Shattering Crystals - Comments

Ok. This is my absolute favorite chapter of the whole story. Wanna know why?
***
"Fine," she agrees. The waiter comes back with our check. Lorraine leans over to read his name tag. "Thanks... Jscott?" It comes out sounding like juh-scott.

"Jay-scott, he corrects. "But spelled J-S-C-O-T-T."

"Why is there a random J in your name?"

"Why is there a random scott in my name?"

Lorraine doesn't have an answer, so she gets out her money for the check. She gets up to leave. "Thanks, Jay-scott."
***
^^EPICNESS
HAHAHA I KNOW HIM. Juh-Scott. rotflmfaoatlabijsdf. (Rolling on the floor laughing my fabulous ass off and then laughing again because it's just so damn funny.) Oh yeah. That just happened. But seriously, I am writing this before I even finished the chapter sooo buh-bai for now and then I will write a real essay (or two).

3. About Teena, they just might kidnap her too?

1. Nope.
2. I don't really know...
3. What's the third question? Lol.

A few typos. Was to lazy to msn you.

1. Flipp a tit?
2. Not really.
3. WHAT THE BUM?
2typos at end, find them?
though -> thought
and i forget other one.
10:29!

I would hate if it were all a dream, I actually didn't think twice when I read he was rooming with the girls haha, and I had a feeling that someone in the story would be in lorraines situation.

1. If it was a dream, i'd flip out. That's not cool.
2. Cause Dean's awesome. or to be with Ashlee/Dana. Idk.
3. It's her own fault.

update. !

Sorry it was a very short essay ^^

YAY. I be finally commenting(: Sorry it took so long... my family hath been trying to keepeth me from Mibba *tear* ANYWAY. I'm going to write another essay. Just. For. You.

SO. I liked that you had Teena (AMAZING name) remember names and stuff, because I like the fact that your starting to introduce people from the next story(: (By the way, Lacey's name is the best<3) I didn't like that it was extremely short though... you could have added MORE DETAILS (I know, surprising, right?) Like, what was the tree house like? How did they get there? Did they go through the house? What was the house like? Could you show the emotions of the group and individuals? Facial expressions? The state of everyone (dirty, tired, etc.)?

Dwell on this. And update. <3

I vote no

I vote no

I like how Teena isn't like the other characters.

Chapter 58 - No typos
Chapter 59 - PACKED FULL<3

That's oki though, AND YES BONUS CHAPTER<3

I thought this chapter was good. I like Teena, but she seems like a know it all. :p haha I wann know why she can't go with them! >.< but yes to the bonus chapter, of course!

I thought they would have to give up on Katalina

OHMYHOLYBEJESUSIWASYOURHUNDREDTHCOMMENT. I bumped you up a star :) hehe

So yeah. I'm awesome.

OH! And I'm changing my mind...I now like ELISE and dislike LORRAINE.

Because Lorraine's a selfish bitch. And Elise is amazing. Just thought you should know.

Thank you soooooo much dahlin for the lovely birthday wish :) I will remember it always<3 hehe :P

ANYWAY. Essay time. (I do owe you ;D) Ok. So, honestly, I think Katalina went along with them a little too easy for my taste. Even though she's self-centered and b****y and whatever, I still think she should put up a bit more of a fight, you know? And I think you could have added more details that lead up to their trip to Singapore and why they're going. (do they sense someone new? intuition? marigold? etc etc) I didn't see many mistakes, (YAY), but you've caught my ellipsis-ititis a bit :P haha but I don't care because I looooove ellipses :) <3

What I liked about the chapter was how you planned out everything they did, but I think you could have gone into more detail with it (AGAIN! haha always detail.) You could even do it in present tense, like showing them AS they plan as oppose to where they are because of the planning. Overall, I think it just comes down to more detail :P haha and you know me and detail...we're lovers. ;) *oh baby* OH! And I liked the ending with the girl at the door... very mysterious. *spooky music*

And there is my essay to you <3 I love ya Dana(:

JK. Your fat rolls are blocking my love.

Wooo, only a couple more chapterss<3

I agree with Ash;

i like kidnapping :]

more?

Kidnapping is always fun, eh?