The Life of An American Orphan.

Jen’s P.O.V
My face crunch up in disgust as I pull out a cleaning wipe and wipe Dylan’s butt free of poop, I open the trash bucket besides the changing table and take out a new diaper and put it on the baby. I then fix his clothes and look at the baby right in the eyes.

“Where are you hiding the 50 year old man that poop’s in your diaper?” I ask.

Dylan looked at me silently for a second before he let out a giggle and waved his arms up and down.

I laughed and then made my way out of the room and into the common room where they keep the babies.

“I’m sorry about your parents” I whispered in his ears before I kissed his forehead and then sat him down in one of the many jolly jumpers, he immediately started to jump around and giggle.

See when Dylan was only a few months old his mom had gotten crazy or something and killed his dad, then a few minutes later after giving him a bottle of milk she shot herself in the head leaving poor Dylan crying in the kitchen. He was found a couple of hours later by the police, the neighbor had called because she kept hearing constant crying and was worried. God bless her soul.

There’s a lot of sick parents out there I can tell you that.

“Naww, aren’t you adorable” I said as I got down on my knees in front of him and took both of his small hands in mine as I helped him jump a little higher making him go from giggling to laughing which made me giggle.

“I am so glad he’s not our age, then I would have to be afraid he would have stole you away from me.” I hear Matt say from behind me making me jump a little.

I turn around and see him leaning on the doorframe with his arms crossed over his chest and a smirk on his face.

I laugh softly “I can say the same for you” I say and motion to Emily who is clinging on his left leg.

She looks at me with a big innocent smile and I can see her clutching his leg tighter making both of us laugh.

Matt uncrosses his arms and un-clutch Emily from his leg and the lift her up from the ground and hold her, she kisses his cheek.

“I love you Mattie” She says still with a big smile on her face.

He kisses her cheek “I love you too Emily” He say back which make her hide her face in her hands and giggle.

I pout and let out a sigh “You’re not going to steal my boyfriend are you Emily?” I ask and she looks at me with a real thinking face before she lets out a small breath and then got Matt to set her down, she walked over to me and motioned for me to get to her height then she leaned in closer and whispered in my ear.

“I promise I won’t steal him but you can obviously see that the guy has a thing for me and I don’t want to hurt him” She whispered seriously and it took me everything in my body not to fall on the floor and laugh.

“You’re right, I’m sorry I thought otherwise” I said with an equal serious expression on my face.

“It’s cool” She said and kissed my cheek before she ran out of the room.

“What did she say?” Matt asks as he comes closer and then gives me a hug.

I pull away after a few seconds and look at him “I can’t tell you, girl talk” I say with a smile on my face and then I let out a small laugh remembering what the small girl said.

“What’s up party people?” Sarah asks coming into the room giving Matt a nod.

“Ready to go?” Matt asks and looks at both of us.

I nodded and me and Matt started to slowly leave the room while Sarah ran out like her ass was on fire. Matt looked amused and I chuckled.

“I bet she went into our secret stash of chocolate” I said making Matt laugh a little.

We walked out to the car and Sarah complimented Matt on how ‘smooth’ it looked. After Matt thanked her we all got in the car and Matt started to drive.

“So, where are we going?” Matt asked as he stopped at a red light.

“We can go wherever you want to go, but the other will be waiting for us at IHOP” Sarah said leaning forward from where she sat in the middle in the back seats.

“Great, IHOP it is then” Matt said and turned to the right after the red light turned green.

It didn’t take long until we were parked outside the restaurant. We all got out of the car and just as we got to the front door Jimmy came running out and threw himself at Sarah. They immediately started to try and suck each other faces off so me and Matt just walked past them and into IHOP, we searched the whole restaurant and Matt must have seen the group because he took my hand and led me to the corner back and yep there they were. They all yelled out some kind of hi and I noticed a new girl sitting at the table.

Emily that was sitting at the right end shoved Brian further in and then scooted herself closer to him, Matt motioned with his hand for me to get in first which I did and then he slid in beside me.

“Guys, this is my girlfriend Robyn” Zacky said and motioned to the girl that had a pretty smile on her face.

“Hi, it’s nice to meet you” She said and gave us a nod.

“Nice to meet you too” Matt said and gave her a smile, I nodded mimicking his smile.

