Silence You Lost Me

I opened my eyes, squinting as sun beamed through the window. Someone was on the couch, staring at me. Jumping up, I hit my head on the bunk above me and I let out a sting of swearing. The person jumped up and touched my arm lightly.

“Are you okay?” Matt…

I nodded, watching whomever was above my bunk climb out of theirs. “Aww we should have warned you about that. We’ve done that so many fucking times.” Jimmy sighed, running his hand through my hair.

“I’m find guys, it’s okay.” I still had Zacky’s shirt on and it smelled just like him. It smelled like my high school years when he’d sleep over and I’d steal his shirts. Men’s shirts are so much more comforting, have you ever realized that? I’ve stolen his shirts for years and I always feel safe when I can breathe in his scent.

“Uhh, Trin?” Matt called.

“Hmm?”

“You with us?” and I realized I must have spaced out; “we have a show tonight.”

“What!? Tonight!?”

Jimmy chuckled, sitting back where Matt was when he scared me minutes before. “Come here, darling.” And I did, sitting beside him as Matt resided on my bunk.

“But, aren’t I dancing this show?”

Matt nodded, “Yep.”

My heart beat, “just me?”

“Well, we don’t really have others yet. We could get some strippers if we’re early.” Jimmy smiled.

“So, as of now, it’s just me? And if we’re late, it’s just me?” I’ve done plenty of shows before but never at a concert.

Matt sighed, “Is that a problem?”

“Well, I-I mean, I-….” He raised an eyebrow at me, “sort of. Won’t it look dumb for just me to be dancing up there?”

Jimmy trailed his hand down my thigh, “I’m sure the guys will be grateful that a half-naked girl was onstage.” He winked.

I breathed, knowing Jimmy was right, “Okay. If you don’t mind though, I’m gonna practice.” Matt’s lips curved into a smirk which he attempted to hide.

I pushed them out of the room and threw off Zacky’s shirt, placing it in my suitcase. What he doesn’t know can’t hurt him. I then picked out a bra and pair of Victoria’s Secret Pink shorts to dance in.

I pulled out my iPod and put it on full-blast to Scream; the song I’d be dancing to tonight. The ear buds were placed in and I allowed Syn’s guitar playing to overcome my body.

I swayed to the beat, hitting my hips from side to side. I mouth the words, keeping my eyes closed as I danced in the small area that I had to work with, the back of the bunk room. I imagined what it would be like to be onstage with my idols, the guys I’ve loved for years, dancing to one of the sexiest songs I’ve heard in years.

In my head, I planned out my routine.

The song continued and I moved to the melodic guitar solo. My hand ran down my body as the chorus piped back in.

As the song came to a close, I opened my eyes to see I had an audience of one. Matt stood in the doorway, smirking at me, boner evident.

The last cord played and I pulled out my ear buds, turning off my iPod and tossing it in my suitcase.

“How long were you standing there?” I breathed, sweat on my body.

Matt held up a bottle of water, “I came to give you this but didn’t think you’d be…practicing…so soon.” He chuckled.

“Mmm,” I poured the water in my mouth, watching Matt out of the corner of my eye. His eyes held lust as he stared at me.

“So uh…your back’s looking better.” He stated.

“Is it?” I tired looking, feeling like an idiot.

He nodded, stepping closer to me. I wondered why my heart picked up again. “We’ll get someone to take care of that later.” And his hand brushed the strands of hair out of my face. His lips pressed into mine and I soon found myself on my bunk, completely naked with Matt’s shirtless and pant-less self on top of me. He kissed down my body and roughly pulled off his boxers, his length shocking me yet again.

I really wanted him. I’d never had to dance right after having sex but that was okay…

“Guys, we’re gonna be there soon.” I heard Lacey call.

There was a pause and a bit of muttering as Matt licked my pussy. I whimpered, bucking my hips. “Guys?” this time it was Jimmy that called.

“Alright!” Matt snapped, annoyed that someone was interrupting us.

There was silence as Matt continued. I hated this, I knew that I had to be quiet but I’m the complete opposite. I just wanted to scream out when Matt played with my clit.

“Matt…” I whispered, looking down at him, “please?”

“Please what?” he teased, rubbing his hardened member against my thigh.

I bit my lip, “now…”

He smirked again, entering me roughly, just the way I’d wanted it. He looked at me, searching my features for pain but when I bucked my hips again, he knew that I was ready for whatever he wanted to give me…

Our time continued and the first time he hit my spot, my hand clasped over my mouth. I bit my tongue so I wouldn’t scream, it wasn’t working too well. Matt’s hand pushed mine back and I feared he was interested in the game that made me see how strong I was at suppressing my screams; a game I would easily lose at the way he was rocking me…

Instead, his lips were on mine again and his tongue glided along mine all the while thrusting into me so roughly.

