I Believe That You Belong to Me

Acerielle didn’t hate me

She didn’t run from me. She didn’t report me. Instead she did something I know do not deserve…she didn’t hate me.

I felt the constraint of my heart relax about an hour before I had arrived at the school. Acerielle no longer held any animosity towards me, as a consequence, my heart no longer felt so confined, yet my body still ached I ached because she needed to be back in my arms. I ached because she wasn’t mine. I ached because she would never be mine.

It took a lot of energy on my part, to not rip off the door from Bella’s truck and pull Acerielle from it when they had arrived at the school. It took even more energy to not run after her when she and Bella parted ways, and more still to refrain from telling her exactly how I felt. It had become quite the challenge to keep my feelings to myself, and Alice’s relentless criticisms made the issue all the more difficult.

Acerielle got in my car and inwardly I reeled. Had I still been human, I have no doubt my heart would have been pounding. I was still reveling over the fact that she had not rejected me. I got in after her and tried to ignore the fact that she hated my smell. I could not let her go through the day at school looking like she did. She looked worn. Her eyes looked like she'd been punched at least twice, and the way she sluggishly walked only made me feel all the more guilty for revealing what I was.

I knew it wasn’t entirely my fault that Acerielle had not gotten any sleep, for she is rarely able due to the misguiding of her despicable mother, but I did play a big role. Even if she does claim she is no longer afraid.

I turned on the highway and continued to leave her questions about our destination unanswered. We rode in silence after she had finally given up and halfway through the ride (which wasn’t long for I’d been speeding) Acerielle fell asleep.

For the first time in decades, I slowed down. Not to eighty or ninety as I had done for Bella, but below even the legal speed of the highway. I didn’t want the ride to end.

I knew that once the car stopped she’d awaken and I would no longer be able to so openly stare at her. I wasn’t ready to stop the longing I felt from seeing her lips part slightly in bliss or ready stop the urge to brush the loose strands of hair behind her ear, or even the nearly agonizing desire to pull her onto my lap and feel her warmth. I just wasn’t ready.

But the fiends that resided deep within me also did not want the ride to end. The blood lusting demon within had my eyes constantly flickering to her exposed neck willing me to take a bite and swish what is rightfully his along my tongue. The other and much more recent demon, had my eyes wandering all over her body, noting the size of her breasts, the curve of her hips, the length of her legs and her lips…the full lips that could easily fit around my—I pushed down harder on the gas pedal.

I tried pushing the unholy thoughts from my mind and willed her to stay asleep. I couldn’t risk her seeing my ever growing excitement.

I took the exit much faster than I should have, and sped down the road to our destination. As soon as I had the car in park, I jumped out without waiting to see if Acerielle was awake. I raced through the woods as far away from her as was safe and pulled my pants down.

I mentally cursed myself as my hand worked. I had been doing this quite often in the past month, but the action still felt foreign to me. I hadn’t had to do it much as a human, or at least I do not remember having to and as a vampire, up until recently I had not felt this strong of a desire. I had never thought of taking Bella’s virginity or riding myself of my own, but with Acerielle the lust I felt was nearly as strong as my adoration for her. I wanted her to be mine…I needed her to be mine.

I bit my lip as a sigh of pleasure tried pushing through and pulled up my pants ashamed…a vampire who has to masturbate…I was much more than pathetic.

I ran back to my car and breathed a sigh of relief when I found her in her same position and asleep. I took the stroke of luck and walked into the surprise I had for her and cleansed my hands in its bathroom…I would never allow myself to touch her with soiled hands.

I walked back out to the car and shut it off. The motion did nothing to stir her and neither did taking her out of the car and carrying her up the steps of her surprise. I opened a room door of her surprise and placed her gently on one of the beds.

That is when she decided to wake up.

Acerielle jumped up in alarm and looked all around the room in panic, but when her eyes landed on me she calmed down, however ironic that is.

“Where are we?” She asked her voice begging for more sleep.

“It’s an abandoned cottage I found a few years ago. I come here sometimes to be with my own thoughts.”

“Why would you bring me to your secret hideout? I’d understand Bella, but me?” She rubbed her eyes before laying back down, her eyes still focused on me.

“My secret hideout is elsewhere, in which Bella has been,” I said wishing I had shared my meadow with her and not with a girl I never truly considered mine.

“Oh, so this is like…a secret club house then?” She shot up again, the sudden excitement in her voice so adorable I couldn’t fight my smile.

“Yes.” She gave a delighted out-of character squeal, something I would have found to be annoying on any other girl, but for Acerielle it ignited the same feeling as her incredible laugh.

“This is so cool! Don’t make fun of me, but I’ve always wanted a secret club house. I just never had a place or even any possible club members.”

“Well you’ve got one with me, we can work on the handshake and password later.” Acerielle giggled and in my dazed state, I joined her on the bed.

“Let’s play an educational game?” She suggested after a while of comfortable silence.

“I thought you hated education,” I asked a tad bit confused.

“I do, but this all involves you and vampires.”

“I’m listening.”

“It’s called: “Myth or Truth”. I ask a question, you tell me whether or not it is true.”

“What about you? I don’t get to ask you any questions?” I asked not liking the sound of this one-sided game.

“You can, but it’ll be boring to learn about me.” I could think of many reasons as to why that wasn’t true, but I didn’t tell her that.

“I can say the same.”

“Ok fine, ask your questions, but I go first.”

“Ask away.” I rolled onto my back facing her.

“Can you turn into a bat?”

“Myth, when’s your birthday?”

“April 25th, do you sleep in a coffin?” The fact that I had to wait just about a year to get her a birthday gift annoyed me more than it should have.

“Myth, I don’t sleep at all. Favorite color?”

“Really you don’t sleep at all. So when you asked me each morning-

“I told you, I like your reactions. Favorite color?” I interrupted, trying not to laugh.

“Teal, Jade, Magic mint, pretty much anything in that color family. Garlic?”

“Myth, and before you ask the same with holy water, crosses, wood and silver bullets. The only thing that can harm me is another vampire and of course your rejection of me. Favorite number?”

“Thirteen. It’s as unlucky as I am. You took all the rest of my questions and I’m too tired to think of anymore right now.”

“You aren’t unlucky. We’ll continue later but for now…who do you like?” I knew what she was going to say before she even thought it, but I needed to know whom I had to kill.

“That’s kind of a girly grade school question don’t you think?” Acerielle laid back on the bed a small smirk on her lips, saying exactly what I had predicted.

“I want to know,” I urged. I had no right to ask, I had made a personal vow to not pursue her and to stay out of her love life, but the potential jealousy had me thinking murderous thoughts.

“N-no one.” I saw right through her lie. Not only did her heart speed up, but even as she tried pushing the thought away, I still saw it.

I had seen it before and it had caused every part of me to burn with rage, so much rage that I had scared her enough to cause her pain. I remember that day, the day I had kissed her hand and she’d run into Jasper.

Jasper

Of all the people she could take interest in. Of all the people she could feel no fear towards. She chose Jasper.

I had forced the memory away, but her recent thoughts brought it back. Acerielle had never gotten a chill of fear from Jasper’s presence. She did not think he smelled. She did not think his eyes resembled one’s urine, and she most certainly did not find his appearance to be strange in any way.

She liked him

The most dangerous of us, she viewed as an angel.

I had never felt such an intense hatred for anyone in all my years of existence.