Seconds later Jimmy and Sarah came to the table and sat down besides Johnny and his girlfriend. The waitress the came to our table and took our orders which was pretty much the same, let’s just say that IHOP has awesome pancakes.

We all ate and had a great time, Zacky’s girlfriend was really nice and she spoke sarcasm fluently something I loved about her. Speaking of girlfriends, Maria looked a little out, she was always on her phone and laughed at some text she got but never told us anything. I don’t really think anyone besides me noticed because they just went on like everything was ok but I think I saw curiosity in Johnny’s eyes.

I shook my head getting rid of the thoughts as the waitress came back with the bill, which is when I remembered that I had thrown my wallet on the bed and not in my hello kitty purse. I looked towards Sarah to see if she had any but she was turned from me and talking to Zacky.

“What’s up?” Matt whispered in my ear making me jump a little.

I looked at his confused face and I took a deep breath.

“I forgot my wallet” I whispered back not wanting anyone to hear.

“I got you covered” He said with a smile as he laid out money over the bill as the other guys did the same.

“I can pay you back” I said as everyone got up from the table and started to walk to the door and out to the parking lot.

“Hey, I’m your boyfriend I’m supposed to do this” He said as he intertwined our finger and then put on his aviators as the June sun burned on the concrete.

“Still, it feels weird” I said as we walked towards the car.

He just laughed it away and kissed my temple and all of us gathered around in a small circle in front of the cars.

“Where to now?” Emily asked while leaning her head on Brian’s shoulder.

“The beach?” Johnny asked.

Almost everyone grunted.

“It’s June, summer vacation is almost here, don’t you think we’ll spend the whole summer there?” Matt asked and looked at Johnny who then held up both of his arms as if saying he surrendered.

“The mall?” Maria asked and everyone nodded while Emily, Sarah and Zacky’s girlfriend jumped up and down while clapping their hands.

“Ok, who’s driving with who?” Jimmy asked.

“I got two free seats” Matt said.

“Ok, Jimmy and Sarah go with Matt and Jen and I can take the rest since I have my dad’s car” Brian said and everyone nodded.

“Let’s synchronize our watches!” Jimmy shouted, it was quiet for a few seconds until everyone just shook their head and walked to their car.

I gave Jimmy a small smile and showed him my watch, I pushed a random button and a big smile got on his face and then he put up both of his thumbs and we walked to the car.

I sat up front with Matt while Jimmy climbed in the back with Sarah.

LATERLATERLATERLATERLATER

“Best dress i have ever bought this year!” Maria says as we walk out of Forever 21. The guys stood up from the benches they had been sitting on and met us in the middle.

“I’m hungry” Zacky said as he stretched.

“You’re always hungry” Robyn said and rubbed Zacky’s belly making us chuckle.

“I’m a growing boy” He replied with a small pout as we started to walk down the mall.

“Psh, you haven’t grown an inch since 9th grade dude” Brian said and we all snickered.

“Pretzel!” Jimmy shouted and ran over to the pretzel cart that was standing on the side.

“Dude!” Zacky shouted and let go of the hold he had on Robyn’s hand and ran after Jimmy.

“Hey guys!” I hear two cheery voices from behind us and I immediately knew who it was.

I heard the three guys groan and then we all turned around and surely there was Val and Isabella both of their arms filled with shopping bags.

None of us really answered them, we just looked at them really weird and I saw Matt, Brian and Johnny glare at the girls, Emily looked like she was about to punch them, Maria just stood there and poor Robyn had no idea who these evil spawns of the devil was.

Val laughed like someone has just pulled a great joke “Anyway, what are you guys doing here?” She asked looking at Matt while batting her eyes.

“Just chillaxing” Emily replied and gave both of them fake smiles which they happily returned.

“Well, we were just going to take a snack and wondered if you would like to join us” Isabella said and looked at Brian, I guess she’s over Matt or Val managed to talk her out of liking him and she converted to Brian.

Sarah laughed loudly “Yeah, ‘cause we want to sit watching you guys NOT eat a salad” She said and wiped away a fake tear. Both of the girls gave her a glare.

“We don’t eat salads anymore” Isabella said.

