Love Is Only a Myth

I anxiously sat on Chris’ bed waiting for Anthony to return from his date with London, Mike and Leah. Chris told me that it probably wouldn’t be a good idea in case Anthony decided to extend his and London’s date but I didn’t care. I need to talk to him and talk to him now. If I went back to my dorm, I would have talked myself out of talking to him. I did go back to my dorm so that I could get his belt. Just in case I chickened out, I would have an excuse for being here and I would never have to look at that belt again.

Luckily, since Chris was there he kept me entertained. We talked and joked around as we always do when we hang out.

The time began to fly by and I became more nervous. What if he went back to her dorm? There’s no way I could make it through the night without asking Leah what happened on the date. She would probably raise suspicions and tell Eric. If Eric found out then he would ask me why I wanted to know what happened. Then I would have to tell him that I was only using him to—

My thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the door opening. I immediately turned my head away from the TV and look at the door. Anthony walked inside…alone; yes no London after party. He immediately met my gaze.

“What are you doing here?” he questioned.

“Umm…I….wanted to bring your belt back” I replied. Chris nudged me in my side. I looked at him and saw him holding out the belt for me to take to him. I grabbed it and walked over to him. I held out the belt for him to take.

He looked down at the belt then up at Chris. “You told her didn’t you?”

“Yup” Chris stood up and walked over to us. He started pushing us out of the door until we were both in the hallway. “Now you two are going to talk. Oh and call first before you come back from wherever because I might be busy” he said with a wink.

I rolled my eyes once he shut the door. I turned to face Anthony who was surprisingly looking at me.

“You want some ice cream?” he asked. Does this guy honestly think that ice cream is going to solve everyone of my problems?

“Sure why not” I said with a shrug.

We started walking with silence hanging over us. As usual, the silence was comfortable. I don’t think there has ever been an awkward silence between us. Well there will definitely be one when I tell him about the reason for my status with Eric, that’s for sure.

We soon left the building and continued walking. It was dark outside and the moon was a crescent. I love crescent moons; they’re just so different. It’s like a metaphor; you can only find/ understand some of it. Since you can only see part of the moon this makes since right. Sometimes I think too much.

I started walking in the direction of the cafeteria when I noticed that Anthony wasn’t following me. I stopped and turned around to find him smirking and watching me. I folded my arms across my chest. “Aren’t we going to get ice cream?”

“I didn’t mean there”

“Well how was I suppose to know, I’m not a mind reader”

He simply smirked and started walking in another direction, I followed suit.

Before I knew it, we were in the school’s parking lot near the dean’s office. “Where are we going?”

He didn’t reply, he just continued to walk, so I continued to follow. I looked up an noticed gray clouds forming in the sky. I guess it’s going to rain. We soon reached his car (a black 2009 BMW X6). I was in complete awe. “How can you afford this?”

“My family owns a boarding school, remember,” he said while unlocking the car.

“Oh yeah” I said while opening the door.

He laughed and climbed inside the car. He started the engine and we soon pulled off campus. It amazed me how easy it was for us to sneak/drive off campus. We drove for about 15 minutes making small talk as we always did. I didn’t mind though, it was actually distracting me from telling him the real reason behind Eric and me.

Soon he stopped driving. I looked out the window and noticed that we were parked on the street. I didn’t notice how long I had been looking out the window until I saw Anthony. He opened the door. I nodded and stepped out.

“We have to walk a little to get there,” he said. I simply nodded. I knew that the closer we got to the place, the closer I would be to telling him the truth.

We walked for a good five minutes with a comfortable silence hanging over us. We soon reached an ice cream parlor at the end of the block. Anthony opened the door for me; I said thanks and walked in.

So after we got our ice cream (a banana spilt, with strawberry, vanilla, and chocolate) we sat down in the back of the parlor. I immediately began eating some of the ice cream, trying to avoid the subject as long as I could.

“So?” he asked.

I looked up at him with a spoonful of ice cream in my mouth.

“Are you going to say anything about the….incident?”

I swallowed my ice cream. “There’s not much that I can say. I still don’t remember it” I honestly replied. I wished that I had remembered it so that I would know if the kiss was good or not. I’ve been told that I can be an extremely sloppy kisser when I was drunk, but that was only on occasions. Thinking about sloppily kissing him made me nervous.

“You honestly don’t remember it?” he questioned while looking at me. I shook my head no before eating some more ice cream.

“I mean” I began “Alcohol makes people do a lot of strange things. It honestly probably wasn’t that good anyway, right?”

