The Little Things Give You Away

When Riley refused to leave I was so mad at him. I knew something like this would happen. It’s stupid. Why the hell didn't he listen to me? He should know by now that I know what’s best for him. I'm generally right, so why didn't he take my bloody word for it?

Now everyone’s convinced that he is gay. The story Nate’s been telling everyone is that he got a hard on and ran off to the bathroom to fix the little problem. And yeah, Nate did put emphasis on the word little.

Not everyone’s being an ass about it though. Ashley and Torrie are standing up to them and calling them all assholes for taking it that far. I'm guessing this will be another reason for Nate to hate Riley though. Seeing as Torrie’s mad with him, it’s unlikely that she’ll give him anything that he wants. In Nate’s eyes, that’s Riley’s fault and not his own.

After the scene that had just happened Nate got pissed off and took everyone outside to the garden, carrying a crate of beer out there with him. He’s not going to get over this anytime soon. There’s a good chance that he’ll start acting off with me as well.

Did you hear him before?

He didn't just say he was doing the ‘gay dares’ to test Riley, but he said he was doing it on me too. I'm not gay. I like Ry, yes, but that doesn’t mean anything. All friends like each other the way we do... Don’t they?

Oh whatever. I'm not gay and that’s final.

The only people that are still upstairs are me, Ashley, Torrie and Riley who’s still in the bathroom.

“Maybe you should go talk to him,” Ashley suggested shyly to me.

Oh as if it’s going to be that easy.

“He won’t want to talk to me,” I whispered.

Why would he? He knows I'm angry. He’s going to think it’s all his fault as well. I bet he hates me for putting him in a situation like this.

“He probably isn't crushing on you, Matt. Nate’s just being a jerk,” Torrie told me. Nate is being a jerk, but I partly wish that the jerk was right about this.

“I know,” I sighed.

“Don't be afraid of talking to him because some idiots think he likes you. It doesn’t matter what people think.”

“Yeah,” I whispered. I know all of this. I'm not dumb.

“And even if he does like you, it’s not like you’re gay so your rep’s fine,” she smiled.

“Just leave it Torrie!” I snapped this time. I don’t care about that...much. When I eventually realized that I shouldn’t be taking it out on her, I took a deep breath and apologized. “Look, I'm sorry.”

She smiled weakly at me and gave me a nod.

I'm just really mad over all of this. I should’ve made him leave. If I did then none of this would’ve ever happened.

“Ashley’s right though, you should speak to him.”

I know...

I took a few seconds and then built up the courage to go over to the bathroom door.

“Wish me luck,” I whispered before gently knocking on the door. “Hey Riley, it’s me: Matt,” I told him softly. “Can I come in?”

I waited for a few seconds before hearing some movement from inside and the lock sliding open. A few seconds later the door opened slightly so I carefully pushed it enough so I could fit through before shutting and locking it again.

Before turning around to face Riley, I took in a deep breath to prepare myself for this. I hate seeing him upset.

“Hey,” he sniffed, looking down at the floor shamefully.

His face was all red and blotchy and his eyes and nose were running. Ry was crying still now and it made me feel horrible. I was meant to be watching out for him.

“C-come here,” I told him nervously, feeling my own eyes tear up a little from the sight of him.

As he walked towards me I wrapped my arms around him and pulled him in so his body was pressed tightly against mine. I rested my chin on the top of his head and gently ran my hand up and down his back soothingly. His small frame was still shaking even though he’d had so long to calm down already.

“Shhh,” I whispered to him. “I'm here now... Everything’s going to be okay.”

I felt him nodding his head against my chest and I couldn’t help smiling as I felt his arms wrap around my waist. It felt so good having him in my arms like this. I only wish that it wasn't under these circumstances.

“Do you wanna talk?” I asked him quietly when I noticed his breathing evening out.

“No,” he sniffed.

“Okay then,” I told him quietly. “We don’t have to talk if you don’t want to.”

“Thanks.”

I love how we’ve been hugging for so long now. It feels so great. I prefer having him in my arms than anyone else in the world. Well, almost anyone. The only other person I wish I could hold would be my mum, but I know that’s never going to happen. Not unless someone comes up with some magical time machine anyway.