“Yeah, salads are so last year” Val said like it was the most obvious thing in the world and then laughed.

Robyn looked at me with confusion on her face and I just shrugged.

“What do you eat now then?” Robyn asked confused.

“Probably poor souls and babies” Jimmy said coming up from behind us with Zacky on his heels.

The two girls gave him a look that could kill but Jimmy just shrugged it off and handed everyone a pretzel.

“Actually we eat brussel sprouts covered in low calorie cottage cheese” Isabella said while flinging some of her hair over her shoulder and then put both of her hands on her hips.

I scrunched my face in disgust “They sell that here?” I ask.

“No, we bring it with us” Val said with a scowl on her face and then took up a Tupperware box that was filled with something green covered in something white.

“And you eat that?” Robyn asks pointing towards the box.

“Duh!” Isabella said and then I hear Robyn whisper ‘gross’ under her breath.

“So, What do you say?” Val asks.

“You know, we would really love to join you guys but we were just about to leave, maybe next time” Matt declined politely.

“I’ll keep you too that” Val said quickly with a pointy look in her eyes.

“You do that” Matt said as his left hand rested on my lower back and started to lead me in the direction of the exit doors.

We all gathered in front of the cars again.

“That was kind of freaky” Robyn said making us laugh.

“I would say that’s them on a good day” Brian said and Emily nodded.

“Trust me, you will see worse” Sarah said and everyone said ‘yeah’

“So now that we can’t stay at the mall, where should we go?” Zacky asked.

“I don’t really feel like doing anything” Jimmy said and sat down on the ground with both of his legs crossed in an Indian style.

“Aww babe, did those horrible teenage girls suck the fun out of you?” Sarah asked in a baby voice as she crouched down in front of him.

Jimmy pouted and then nodded.

They are so adorable together.

Sarah leaned into his ear and whispered something to him. His eyes widened and he nodded, he quickly stood up and grabbed her hand and started running.

“Dude, where you going?” Matt asked.

“We’re going to my place” Jimmy shouted as he kept running.

“I’m your ride remember?” Matt then shouted after him.

“We don’t have time for that we’ll take the bus or a stallion duck!” Jimmy shouted and soon they were so far away we knew they wouldn’t be able to hear us no matter what.

We all just stood there and watched as Sarah and Jimmy disappeared around the corner.

“Ah, young love” I said and we chuckled.

“So, what should the—“Johnny was about to ask until Zacky interrupted him.

“HOLY SHIT, WHAT TIME IS IT?” Zacky shouted.

“Uuuuuh, 4:35 pm… Why?” Emily asked.

“Fuck, we need to go” Zacky said and started to drag Robyn away to the main road probably to grab a cab.

“We do?” She asked looking clueless.

“The dinner we’re having with your parents, the one that’s at 4:20 pm, yeah that’s today” Zacky explained as he put his arm out to hail a cab.

“Shit, that’s right” Robyn said as a cab pulled up, she gave the rest of us a smile and waved while Zacky shouted something none of us could figure out.

“Who makes dinner plans at 4:20? Why not 4:30?” I ask confused.

“Maybe her parents are 4:20 people” Emily says with a shrug.

Maria looked around “Well I should head home, it’s late” She says and kissed Johnny’s cheek.

“It’s only like 4:30” Johnny said and Maria laughed gently.

“Still, I have homework and a little sister to babysit” She said and waved.

“I thought she had a little brother?” Emily asked and nudged Johnny who was looking at a Maria that was walking back to the mall.

“She does” He replied with confusion on his face.

I looked as Maria walked into the mall and started to run. I just shrugged my shoulders and turned around to the remaining five. Matt put his arm around my waist and I leaned into him and he kissed me on top of my head.

“What now?” Matt asks and everyone shrugs.

“I have no idea” Brian said and looked at Emily.

“I wanna go to the arcade, pleeeease Bri-bear” She said with big smile and clung to his arm like a small child, I chuckled and shook my head.

“Fine, you guys wanna join?” Brian asked.

“I’m game!” Johnny said making Emily laugh.

“You said game, and we’re going to an arcade, that’s awesome” She said and kept laughing.

You gotta love her.

“Do you want to go?” Matt asked and I thought about it.

Going to the arcade costs money, I don’t have it and Matt shouldn’t spend more money.

