Us; I love that

I looked down, feeling my whole world crash down. “c-can I see her?”

“Are any family members here?”

“Not yet. they live in Florida…”

“And you’re the boyfriend?” he questioned, giving me a weak smile. all I could do was nod. “You may see her. I advise you to tell her whatever she asks, no matter what-but don’t go overboard on trying to convince her to remember,” he said quietly, patting my shoulder. I nodded again, stepping forward towards the door. I lifted my shaky hand to grab the handle and push it open slowly. I stuck my head in and spotted her. she looked so angelic. she was sitting, looking down at her hands until she heard the door squeak. her head snapped up to reveal a bandage on the left side of her forehead. I gave her a weak smile as she peered at me questioningly. I sighed, stepping in fully and closing the door, making my way over to her bed and stopping a few feet away. all I wanted was to just pick her up and kiss her-just to hear her say she loved me… but she didn’t. she didn’t even know a Nicholas Jonas existed or who the heck I was to her, her expression said it.

“Mitchie…” I started, watching her slowly.

“So that’s my name?” she asked. her voice rang through me, sending chills. I nodded. “Mitchie Johnson.”

She nodded, biting her lip. “I take it you know me then?”

I closed my eyes and let my head drop feeling pain strike through my heart. this would be hurtful. “Yeah. I know you,” I cracked.

“Could you tell me something about me? no one knows and you’re the only regular person to come in here…” she furrowed her eyebrows, watching me. “I don’t think we’re related…” she started. I shook my head.

“We aren’t.” I sighed, spotting a chair next to the bed. “D-do you mind if I sit?” I questioned, not knowing what I was able to do. she shook her head, smiling slightly. I slowly made my way over, keeping my eyes on her as I sat. “What would you like to know?” I asked quietly, unable to use my real voice.

“Anything about me, please.”

I blinked a few times, pushing away tears that needed to be let out. ‘Your name is Mitchie Johnson and your eighteen. From what I know, you moved around a lot. You moved to Jersey a few months back and we met at school. Your parents went back to Florida with your brother and you stayed here, with your grandma. You, uh, you like photography. You… well, Abby, Carey, Mike and I are your friends,” I took another deep breathe.

“So… this is New York? Why am I here?”

I bit my lip. “You’re here for college-photography.”

Her eyes widened. “Am I any good?”

I cracked a smile. “You’re great.”

She smiled back, but it wasn’t the smile I loved. “So… who are you then?”

That’s the question that broke me further. right now, I was nothing to her. “My name’s Nick. I’m your b-” I paused. “I’m your best friend.” I felt my lips quiver and I had to look down.

“Really? I thought I’d have a girl best friend.” I couldn’t lie to her, but I couldn’t come out and say that we loved each other. she’d get weirded out. her voice interrupted my thoughts. “Do I have diabetes or something?” she asked, causing my head to snap up and see her with the dog tag in her hands, running her thumb over the surface gently. I felt my heart receive a pang of hurt at the memory.

“No. I… I have diabetes. I gave those to you,” I responded, feeling my cheeks heat up as she smiled slightly.

“What about this?” she smiled brighter, looking at the necklace I bought her for Christmas.

I took another deep breathe. “I got that for you… Christmas.”

She cocked her head, eyeing my face. “So you’re my best friend?” she questioned, almost suspiciously. I nodded, watching her look down almost admiringly at something. I furrowed my eyebrows. my heart froze as she lifted her hand, revealing the promise ring. I bit my lip hard, tasting the blood on my tongue. “I suppose you know who this came from then…”

“Uh. yeah…” I rubbed the back of my neck as she kept her gaze on me. “I-I gave that to you.”

She raised her eyebrow and I saw her eyes sparkle. “It’s beautiful. but… why would my best friend buy me a ring that I wear on my engagement finger?”

I had to tell her. she was too smart. “Okay… well I’m… I’m your boyfriend.”

Her eyes widened slightly. “You are? how?”

“It’s a long story.”

“Give me the short version,” she begged.

