Come Find Me

Will had tried to stay awake, but he drifted off to sleep anyways. He couldn't help it. He was warm, comfortable, and felt safe there in her bed. He didn't want up through the night, but he did end up having a rather restless sleep, despite the good situation he found himself in physically. He had dream after dream of horrible outcomes of what was to come of him and Margot's relationship. He died in one, she died before he got back from war in another, she'd moved on by the time he got back... It was a loop.

He was still sleeping when Margot woke up.

@ poe dameron

Margot smiled a little when she spotted William still asleep beside her, and despite thinking it would probably be a good idea to get up and dressed and to make him something to eat for when he woke up she remained in bed, snuggling back into his arms with a content little sigh. They didn't have long before he had to leave, and she wanted to savor every little moment she could get with him before he had to go back to the war. Besides, if she got up now it might wake him, and he was on holiday and deserved to sleep in.

She pressed a small kiss to his cheek as she nestled back into his arms, adjusting the blankets around them before closing her eyes as if to drift off to sleep again, the steady fall of the rain against the windows and William's steady breathing lulling her back into a light sleep.

An hour or so later she woke with a start, having had a nightmare about William getting killed in battle, the poor girl jolting up in bed with a gasp, frantically looking for William to make sure he was alright.

Will was immediately standing when Margot woke with a start. Probably the fact that he was not used to battle, and any sudden noise or movement meant to be on your guard - that it was time to fight. He probably looked angry until he realized where he was, and what had happened. His facial expression softened quickly and he sighed. Will sat back down on the bed, and ran a hand through his rather bed head-y mess of hair.

"Are you alright?" He asked, looking at her. "Did you have a bad dream?"

He hoped he hadn't startled her too much with jumping out of bed and looking rather cross. He wasn't mad at her. Angry was just his default face once the fighting started.

@ poe dameron

Margot had relaxed once she'd spotted him alive and well, and had honestly barely noticed that he seemed rather cross, quickly wrapping her arms around him once he'd sat back down, pressing her face into the crook of his neck as she gave a little nod in answer.

"..I worried you might be... Gone.." she whispered softly, hoping that he understood what she meant, not really wanting to directly talk about dreaming about his death. "I was scared.. I'm sorry if I started you."

"I'm here," Will said giving her back a small pat. Though he knew he wouldn't be for long. Nine more days, then he was back to the front. He felt his stomach gurgle, thankfully moving him out of the dark thoughts he was threatening to let consume him. "Shall we make breakfast? I can help, I wouldn't want you doing more than you already have for us soldiers."

@ poe dameron

Margot nodded a bit and pulled back with a frown as she looked up at him, sliding out of bed to pull on her robe before heading toward the door. "It's alright, I can manage.. I like cooking, helps me take my mind off of things.." she murmured, offering him a faint smile before heading downstairs to the kitchen.

As she began to pull out eggs and bread for their breakfast she let her mind wander, a little frown on her lips as she worked. Maybe she'd made a mistake in asking him to give them a chance while he was there.. He'd be gone in a little over a week, and she knew he wouldn't promise her anything no matter what happened, and it was likely she'd never see him again. She let out a little sigh, deciding that after they had their breakfast that they should talk about what they ought to do given their situation.

Something was wrong. He hadn't known her long, but she wasn't good at hiding when something was upsetting her. Will stayed in bed for a small bit longer, weighing his options. He could play dumb and wait for her to talk to him, or he could face the problem head on. He was never one to hide behind feigned ignorance, so he decided to ask her what was bothering her.

He stood up and wandered into the kitchen, still shirtless, and still with messy hair.

"Is everything okay?" he asked, leaning against the counter beside the stove. "Correct me if I'm wrong, but you seem upset."

@ poe dameron

Margot frowned a little as she turned to look at him, unable to hide how upset she looked. She couldn't lie to him, and knew that they had to talk about it, but she wasn't sure exactly how to say what she felt she needed to say.

"I... Maybe you were right, that.. that this was a bad idea.." She admitted softly, focusing her attention back on the pan of bacon she was cooking. "You'll leave in nine days, and I'll stay here, and you've already made it clear that you won't promise anything about the future, so I don't... I just don't want to waste your time.." She frowned, glancing up at him for a moment before her eyes moved back to the stove in front of her.

"I know that you haven't made any plans for after the war, but I know that those plans, whenever they are made, won't include coming back here.. And that's fine, you have your mother and sister to take care of, I can't expect or ask you to do something as silly as come back here when you haven't been home in years... So I think it'd be best if after breakfast you go back to the barn, and we don't talk to each other anymore.."

Will wasn't sure how to feel. On one hand, he agreed. He couldn't promise her anything. He was going to war and she was going to stay right where she was. He was convinced he wasn't going to come home at all, and ending things was probably best for her, and possibly for him. On the other hand, he was angry. When it was his idea to not go any further, to just stop their stupid flirting, she said she wanted to just see where it took them. But now, after she'd basically said she was falling in love with him, she decided it had to end? Where was the logic in that?