“Guys?” another call which I’d barely heard. This time I think it was Johnny? I wasn’t sure…

We had barely heard the door crack open and someone’s head peeking in, but Matt glanced up then back at me, then did a double-take at the door.

“Johnny fucking Christ, close that door, motherfucker!” Matt called, still thrusting into me. His screaming voice made me want to cum on the spot. How I loved that man’s scream…

“Whoa there, Shads. Are you sure you’re not hurting the poor thing?” Johnny joked. Matt reached for the nearest thing which were my shorts and panties, and threw them at the door. I heard Johnny laugh then make a creepy giggle noise. “I got me some panties!” he shrieked and I groaned as the door slammed shut.

“Sorry about your panties.” Matt chortled.

I stuck out my tongue which made him thrust harder; something I hadn’t thought was possible.

After multiple more thrusts, I peaked, cumming onto Matt’s hardened dick, which soon pulsed inside of me with a release of his own.

He gasped, burying his face in my shoulder and riding out our orgasms.

Once the spasms faded, I sat up with Matt, leaning over the bed. “Wow…” I sighed.

He smirked at me, “Yeah, I haven’t fucking felt this good since…”

“-Last time?” I pointed out, laughing. He joined in.

“Ah, last time was fucking great. I hadn’t fucking came in so long and thanks to you, it was all I was thinking about.” He blurted, blushing slightly.

“Was it now?” I giggled.

I pulled my bra on and stole his boxers, sliding them on and making my way to the door.

“What am I supposed to do now?” he pouted, pointing at his dick, covered in my juices.

I sighed, “Just wait, I’m getting my panties back. Cover up.” I laughed, throwing his shirt at him and watching him lay down under the covers of my bunk.

I walked out to the main area, staring at the others. Mila and Ad slightly waved at me, smirking.

“There she is now.” Zacky chuckled.

“Didja have fun?” Brian poked my side. I jumped back, tickled, and searched for Johnny.

“Where’s the little shithead?” They smiled and pointed behind Jimmy where I found Johnny, hugging my panties and shorts to his chest. “What the-”

Jimmy interrupted, “He’s fucking weird, we know.”

I placed my hands on my hips, “Alright.” He sighed, handing them back to me.

“Thank you.” I kissed his cheek, heading back to get dressed and give Matt back his boxers.

“Shads, get over here now!” Jimmy whined, jumping around. I laughed at his antics; we’ve been here for a grand total of three minutes and already, Jimmy’s begging to leave. Matt has been lounging around since our fuck. I showered and readied myself then had to wake him up for his turn.

He made his way to us, yawning, “Man, I’m fucking tired.”

“I wonder why.” Jimmy muttered, taking my hand and leading me off the bus. We walked into the venue to put their stuff back. Everyone was ready for the show now. They needed to do a sound check then the show would start. They were on after a few bands.

Leana hugged me, “so, are we getting you friends for tonight?” she asked.

I looked up at Matt who stood on my other side; he smiled, “sure. If ya want ‘em.”

“Yay!” I cheered, feeling a bit relieved.

Jimmy showed me around, telling me where they were to stay before the performance, where the stuff was, and where I’d be getting ready. We had a half hour before we all had to be ready.

“So, who’s coming to get the strippers?” Lacey asked.

“Since Trin’s gonna be working with them, she will. Matt can go, Brian, and anyone else?” Leana asked.

“I’ll go!” Mila smirked, running to glomp me.

“What about you, Adalyn?” I asked her.

She smiled slightly, “Lacey asked if I’d like to keep her company. I’ll see you when you get back.”

So we were off. We said our goodbyes, the guys put on their shades and we walked down to the strip joint. Upon entering, I grabbed someone’s hand out of fright. It was Mila and she squeezed it reassuringly, knowing that I’d always hated it in here. I’d usually be hit in the face when I was a minute late back where I worked. Frank didn’t like me there later. At first, yes.

Matt and Brain led us to the front, talking with the manager. I gazed around at the dancers and the men in the joint. No one looked friendly. Or, at least to me. Every time I’d go in one of these places, I felt like a slave…

My right hand gently touched the back of my neck, right where Frank cut me, claiming me as ‘his’.

“We’d like to get some girls.” Matt began explaining who they were and why. The man’s face lit up and he smiled.

“Anything for Avenged Sevenfold. Here, let me get them lined up so you can chose.” He whistled.

Brian nudged me, “is that what that asshole did for you too?” he spoke softly. I nodded, staring at the ground and fighting off the urge to bolt. He grabbed my other hand, playing with my fingers.