“Umm. you came to Preston Academy and you were shy. I was intrigued by you and I found out you were kind of asking about me. I was the jock and you didn’t like that, but we started talking and… and we went to a party together. I kissed you-” I felt my cheeks get warm as she kept her eyes on me. “You said you liked me after I admitted it. and well… I kind of wrote some songs for you.” I watched her lips twitch into a smile. “I asked you to be my girlfriend and you said yes… and then I said I loved you,” I choked out, watching her. she didn’t say anything, so I continued. “You said it back and we just… well, we fell in love. we’ve been together for a long time and that-that ring is a promise ring I gave you one night.” My heart sped up at the memory.

“So… we were serious?” she whispered, letting her eyes trail over me. I felt my cheeks burning at her just staring. I just wanted to hold her in my arms and tell her that I loved her. I wanted her to remember.

“Yeah,” I breathed out when she finally caught my gaze again, her own cheeks slightly pink.

“Uh- did we ever…” she trailed off, biting her lip again. I watched as her bangs fell over her eyes like always. I knew what she meant and if it was even possible, my cheeks got hotter.

“Y-yeah.”

Her cheeks flushed, but she didn’t look away from me. “How many times?” she whispered.

“Two.”

“That’s it?” she blurted out, looking away quickly. I furrowed my eyebrows, feeling myself wanting to smile.

“What do you mean ‘that’s it?”” I questioned.

“I-uh… well, I just thought that… ya know. Your obviously attractive…” she trailed off, her eyes becoming nervous. I couldn’t stop my smile.

“Thank you. you know-well, you don’t-but your very beautiful.” I knew my words were shy. Her cheeks flashed a brighter red.

“I am?”

I nodded furiously, causing her to smile. “You are.”

“Could you tell me when?” she then asked.

I rubbed the back of my neck again, remembering the two times. “we talked about it a few times before we actually did,” I admitted first. “We agreed that we would both share it because we loved each other…”

“You were a virgin before me?” she asked in disbelief. I felt myself smile as I nodded.

“The night I gave you the promise ring was the first time…” I trailed off, watching her lips twitch slightly. was she trying to hold back a smile? “And the other was… well, actually last night,” I admitted sheepishly, the thoughts filling my head. her eyes widened slightly.

“Was there an occasion?”

I held back a laugh and gave her a nod. Her eyes told me to explain. “At graduation, you found out that I got an offer to teach music in California… and you were going to New York-” another pang hit my heart at the memory of when she broke up with me. “Apparently you let Missy talk you into breaking-up with me…”

“Oh no,” she gasped, her eyes widening. “Why?”

“Because she convinced you that I’d forget about you. but I could never…” I sighed again.

“Why would I listen?”

“I don’t know. You two hate each other,” I shrugged.

“I’m sorry… but are we together now?”

That kind of confused me. I thought we were after last night, but now she didn’t remember. “Umm… last night, I came to visit you after a few months. We both explained things and… and well, we…uh-” I trailed off, receiving a nod from her. “I-I thought we were… but you don’t know who I am, so…”

“I’m sorry,” she apologized, sincerity in her eyes.

“It isn’t your fault. I just… well, it-it hurts,” I whispered. I saw her nod and look down at the ring.

“So you really love me?” she smiled sweetly. It broke me. I almost lost it, the tears threatened again.

“I do,” I choked out, unable to keep a tear from releasing. her face became worried and she opened her mouth to speak, but I stopped her. “I’m sorry. I, uh… I have to go,” I spat out, throwing my hand to my face and rubbing the tear away before rushing to the door. as soon as it closed, I let out a sob and let my face drop to my hands.

“Nicholas,” I heard my mother’s worried voice call. Many footsteps followed, but I didn’t look up when she pulled me in for a hug. My body shook as she held me tight.

“She-she can’t remember…” I managed to choke out as I hugged her tight.

I heard her breathe catch as she pulled me closer. “It’s okay…”

“No it’s not. she’ll never know how much I love her. she doesn’t know me. she wanted me to explain our relationship and I was okay at first… but then I just broke down when she wanted me to confirm that I loved her,” I sobbed, hearing a few feet come forward. I felt hands on my back and soothing words, but nothing would be better. I just wanted her to remember me… please.