He nodded slowly, his arms across his chest. He didn't want to get cross with her, it was better that she was honest, but he couldn't help but be a little irritated, and rather upset. He had a feeling the change of heart at to do with more than her not wanting to waste his time, but he didn't have the energy or self control to press the issue without getting emotional about it.

"Yeah, alright," Will settled. "I'll just take my breakfast to go, if it's alright with you."

He gave her a curt smile, grabbing a piece of toast as it popped out of the toaster, before leaving the kitchen. He walked into the bathroom where his clothed had been left. They were still kind of damp. Will held the piece of toast in his mouth as he quickly shoved the wrinkled, damp piece of clothing onto his body, and without saying anything else, he left the house.

"You're a moron, William," Will mumbled to himself. He should have just steered clear as soon as he thought she was worth chasing. He knew it wasn't going to end well, regardless of when or how it ended. "A complete idiot, you are."

@ poe dameron

Margot felt terrible, and any appetite she had disappeared as she realized he was angry with her, turning off the stove as she turned to look at him, biting her lip worriedly. "I'm sorry, William... I really am. You were right yesterday, I should have listened to you. Please don't think that I've changed my mind because of anything you did, I just... I-I'd rather lose you now when it won't hurt as much.." She admitted softly as she followed him slowly through the house, hoping he'd at least listen to her and understand that she was just trying to fix her mistake.

She started to speak again when he came out of the bathroom, but when he practically shoved past her she fell silent, freezing in her spot as she watched him leave, biting her lip to keep herself from crying before she turned to clean up any signs that he'd been in the house, putting the clothes he'd borrowed away before crawling back into bed, feeling like she might be sick if she tried to do anything else. She felt awful, and she worried she'd made a mistake in sending him away, but knew that if she hadn't she'd only feel worse later.

She was still in bed that afternoon when her parents returned home, her mother promptly scolding her for wasting food, having found the abandoned breakfast still in the pan on the stove. Margot apologized and quickly dressed, taking the basket of dirty laundry that her mother prepared to her outside to wash it, wanting to clear her mind a bit and avoid her parent's scolding for a while.

The other soldiers asked Will how he managed to have a wet shirt but dry pants on. He brushed them off with a quick 'wouldn't you like to know' before heading into the barn to find his things. Everything was wet, which he wasn't surprised by. He grabbed them and headed outside, hanging up his wet pants, shirt, and underwear in a tree not far from the barn. He took off the shirt that was wet too, and put it in the tree. He was thankful that it was no longer raining, and that the sun was shining down on them, even if the rain better fit his mood.

He was a weird combination of angry and sad. He was angry that she hadn't listened to him, let him get infinity more attached in the twelve hours that passed, and then told him she didn't want to see him. He was upset because he had gotten so much more attached, even though he knew it was stupid to.

"You barely know her, Will," he mumbled to himself as he began to pace back and forth in front of the barn, in and out of the shade it created. "Stop acting like she broke your heart."

Did she, though? He wasn't sure. He hadn't felt like this with the other girls he'd dated. Sure, he liked them, but not like this. He knew how he felt with Margot was different, but he wasn't sure what it meant. Either way, he was upset and he knew the other guys could tell. They'd been avoiding the grumpy sergeant all day.

His eyes would flicker back to the house every so often. Part of him told him to go marching up to the house and try to fight for her, but the other part told him to just keep pacing. If she didn't want to give it a shot, then he didn't... Except he did. Badly. So badly he could barely stand it.

"If you love someone, let them go," he muttered, rolling his eyes. "Stupid fuckin' saying."

@ poe dameron

While William was pacing around the barn Esther had managed to fill the washing tub with water and was struggling to drag it to where she wanted it, nearly falling on her butt a good number of times. When she finally got it close enough to where she wanted it she knelt next to it with the laundry basket and began to scrub the shirts and pants her mother had given her clean, the hard manual work helping to distract her from thinking about William.

She wanted to give her and William a shot, she'd be a fool not to want that by the way she felt, but she'd be a fool to think anything serious would come of it. She just had to survive nine more days, and then he'd be gone forever, and she wouldn't have to worry about running into him.

Of course, as soon as she turned to bring the washed laundry to the line to dry she spotted William pacing around a tree outside, catching herself staring for a moment before she hurried to hang the clothes so she could go back inside or to the orchard or anywhere where she wouldn't have to look at him and feel her heart break all over again.

He wished he hadn't seen her. He would have been able to stick to listen to the half of him that was telling him to just give up on her if he hadn't bloody seen her. She was doing exactly what she was doing the first time William saw her, hanging clothes to dry. He quickly grabbed his shirt out of the tree and threw it on. Cursing himself, he jogged over to where she was working.

He opened his mouth to talk when he arrived, but words fell short. Will wasn't sure what he was going to say. Did he embarrass himself and yell? Did he embarrass himself more and cry?