A group of about 14 girls lined up, staring at us. They checked out the men and glared at Mila and I. I glared right back. They weren’t the kind of girls I liked to dance with. I liked the hardworking ones who were sweet, not bitchy ones.

“Any requests?” Matt asked me, smirking. A smirk that faded once he saw Brian holding my hand. I shook my head, pleading with my eyes for him to drop the subject, pick some random girls, and get on with it. It didn’t happen. “Come on, none?”

“Fine.” I sighed, pulling my hands out of my friends’ grasps. I walked down the line of women, looking at them and faking a smile. Some smiled back. Some glared. I stopped in front of one with pink streaks in her hair, “her. One down. How many do you want.”

“As many as you like.” The manager told.

“Three more.” Matt nodded at me.

I watched the one onstage; she was working it really well but was paying attention to us at the same time. Her brown hair wasn’t natural but she was really pretty and super tall. “The one onstage too.” I pointed.

“Okay.” The manager wrote something down on paper.

Two more… two more. My mind racked through options. “Who wants to do this, first of all?” a few hands raised. “Who works well with others?” a few of the hands went down. “Who isn’t afraid to show me what you’ve got right now?” a few stepped forward. The others backed up, glaring again. The girl with the really short hair started, dancing to the techno music that blared in the background. The tall orange-haired girl joined in, then so did a real blonde. A redhead stared off at us from the side. She hadn’t been in the line and she hadn’t been ready to dance. She stood in a school girl outfit, holding her hand up to her lips, hiding a nervous look. I walked over to her. “What’s your name?”

She jumped back a bit, startled, “A-Alexis.”

“She’s uh…she’s new. I don’t think you’d like her.” The manager spoke.

“Do you know of Avenged Sevenfold’s music?” I asked, ignoring the manager. She nodded stiffly. “Do you want to do this?” she took a second but nodded. “Why aren’t you out there then?”

“I’m uh…n-nervous.” She shook.

I smiled softly, “it’s alright. Why are you so nervous?”

“I don’t have much experience and I’m really…really scared to mess up in front of the band.”

I smiled again, genuinely. She reminded me of myself when I was younger. “Alright. You’re in.”

“What?” she and the manager spoke in unison.

“Did I stutter?” I asked, giggling, “come on.”

She followed me and I held her hand, guiding her to the pink-streaked girl and the one who’d just gotten offstage. The manager informed her of what she was doing and she smiled. Alexis didn’t let go of my hand, she stared at me nervously as I watched the other girls dance.

“Have you decided?” Brian asked.

“Her.” I pointed to the blond without thinking, just wanting diversity. There were so many dark haired girls; I’d feel badly if I hadn’t let one blond in. Big mistake.

Alexis was the only name I knew and she was the one who held on tightly to my hand. She seemed scared as ever but I tried calming her down by sending her nice looks if she’d gaze in my direction.

Matt stated that we’d bring them back and give them their money when we got it. Whatever. Business stuff. Stuff I didn’t care to hear.

We left shortly after, walking down the street the guys had their shades on again. They were dressed under their long coats to hide their outfits. I’d done that too many times. Walked home late at night in a trench coat, hiding a skimpy outfit underneath.

Alexis still held onto my hand and we hurriedly walked down the street. Brian relaxed back, making sure we were all headed in the right direction. Have I ever told you I get lost easily? Well, I do.

Once inside the venue, we went to the dressing room.

Breathing a sigh of relief, I still held Alexis’ hand reassuringly.

“Okay, well now that we’re here, we can tell you everyone’s names.” Brian spoke.

I smiled at him, nodding at Mila. “Well,” I began. “This is Brian, that big guy over there is Matt,” I winked at him, “the loveable tall man standing eerily close to me is Jimmy,” I giggled, lightly pushing him so I had personal space. He just came right back to the spot he stood in seconds before, staring at me like he wanted to eat me. I realized I had to deal with it for now and continued, “That man getting his eyeliner on is Zacky and the short fucker in the corner is Johnny. Leana is over there on the couch with Lacey,” I pointed to her, “and Adalyn. And the other girl that came with me is Mila.”

A few ‘heys’ were muttered.

“And this, is my sexy private dancer. You may call her ‘boss’.” Jimmy laughed manically. I giggled.

“Don’t scare them.” I scolded with another laugh.

He sighed, “I’m off to get dolled up for this shit. Check ya late-a bitches.” He threw up deuces and walked off, skipping to Zacky and stealing his eyeliner.

“Don’t really call me boss. I’m Trinity.” I smiled at them. “Now what are your names?” I felt like I was back in kindergarten again.

