When I Look At You

“Joe, I have a new assignment for you.” Dave said, walking into Joe’s office and taking a seat across the desk.

“Excellent.” Joe said, turning away from his computer. “Lay it on me.”

“A wedding. The groom is from a very wealthy family around these parts and the wedding is going to be very lavish. Therefore, you will have a partner on this.”

“Sure, no problem. Is it Richard?” Joe asked, leaning back in his chair.

“No, Charlotte.” Dave said and Joe took in a deep breath. “Is something wrong?”

“No… nothing’s wrong. When is the wedding?”

“This Saturday. I’ll have the location and time for you tomorrow.”

“Alright, thanks Dave.” Joe said as Dave stood up.

“Oh, and Joe,” Dave said, turning at the door. “Help her out a little. Her vision seems to be… cloudy… lately.”

“No problem.”

****

“You’re late.” Joe said, standing up from the chair. He had been sitting in the foyer of the church waiting for Charlotte. The creases in his pants smoothed out as he stood and walked towards her. He was wearing of his best suits meant for occasions such as this.

“Sorry. Traffic.” Charlotte mumbled as she took her coat off and hung it up on the coat rack.

“Bit of advice,” he said, grabbing his camera bag and heading over to the wedding planner. “Whenever you have big events such as a wedding, it’s always in your best interest to leave a half an hour earlier than you think. That way you don’t keep the wedding planner waiting, and more importantly, you don’t keep the bride waiting.”

“Thanks.” She said as the wedding planner gave a sigh of relief when she saw them.

“I see your partner has arrived.” She said, glancing over at Charlotte. “We’ll start with a few photos of the groom and the groomsmen. A few shots of them together, a few of the groom alone, and of course a few with his parents. He also wants a few taken with his brother, the best man, and with his nephew the ring bearer.”

“Of course.” Joe said, following her to the back of the church, Charlotte trailing him.

“Then I’ll bring you over to the bridal suite. She wants a ton of pictures taken with her bridesmaids, sister slash maid of honor, parents, and god-daughter slash flower girl.”

“Sounds good.” Joe said, setting his bag down as they entered the room with the groomsmen.

“After that the two of you will be able to quietly weave your way throughout the church during the ceremony to take photographs. We want the bridal party at the altar some of the guests but mostly of the ceremony. Then pictures after the ceremony of the bridal party the families and what-not. Then of course we’ll travel to the reception hall where you can take photographs of whatever you want.”

“Thank you,” Charlotte said, copying Joe and getting her camera ready.

“How about you go get the groom and the groomsmen together while I find the right setting for this light?” Joe said, taking some test photographs.

“Okay,” she said warily. “Should I have them stand over…”

“Charlotte.” Joe said abruptly, causing her to jump. “I don’t really care where you stand them as long as they’re standing together. Just… do it please and don’t ask questions.”

“Sorry,” she whispered, turning away from him and he sighed.

The groom stood nervously in the middle of the room, his four groomsmen flanking his sides. Joe positioned himself across from them and held his camera in front of his face. Charlotte hovered over his shoulder uncomfortably.

“Okay Jeff,” Joe said, addressing the groom. “Try to push those nerves away and give me a smile.”

Jeff nodded his head and put a smile on his face. Joe snapped a few photos successfully. The wedding planner then walked in with the groom’s parents and Joe knew he had to move on to a few photos of Jeff and his brother. He was about to say something when Charlotte tapped his shoulder.

“Maybe you should get some of the groom, his brother and their parents together too.”

“Yes, Charlotte, I was already planning that.” He said, sighing again and out of the corner of his eye he saw her frown. “Listen; go inform his parents that that’s what we’re planning okay?”

“Sure.” She said, shrugging her shoulders and walking over to Jeff’s parents.

I don’t understand. Charlotte’s acting as if she has never done this before. It’s ridiculous. There’s no reason for her to be acting this way. It’s not as if I actually did anything to her. Well… maybe I could be a little less rude. He thought, turning his head slightly to look at her. She did look a lot less cheerier than she used to.

Once they had finished in the grooms’ quarters, Jackie, the wedding planner brought them to see the bride. She was in a flurry in anticipation for the ceremony. It was difficult getting her to become calm enough to take pictures. Joe tried talking to her but it seemed to make her more nervous.

“Charlotte, please, do something.” He pleaded. “If we don’t get pictures soon we’re going to hold up the ceremony and Jackie will not be pleased.”

“Alright. I’ll see what I can do.” She said, putting a hand on his shoulder and walking toward the bridal party.

As she talked Joe started to think of how he should lighten up with her. Make her feel more comfortable otherwise this job wouldn’t go smoothly. His eyebrows rose as he saw the bride calming down and getting into position for the next few photographs. Charlotte beamed as she walked back over towards Joe.

“Wow, thank you.” he said, getting the camera ready.

“No problem. She really just needed some talking to.” She said with a shrug as she stood next to Joe.

“Really, I appreciate it.” Joe said, snapping a picture and then glancing over at her, giving her a smile.

“Anytime. You know, Joe… I really look up to your photography. I aspire to reach the level you have… that’s why I always ask you what to do.”

“Wow. Thanks, Charlotte.”

****

“That was a beautiful ceremony.” Charlotte said as they meandered through the crowd at the reception.

“Yeah, it was.”

“Was Nick and Faith’s like that?”

“Sort of. I don’t really remember.” He said, trying to shrug it off. It was a lie; he remembered every detail and remembered wishing it was him and not Nick.

“It was only two months ago!” she said with a laugh.

“Yeah I know but sometimes things become a blur.” He said, brushing it off as he took a picture of a lot of people on the dance floor.

“I just can’t wait to get married.” Charlotte said with a sigh.

“Yeah,” Joe said, looking down at the floor. “Hey… do you want to dance?”

“What?” she asked, looking over at him.

“Do you want to dance.” He said laughing as he took her hand, leading her to the floor. He slung his camera over his shoulder and put a hand on her waist.

“This is nice.” She said quietly as they twirled around on the dance floor. She looked up into his eyes to see him smiling at her.

“It’s not terrible.” He joked and she blushed and looked down.

“Joe?” she asked, glancing back up at him.

He silently waited for her to say something as her eyes darted back and forth across his face. Suddenly she leaned forward on her toes and her lips were on his. His eyes stayed frozen in shock as he processed what was happening before he gently pushed her away.

“Charlotte,” he started with a sigh.

“I’m sorry.” She said, putting a hand over her face and quickly walking away. Joe groaned before following her off of the dance floor.

“Charlotte, wait,” he said, wrapping his fingers around her wrist before she made her way out the door. She didn’t look at him but her muscles relaxed and he led her over to the duvet against the wall and they sat down.

“Please, just let me go.” She whispered.

“Hey,” he said, turning her face towards his. “Look at me. You’re a really nice girl, Charlotte. I’m sorry about what happened at my house. I know you have feelings for me but I don’t share those feelings. The one person I have feelings for… I can never have.”

“Why not?” she whispered looking up at him, her eyes shining from her fallen tears. Joe sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

“If I tell you… you have to keep it between us. No one knows this.” He said and she nodded. “I’m in love with Faith.”

“Oh my God.” She whispered, her eyes widening in surprise. “But…”

“I’ve loved her since the first day I met her.” He explained. “I knew she was the one but… Nick got to her first. There have been times where I’ve felt that she feels the same way but then she said yes to Nick’s proposal and then she comes to me asking how to fix something between them. I just don’t know…”

“Don’t worry,” she said, putting a hand on his shoulder. “I won’t tell anyone.”