Stay Gold - Comments

The sentence "We have different names." does not belong in this chapter. Nala and Nova are two separate entities of course they'd have different names, you know?

Other than that little thing, I really liked your first chapter. I like the way you set your characters up so far, and you do kind of have the same style as the novel 'The Outsiders' going on for this (not sure if it's intentional) but I like that too. As far as first chapters go (I only read one) You're doing pretty great.

So far I've only read up to chapter 7 for the moment and just needed to stop and comment on how much I'm really digging this story. I was OBSESSED with The Outsiders in 7th grade when we had to read it, but more importantly, I was even more obsessed with Dally. I literally printed out pictures of him and stuck it onto my notebook and also bought a white shirt and wrote, "I love Dally" in puffy paint all over it. It's literally the most embarrassing I've ever done but this story is bringing back old memories.

I'm loving the two POVs, it gives the whole situation different perspectives and I really like that. I feel bad for Elaine but I'm finding it hard to believe she went all the way to Tulsa so easily and quickly, but I guess that's contributed to the whole 'diary' thing. But anyways, I'm going to continue reading it and scream when Dally makes an appearance

I really like how, with this story, we get two different stories in one. We get to see what things are like for Nala now and also see what life was like for Elaine back when she was younger. I think it's so interesting to see the similarities between the two girls, because they have a lot of the same "isms" if that makes sense? They are just more similar than they think they are. I really like in the second chapter when Nala mentions having her grandma move in and Elaine immediately says no because of all the memories. I feel like that is such an elderly person thing to do and I love that you were able to capture that part of her generation.

HOLY SHIT! This is definitely a big plot twist! 0_0 I hope Dally will get some help (if not then Darry will kick his ass. XD). Agh, Eryn I hope she survives, no I hope the baby'll be alright! I mean stupid Dally had to do all that! >:( I'll wait to read more when you update it, girly. Great work as always.

I really like this! I've always been a huge fan of The Outsiders, especially Dallas. I haven't read many stories based off of it, though, but I can already tell that is probably among one of the most unique ones. I love the change of narrative and your writing style, and I hope you'll continue to find inspiration to update this.

So the first paragraph I find really weird. Of course they have different names. I also find it weird that it's such a big deal.

Well, I've finished the first chapter and it's just not something I'm interested in reading. It's nothing against you as a writer.

I wish you luck with the rest of it.

Oh shit. Elaine's pregnant?! GOddamn it, Dallas, man up and take care of Elaine and the baby! Ohoho, I can almost imagine what Daryl's gonna do when he finds out Elaine's pregnant. XD I hope Dallas won't turn his back on Elaine because she needs him now more than ever. Eryn, this story just keeps getting better with every update. Cant wait to read more. <3

This is a really good update :) It's well written and I can't wait to see what you bring to the next chapter

Comment swap! (sorry this took me much longer than usual), BUT none the less. I do not know the outsiders, but reading your summary I got very excited to read the first chapter! So that's always a good thing. Also the lay out is nice and not too distracting.

Well, on to the story it is! I like the setting, 1960 such an period which is not common to write about. Thats why I like it. I also like the changes between the story and the moments she really talks to the reader, (like the part she tells whats wrong with her appearances and such)

I understand her annoyance of having to go to grandma instead of hanging with cute boys, eventhough I love my nanna too! I also identify with Nala, since she is always being the good girl. I am like that too.

You're writing is easily readable and such a delite!

Great story!

Comment swap :) I don't know anything about the Outsiders but I really love the retroness (is that a word, lol) of the story. It's really interesting to read a story set in the 1960s. It's cool to see what the 60s were like from the point of view of a teenager because it was such along time ago now.

It was really hard to read the abuse scenes because I can't stand people who abuse kids but I was glad that Elaine escaped. I love the lads' nicknames (and real names, poor Ponyboy xD ).

It must have been super scary when Elaine got appendicitis. My niece had that last year and that sucked. I would be scared to go into hospital too!

Hola! Comment swapping from le blog. I'm alsovon my phone so there will probably be some typos. Bear with me. Hahaha.

I just finished chapter 4. I'm really liking this. I never see Outsiders fics on this website. This is so exciting!. I really like the twins' names too. Especially Nova. Nala also makes me think of The Lion King ^_^ I like your imagery in this and how you included diary entries. I'm off to chapter 5 now!

Nala and Nova, I like those names.
I read the Outsider's when I was in seventh grade, probably one of my favorite books ever, and you've done such an amazing job with this. I really enjoyed reading this. You built your characters up very well and I love your descriptions. Good job.

OMG ITS A MOTHER FLUFFING OUTSIDERS FIC SOMEONE HOLD ME. THIS IS MY ALL TIME FAVOURITE BOOK AND THE MOVIE WAS PERFECTION OMG. IM CRYING RIGHT NOW. I MUST READ THIS.
O H M Y G O S H.

I love this story so much! :)

Hehe, it's nice to see Elaine kinda warming up to Dallas! Wonder what's gonna happen during New Year's Eve. I'm loving your story, I get sucked into it so much that I actually feel scared for Elaine whenever she gets into trouble. I hope you update soon :D

Okay, I finally got to chapter twenty-two. All I can say is: Wow. This is probably my favorite story on Mibba right now, and I'm not even exaggerating. We talked before about how much I loved the Outsiders and this just reaffirmed my love. I want to go and watch the movie and read the story, now. The entire time I read this, I felt like I was reading a very elaborate sequel to the book! It's just so good. Ahh. So good. I love how Dallas and Elaine's characters have developed with one another and their relationship. It's so cute to read about them bickering and such. I seriously cannot wait for the next update! Subscribing and recommending... and eagerly waiting for the next update.

So sorry it took me to read and comment your story, please forgive me!

Anywho, I love the names, Nala and Nova They're so pretty and unique.
Whoa, there’s the rebel in me. Glitter makes you tough, right? <--- Probably my favorite line so far. It made me laugh. I like Nala's character, I can sort of relate to her about wanting to be rebellious and break out of her sheltered life. I love Elaine as well, you've done such a good job with this. I remember being in 7th grade and I hated reading The Outsiders but you've made me want to reread it. <3

I'm halfway through this story and I love it so much! It's bringing me right back to my days of obsessing over "The Outsiders"; you write all of the characters from the book so well, and I love Elaine!

I remember reading the first chapter so I'll just go ahead and critique the second one c:

Wow...I just. Goodness. I don't know how you write in first person p.o.v so greatly. I'm really jealous because every time I try, it feels overplayed and cliche and I envy your ability. I just...argh, stop it Eryn. Anyway, I really adored the intro to the second chapter with Nala and her grandmother speaking. They seem to have such a great relationship I kind of melted. I think it's time for me to recommend this.

I love this story ^.^ I can't imagine finding journals from older family members, nor do I know if I'd really actually have the balls to read them o.O