“Actually I’m kind of tired but you should go if you want to” I said quietly not wanting them to hear.

Matt nodded but still kept his arm around my waist “I think we’re going to stand this one out guys, next time though” He said with a smile.

“Ok dude, I’ll see you guys later” Brian said and they both did this man hug thingy, which Johnny also did while Emily ran over and almost knocked him over, while I got hugs from all of them.

We all got into our cars and drove out separated way.

“What do you want to do now?” Matt asked while looking at the road.

I just shrugged my shoulders and looked outside the window and watched as the scenery went by.

“Why didn’t you want to go to the arcade?” Matt then asked and took his eyes of the road because I could feel him staring at me.

I let out a small sigh “Because an arcade costs money which I don’t have at the moment and I don’t want you to spend money on me.” I said and looked from the side of the window and to Matt who then looked back at the road.

“Why not?” He asked.

“Because I have my own money Matt, I’m not poor you know” I said loudly starting to feel angry and slightly guilty.

This time Matt sighed “And I do know that babe but why can’t I spoil you a little? You’re my girlfriend and want to do this.” He said calmly.

“Yeah well I don’t want you too so please stop!?” I said loudly and rested my head on the window feeling the familiar lump in my throat and tears in my eyes.

“Babe, what’s this really about?” He asked and looked at me for a few seconds.

A single tear made its way down my left cheek not catching Matt’s eye but the one that ran down my right cheek did.

“Why are you crying?” He asked and took a quick look at the road before looking at me again.

I shook my head as more tears started to flow down my cheeks, I turned my head so it was completely away from Matt’s eyes and I started to cry even more. My breathening started to get quicker and I starter to let out sobs.

The car slowly stopped and I heard Matt pull out the car keys and then got out of the car, I hear some small running and then my car door was opened but I didn’t move. Matt got down on his knees in front of me and tried to catch my eyes which I avoided at all cost.

“Come on babe, talk to me. What’s wrong?” He asked and I could hear the concern in his voice.

I let out a few sobs before I let my head rest against his shoulder, he got up from his knees and undid my seatbelt and the lifted me out from the car. I heard the car door slam and Matt started walking, I didn’t look up once so I didn’t know where we were all I heard was a door opening, Matt taking off his shoes and more walking.

I hear a new door open and close just two seconds after it was opened and then Matt sat down. I lifted my head so my chin was resting on his shoulder and then I opened my eyes and I was met with Matt’s bed.

Matt started to gently stroke my back and I lifted my head and rested my forehead on his shoulder.

“I can’t do this anymore” I whispered.

My eyes were open but I couldn’t see anything, all I could make out was the line of where Matt’s t-shirt arm ended and I could see the outline of his tattoo but it was all dark. I took a deep breath with my nose and Matt’s smell calmed me down. It smelled like his house, some cologne and smoke.

“What can’t you do anymore?” He whispered back.

There was a small silence.

“The lies, the secrets, everything” I whispered as even more tears made it down my cheeks.

Matt stopped stroking my back and suddenly his hand was gone but it was soon connected to my chin, well his point and thumb were softly grabbing my chin and bringing my face away from his shoulder and in front of his face.

I saw concern written all over his face and he kept looking at me like he was trying to read me. There was a silence yet again, he was looking at me and I looked right back a little exhausted from all the crying which now had slowed down. Then he suddenly gave me gentle kiss on my cheeks kissing the tears away and then looked at me.

“Talk to me” He said quietly.

So I did. I told him about me growing up, about my life at the orphanage, my life with different foster parents, how I felt like something bad was always going to happen, the pain that I constantly feel in my chest, the emotional pain I only can get rid of by hurting myself, I told him about my insecurities and how lost I sometimes feel.

It had taken a good few hours to get it all out, Matt hadn’t said anything else but comforting words, telling me it’s ok, to let it all out, to take my time and that not everything needed to be said today. But I just happened when I first started I couldn’t stop, I couldn’t hold anything in, I exploded.

I fell asleep with Matt holding me. I was so exhausted from all the crying that I just passed out a few minutes after I had told Matt everything. The last thing I remembered was Matt lying back on the bed still holding me, I bawled my fist in his shirt afraid to let him go and then I fell asleep.