“I’m Alexis.” The one I’d met before spoke, the shy redhead.

“I’m Chrissie.” The one with the pink streaks spoke.

“Nina.” Said the tall brunette.

“Tiff.” The blond said.

“Do you need to get anything ready?” I questioned, stepping to the mirror beside Jimmy and applying more eyeliner.

“No, we’re good.” Chrissie spoke for everyone.

When no one had a problem, I went back to my eyeliner, placing a star beside my eye.

“Ohhh, Trin!” Jimmy called, jumping around. I saw the blond, Tiff, scoff at Jimmy’s behavior. “Can I have a star too!?”

Laughing, I nodded and sat him down in a chair. I leaned forward, applying the star to his left eye, like mine.

When I was done, he thanked me about a hundred times and bounced off. Alexis came over to me.

“What’s up?”

“What song are we dancing to?” she asked softly, standing in her sailor outfit still.

I smiled, pulling down my bra straps and turning to the wall with my purse which held my outfit. “Scream.” I said, facing the wall, I pulled my shirt off and undid my bra, pulling on the tight uniform top. I then slipped off my shorts and pulled the miniskirt over my thong. I felt something on my back. It was Jimmy. He had coverup in his hand and was putting it all over my back. The bruises were dim already but we wanted to be sure we’d be fine.

“Perfect.” He spoke. “looks back to normal.” He hugged me tightly, whispering in my ear “everything’s alright now. We’ve got you.” and I held on to every word.

“Can we practice?” I saw behind her was Matt on the couch, looking tired as fuck. That whore Tiff was beside him, stroking his thigh. Anger pulsed through me and I turned to Brian who was fiddling around with his guitar.

“Can you play Scream for us?” I asked him. I knew it wouldn’t sound the same, but it was something. He nodded, smirking at my outfit.

I watched Mila and Adalyn walk by with boxes of merch in their hands. We smiled and they were off to the merch booth.

Brian started, “alright, just get into it. Don’t care who’s looking.” I told Alexis. She nodded unsure. She slowly got the hang of it and I told Brian to stop. She looked fine, just nervous. “So do you go out to clubs with a lot of men? You know how you grind on them, right? Like you don’t care.” She seemed a bit unsure. I looked around for an example to find Tiff on Matt’s lap. I glared then pulled Brian over as he took off his guitar.

“Sweet, demonstration!” Jimmy bounded over.

Leana turned on the radio before I had the chance to ask. “Thanks.” I spoke to her. Shake It by Metrostation came on. Brian began dancing that stupid guy way, where they kinda just bob to it. Though, if I were a man, I would have no idea how to dance… “watch.” I told Alexis at the chorus. I shook my body, bouncing back on Brian and grinding on him. I humped my hips back and forth, shaking to the beat. Brian laughed loudly.

“Well that’s a first for right before a show.” He called, still dancing. His hands found their way to my hips and he trailed down with his calloused fingers.

“Join in.” I told Alexis. She came in front of me, closed her eyes and began dancing with me. “You’ve got it!” I told her when the song ended.

“Avenged,” someone poked their head in the room, “You’re on in three.” Johnny nodded at the random man who left after.

“Ready?” Johnny put his bass on.

“As we’ll ever be.” Zacky cheered.

“Well, we play Scream four songs in. You’ll be on the side and when the lights dim, you girls run on.” Matt spoke. We nodded at him.

My eyes fell onto him, staring then glaring. Her body was still on his, she was staring at me, smirking. Fuck. This.

Brian’s hand hit mine and I glance up at him. He gave me that ‘it’s okay’ look and I breathed. When Tiff got up, I went over to Matt and handed him his mic, leaning up and letting him kiss my lips. He pulled me closer, trailing his tongue on my bottom lip. I grabbed his ass then pulled back.

“Have a great show, tiger.” I giggled.

He smirked, “Have fun dancing.” I winked at his comment then watched him leave with the guys. I took Alexis’ hand and walked out the door. I felt an elbow in my side, hitting a small bruise. I gasped and glared at Tiff as she strutted to the side of the stage.

“Don’t mind her. She wants a guy and you get in her way, you’re on her shit list.” Chrissie laughed.

“It’ll be okay.” Nina reassured. “He’s clearly your man.”

I gulped. No, not really…

Tears welled in my eyes as I watched her grab Matt’s ass before he walked on stage. Zacky saw and glared at her then glanced back at me. Then he was gone, covered by the curtain. Tiff waited for us by the curtain and that’s where we stood.

I gulped, closing my eyes and repeating Jimmy’s words in my head:

Everything’s alright now. We’ve got you. And I held on to every word even tighter this time…

Everything’s alright now…