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Fools Rush In - Comments

  • Maddi;

    Maddi; (6100)

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    I think it would have been interesting to actually see some of the party instead of just the aftermath of it. That way readers would be able to get a feel for the characters before all the drama started going down. Like when Anberlin got pregnant, and I didn't feel any worry or sympathy for her, but I feel like I might have if I had gotten a better feel for her character before or gotten attached to her character. I didn't really care much about her worries because I didn't really care more about her. I think the best thing you could do to improve this story is to develop your characters a little bit more.
    August 10th, 2013 at 05:10pm
  • CassieScars

    CassieScars (100)

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    Okay, I genuinely love the characters you've created... But I personally think it moved too fast.

    A few gramatical mistakes, but other wise well written.

    Other than those few factors I absoloutely ADORE your story. :)
    June 8th, 2012 at 02:40am
  • mysoul4jimmy

    mysoul4jimmy (100)

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    That's what I call a cliffhanger! Holy crap! I can't wait to see what happens, and what her answer will be. The 2 of them have to be scared out of their minds! Can't wait for the next update! :) I love this story, just so you know!!
    May 30th, 2011 at 11:54pm
  • mangomegan

    mangomegan (100)

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    Loooooved it <3 This is really getting good. Im excited for more! :)
    May 28th, 2011 at 05:56am
  • UnbreakMe;UnchainMe

    UnbreakMe;UnchainMe (100)

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    AHH! God, that was crazy. Declan and Anberlin are crazy! xD
    I hope their parents don't kill them xD

    <3
    May 27th, 2011 at 08:34am
  • ellievengeance

    ellievengeance (100)

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    uhm HELLS YES that was a cliff hanger!!!
    you evil evil creature you!!!
    AHHHHHHHH!!!!
    *runs around screaming*

    ... btw, she should say yes :P
    May 16th, 2011 at 09:08am
  • mangomegan

    mangomegan (100)

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    Woohoo! I loved this chapter. Especially the end. I think she should say yes! I hope they get married! That would be exciting! Ahhh now I cant wait.
    May 16th, 2011 at 05:34am
  • UnbreakMe;UnchainMe

    UnbreakMe;UnchainMe (100)

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    Sweet proposal! XD
    Enough said.

    <3
    May 16th, 2011 at 05:26am
  • ellievengeance

    ellievengeance (100)

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    ahhaha Declan seems so spastic :P
    I loves it <3
    May 14th, 2011 at 09:41am
  • mangomegan

    mangomegan (100)

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    I liked it a lot. Tis very good excited for more!
    May 14th, 2011 at 08:11am
  • UnbreakMe;UnchainMe

    UnbreakMe;UnchainMe (100)

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    Woooo! Update and I see you have comments! Wooooooooooo!
    I'm tired and that's why in going wooooooooo!
    XD <3
    May 14th, 2011 at 07:50am
  • mysoul4jimmy

    mysoul4jimmy (100)

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    Great and very necessary chapter. Love the story so far, and I would like to give anything you write a shot, because you are just an amazing writer! Just sayin!!!!! <3
    May 14th, 2011 at 06:56am
  • ellievengeance

    ellievengeance (100)

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    hahaha well then :P
    I love it so far!
    can't wait to see where you take it.
    May 12th, 2011 at 01:21am
  • mysoul4jimmy

    mysoul4jimmy (100)

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    I love this story! Its so great that you were able to take a dream and put it down on 'paper' like this, and sweet enough to share it with all of us. I love how you ended this chapter with Declan fainting! That was hysterical! I couldn't stop laughing at that. Can't wait to see what happens in the upcoming chapters! :)
    May 11th, 2011 at 09:23am
  • mangomegan

    mangomegan (100)

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    This is really good. I think its excellent, truly amazing so far. I cant wait to read more.
    May 11th, 2011 at 03:50am
  • UnbreakMe;UnchainMe

    UnbreakMe;UnchainMe (100)

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    HAHAHHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA! He fainted!!!! WTF?!?! Hahahahahahahahahaha!
    One word: priceless
    XD <3
    May 10th, 2011 at 07:18pm
  • UnbreakMe;UnchainMe

    UnbreakMe;UnchainMe (100)

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    hahahaha, the window xD.
    Well she's preggers! Dx, There is like a mini Declan/Anberlin in there! xO
    What's she gonna tell him!

    <3
    May 10th, 2011 at 08:33am
  • UnbreakMe;UnchainMe

    UnbreakMe;UnchainMe (100)

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    >.> <.< I have taken your comment virginity!!!! hahahahahahhahahha!
    Whoop whoop! New story! xD
    What can I say? xP
    May 10th, 2011 at 05:55am
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