He mumbled something under his breath that I didn’t quite catch but I didn’t push any further. We continued to eat ice cream in silence. Suddenly Anthony’s phone vibrated in his pocket. He set his spoon down in the strawberry ice cream and pulled out his phone. I noticed that he was reading something on his phone, so he must have gotten a text. He put his phone away once he was done and picked up his spoon.

“Chris said that you have something that you wanted to tell me,” he said. I started choking on my ice cream as soon as the words left his mouth. “You okay?” he asked as I stopped choking. I simply nodded not ready to speak. Note to self: kill Chris later. “So what was it?”

“Well…you see…what had happened was,” I said. I forced myself to give a small laugh. Anthony raised his eyebrows and gave me a confusing look. “It’s actually a pretty funny story once you think about it. You know how I’m friends with benefits with Eric right?” I question. I noticed him tense up as he nodded his head. “Well there’s a reason behind that…” I trailed off at the end. I scooped some chocolate ice cream and a piece of a banana into my mouth. Anthony motioned for me to continue while eating some more ice cream. “I kinda sorta wanted to” I paused and took a deep breath. “Make you mad,” I mumbled under my breath.

“So you wanted to make me jealous?” I could here the smirk in is voice although I wasn’t looking at him.

“No” I said while looking at him.

He rolled his eyes and ate some more ice cream. “Whatever helps you sleeps at night”

“I’m serious,” I said trying to convince myself more than him. I was actually starting to believe that I wanted to make him jealous. If I wanted to make him, jealous that means that I would have to like him, and I don’t…right?

“Hey I said whatever helps you sleep at night,” he said while raising his hands in defense. I rolled my eyes and ate some more ice cream. “But does Eric know that you’re only using him?” I shook my head no. “You know that you have to tell him,” My head snapped up so that I was looking at him.

I had completely forgotten that I would have to tell Eric. How could I break it to him that I used him? How could you possible tell someone that loves you (or is under the impression that they can ever be in love) that not only do you not love them back (because it doesn’t exist) but you used them for your own personal gain. You can’t, there’s no way to tell someone that. “I know,” I mumbled.

I was surprised by how he just seemed to shrug the subject off. He’s probably just doing that for my benefit, but either way, I appreciate it. I didn’t like thinking about breaking the bad news to Eric.

We ate our ice cream talking and laughing the entire time. I think that’s something that I like about being around Anthony, I could just be myself around him and I was always comfortable. He just seemed to be so relaxed, unless he was mad. The only thing that worried me was that he always acted like this when no one else was around. Whenever I felt close to him, it was when we were alone; when he wasn’t being extremely sexy and cocky, yes, I just said sexy but can you blame me.

We heard a crack of thunder outside. “I guess that’s our cue to leave” Anthony said while standing up. I followed suit. He grabbed the trash and threw it away as we walked past the trash can. I shivered as the cold air hit my arms. I suddenly wished that I had brought a jacket.

Anthony saw me shiver and put his arms around my shoulders, pulling me into him. I don’t know what came over me but I blushed slightly. I was glad that it was dark outside so that he couldn’t see me. Lightning flashed in the sky causing me to jump. I felt Anthony chuckled against me.

“It’s not that funny” I said while blushing even more. This time I’m sure that he could see me since we were walking under a street light.

He suddenly stopped walking. I did too since I was under his arm. He took his arm from around my shoulders and regrettably, his warmth left me. He turned around and faced me. “Hey do you mind if I try something?” he said barely above a whisper. I gave him a confusing look and raised my eyebrows at him. What exactly was he going to do that he needed to ask for my permission? I simply shrugged in response.

He took a step towards me so that he was dangerously close. I could feel my breathing quicken in response. He gently cupped my face, and began to trance circles onto my face with his thumbs. I loved the feel of him being close to me and caressing my face. Wait, wait what am I saying. I can’t like this, I shouldn’t like this, and I won’t like this.

He slowly began to lean in until I could feel his breath on my lips. No, no, no this can not be happening. I closed my eyes anticipating what was coming next. I wanted him to kiss me yet I didn’t at the same time. I felt his lips graze mine. I wanted more than that. Even his lips slightly touching mine sets me on fire. Oh just forget it.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him full on. A chill ran down my spine, fireworks went off in my head the whole shebang. I sighed in content. It was better than Eric’s, it was better than anything I could have ever imaged. Our lips moved perfectly in sync as if they were molded for each other. It was filled with passion and hunger, as if he had been waiting for this forever. At that moment I didn’t want anyone else, everything just felt right with Anthony.

And I never wanted that kiss to end.