Riley is definitely the next best thing. You know what? I actually think I love him. Not in a gay way (I don’t think) but I adore everything about him. Just seeing him cheers me up. The only time seeing him makes me feel down is when that’s how he’s feeling. All I want to do when I see him like he is today is make him happy again.

“You know,” I whispered, “I wish you listened to me back there.”

When I said to him I could feel his body tense up a little bit.

“What d’you mean?” he asked, pushing away from me.

Wow, hold on a second. Why aren’t I being hugged anymore? Matt liked that hug man!

“Well... If we left like I said, then you’d be alright.”

“Yeah, you know what’s best for me, don’t you?”

“Kind of...”

“You know so much better than I do. I mean, how on earth would I make any decisions without you being there? I’d never cope with so much pressure on me!”

“Ry, just calm down,” I said, placing my hand on his arm but his quickly shook me off him. “You know I'm only trying to help you.”

“Control me more like,” he whispered.

“N-no.”

“You don’t think I can take care of myself, do you?” he asked, sounding offended.

“Correction, I know you can’t,” I explained to him. “I know your mum makes you do everything, but you not doing an amazing job-”

“WHAT WOULD YOU KNOW?” He snapped. “And how does my mum have anything to do with this?” he asked me, going slightly teary eyed again.

“Don’t cry, Ry,” I said calmly.

“Stop it,” he complained. “You always do this,” he squeaked out. “I can do stuff for myself. The only reason they’re so horrible to me is because you baby me so much.”

I stared at him for a few seconds without saying a word.

“So... this is my fault?” I asked him, raising an eyebrow.

“I didn't-”

“I get it,” I interrupted him, “you want me to stay out of your way. If that’ll make you happy, then fine!” I shouted. “You go do your thing and I’ll do mine,” I told him firmly before unlocking the door again and storming out.

“What happened?” Ashley asked when she saw me leaving.

I’d love to know what happened. One second we were hugging and it was the closest we’d been with each other. Then seconds later we were shouting and had our first fall out ever. I can’t believe this.

I just shook my head at her and marched downstairs to where the others were. They were still out in the garden and Torrie must’ve joined them while I was talking to Riley as I could see her and Nate kissing by the pool. They made up quickly. Too quickly.

“Hey, are you okay?” Brad asked me, grabbing hold of my shaking body. That’s right; I was so angry I was shaking.

Brad looked really worried now.

“Why do you guys pick on Riley so much?” I asked him, sounding really distressed over it.

“We don’t,” he insisted.

“Yes you do! Is it because of me?”

“I seriously don’t know what you’re on about dude,” Brad tried to tell me.

“It is me, isn't it? I do baby him too much. I just wanted him to fit in though Brad. I thought if I was close to him then you guys would be too, but noooo. You didn't like me having a friend who wasn't one of you so you go and make his life hell!”

“Matt, ranting to me won’t do anything.”

“I know that mate. Ry hates me now so there’s no chance this situation will get better.”

I noticed a slight smirk appearing on Brad’s face then. He so wants Riley out of the picture. They all do!

“Well you still have us,” he told me.

“Oh yey!” I smirked sarcastically. “That’s what I want: Friends who question my sexuality just because I’ve met someone nicer than they are!”

“Are you drunk?” Brad asked me.

“No I'm not actually! Some people can tell the truth and be sober!”

“Maybe you should leave,” Brad whispered.

“Ohhhh, so now you want me to go do you? God I love my friends!” I shouted.

“Matt you’re making a scene,” Brad whispered sharply as Nate walked over to find out what was going on.

A lot of people were looking at us now and it’s getting late so I knew I’d be annoying the neighbors as well.

“What’s happening?” Nate asked us.

“Matt’s angry and I think he should leave before he says something he’ll regret,” Brad explained.

I stayed quiet at this point as I tried to calm myself down. I’ve already gone too far with this. I’ve insulted my best friends and embarrassed all of us at the same time.

“I'm sorry,” I whispered, shocking them both.

“You calm now?” Nate asked me, obviously not wanting to kick me out. I'm one of his best friends.