"What changed?" he asked, unable to think of something better. "I don't... I don't understand. Last night as you were falling asleep you said you were falling in love with me. Why is that not worth giving a shot anymore?"

He felt a lump rise up in his throat, but swallowed quickly to force the feeling back down into his chest.

@ poe dameron

Margot tried to ignore him as he came over, hoping that maybe he'd jog by her or ask her something simple like 'What time will supper be ready?' But here he was, asking her why she'd changed her mind, a blush creeping up her cheek as she hung up one of the shirts to dry, hiding behind it a bit as she looked up at him sadly.

"I... I'm scared.." she whispered after a moment, looking away from him in embarrassment. Watching him die in her dream had terrified her, and even though she knew it was a dream, she was scared of how awful she would feel if he really died, worried her heart wouldn't be able to take it.

"You'll always be worth it, William, I'm just.. I'm just a coward.."

Will crossed his arms over his chest without saying anything. He wasn't really sure how to respond to that. Scared? He was scared too, terrified more like. She wasn't the one who's life was in imminent danger. She wasn't the one who had already lost his brother, she wasn't the one who'd seen people she'd spend the last year with die all around her. She wasn't the one-

He was being too harsh. Everyone was scared during war times. It didn't matter what she was scared of. He couldn't blow up at her for it. He pushed the anger down, giving his head a small shake. He didn't know what he wanted to do. On one hand, he knew how he felt about her. On the other, he didn't want to spend another two days with her only for her to change her mind about the whole thing again.

He didn't speak, he just looked at her with a blank expression.

@ poe dameron

Margot frowned as he stood there silently, simply staring at her as if waiting for a better explanation, which was something that she didn't have. She decide to try to calm her nerves by hanging up the rest of the laundry, although her hands trembled a little as she secured the clothespins, nearly dropping them about half the time. Once finished she picked up the empty laundry basket, holding it tightly in her arms, staring down at it for a moment before she looked back up at him.

"I... I don't want you to hate me..." She whispered softly, biting her lip to keep it from trembling too, her knuckles white from gripping the basket tightly. "I'm sorry that I upset you, I really am, I-I guess I thought... I-I thought you'd be happy to not have to give us a shot.. After all, you didn't want to yesterday, so I just assumed... I'm sorry.."

Will didn't speak as he watched her hang the laundry. He wanted to help her, but he couldn't bring himself to move. He knew the pair of them were being over dramatic. They'd just met. They hardly knew each other. If they were already fighting, how would a relationship between them last? He pushed that thought out of his head. It was because of the war. No war, no stupid fight over people leaving. No fight over giving relationships a shot.

"So what now," Will asked once she'd finished speaking. "I can go back to the barn and leave you be if you'd like. I can't force you to want to be around me, nor would I want to. But its either we try or we don't."

@ poe dameron

Margot frowned as she looked up at him, shaking her head when he offered to go back to the barn. "No, I don't want you to. And you're not forcing me into anything, I'd be a fool not to want to be around you, William.." she murmured, setting the basket down before hesitantly stepping toward him, biting her lips as she nervously reached for his hands, giving them a little squeeze.

"I.. I want to try, I really do.. But what happens at the end of your holiday? The answer is easy if things don't work out, you leave and I stay here and we forget about each other, but.. but what happens if things do work out? What happens then?" She asked softly as she looked up at him with a frown. "I know you're not even planning on surviving the war, and I know that's a possibility, but what happens if you do survive, and things work out between us? I don't expect you to come back here, why would you? You haven't been home or seen your family in years, and I'd never be foolish enough to think I'd matter more than your family.. I just... I want to know what will happen after the next nine days, even though I know you don't have any answers for me.."

She sighed in irritation, giving his hands another squeeze as she hung her head. "I wish this stupid war had never happened, then we wouldn't be in this mess..."

While he agreed about the war, he also knew that if the war hadn’t happened then they’d never have met. He was glad to have met her. Though he did suppose if he’d never of met her, he’d never be upset that he didn’t. He was thinking about the wrong part of what she said.

She was right. It had been too long since he’d seen his family for
him to want to come back to France. His mother would never forgive him if he put some French girl he’d known for ten days over herself and Will’s sister. Will wouldn’t want to come to France over England, anyways, at least not first right away. He’d need to go home and see his mom and sister first. Then, maybe...

“You could come to England,” Will suggested. “If I somehow make it. You’re right, I have to see my family. But if I’d live... I want to see you, too. I’d want them to see you.”

@ poe dameron

Margot eyes widened slightly in surprise when he told her that he'd want her to come to England with him after the war, wanted her to meet his family. She squeezed his hands nervously. She'd never left France before, but she would for him, if he wanted her to.

"You'd really want me to come to England with you? To meet your family?" She asked softly as she looked up at him, giving his hands another squeeze as she took a little step closer.