, playing with the blanket. "Did I make you sad?" I asked him quietly. "When I told you I didn't love you?"

She looked at him broken then walked over grabbing hte packet from him then signed it,"I don't want anything from you, and when this baby is born and he or she is perfectly healthy I want you to sign over your rights because you didn't give him or her the chance they derserved," she muttered softly as she tossed the folder with the baby information on the table. She walked upstairs to what was no longer her room, she grabbed her suitcase then started packing her things into it.

Funny how you could pack four years of memories on two suitcases and one tote bag.

---

He sighed."Yes," he admitted,"Because I love you, and I'd never dream of hurting you. He was wrong Malia - he should have never laid a hand on you," he told her. "He never loved you," he told her honestly.

I looked at him for a second. From what I remembered, love was a serious thing. You had family love and then there was love love. Which love was it? "You love me or are in love with me?" I asked to clarify, not knowing what it quite meant either way. I didn't know what love felt like or how to love someone back.

---

He sighed a little, rubbing his face roughly as he leaned over the counter. He couldn't take it anymore. He wouldn't go through it another time. Not to be heartbroken once again.