“Yeah... Um, could you ignore what I said Brad?” I asked him shamefully. “Just got caught up in the moment...”

“Yeah,” he whispered. “No worries, it’s forgotten.”

Thank God for that. How many friends can you lose in one night anyway? I'm hoping I don’t wind up finding out.

“Do you wanna go upstairs and get a lie down?”Nate asked me, looking as worried as Brad did when he first grabbed hold of me before.

I took him up on his offer and made my way up to his guest room to have a rest. It was definitely needed. As soon as I closed my eyes I was out like a log.

***

My eyes flicked open in a room that I didn't recognize at first. It was one of Nate’s spare rooms. God, I wonder how long I’ve been up here. I glanced over at the digital clock on the side: 03:04. Brilliant.

I carefully clambered up out of the bed and tried to walk steadily out of the room. As I got closer to the landing the noises started to become clearer. The music was still playing and a few people must still be down there because I can definitely hear voices.

Taking my time I walked down the stairs. To be honest I was still half asleep so I had to be really careful to make sure I didn't fall. I've had bad falls on Nate’s staircase in the past. The things brutal!

Four people were sat on the floor in the living room, but none of them noticed my presence in the doorway. Nate, Brad, Jacey and, to my surprise, Riley were sat there, each with a can of something in their hands. Ry’s been drinking... I couldn’t stop the disappointed sigh escaping from me. I didn't want him having anything and I'm certain he wouldn’t have if he was in the right frame of mind. He wasn't though. He was upset and angry and it was because of me.

When I looked closer into the dark room I noticed the shot glasses on the floor in the middle of them. No way. Why would Riley play drinking games with them ?

“Guys,” I said as I awkwardly shuffled on my feet.

“Yooouree awakesss,” Riley slurred before hiccuping and then giggling at himself.

Jacey and Nate laughed at him.

They’re making a fool out of him! How could they?!

“How much has he had?” I asked them sternly.

“Too much,” Nate smirked at me. “I told him you wouldn't like it though.”

“He said you're not in charge of him and he makes his own choices so...What could we do?” Jacey asked, sounding as innocent as a slut can.

“Riley we’re going home,” I told him sharply as I grabbed his own to drag him up.

“S-stop Matttyyy,” he giggled. “I’mm sti-ill playyinggggg.”

“Matty,” Nate laughed.

“Seee Marrt, I'm funnneh.”

“Yeah. Hilarious,” I frowned as I tugged on his arm harder to make him stand up.

“You’re such a party pooper Matt,” Jacey frowned. “In more ways than one,” she winked.

I knew that was her subtle way of threatening me but I wasn't going to let it get to me. She can tell them I wasn't ready to have sex with her. I honestly don’t care. They can know I'm a virgin as well, as long as I get Riley out of here I'm fine.

“Don’t wannnna goooo,” Riley shouted as I lifted him up over my shoulder.

He was kicking and trying to force his way out of my grip but I was too determined to let him go. I didn't say goodbye to the three in the room. I just walked out the front door.

My house wasn't too far from Nate’s and seeing as I don’t have a car, walking is the only option I have.

“Why did you drink?” I asked quietly.

I wasn't really asking him though because I knew he wasn't in the condition to answer me properly.

“You’re v-very strong,” he stuttered a little.

“I know,” I sighed as I shuffled his weight around slightly so we were both more comfortable with the way I was holding him on my shoulders. “You comfy?” I asked him.

“Yesss,” he told me proudly. “You’ree comfy toooo.”

“Er...thanks Riley,” I said slowly. I shouldn’t really take him seriously when he’s this drunk.

“Imma sorry,” he told me suddenly.

He’s drunk, yes, but I know he wants to apologize. He seriously overreacted earlier.

“What for Rys?” I asked him, testing to see if it was just random words or something he actually wanted to tell me.

“Yooou know silly,” he laughed.

God his laugh was cute. I really need to stop thinking like this. It’s quite hard for me to stay in control now though. His ass is practically in my face due to how I'm carrying him. I'm only human.

When we got to my house I had to put him down so I could route through my pockets to find my keys. He wasn't very steady on his feet so I had to hold him really close. It was a nice close though.

As soon as I got him through the door and locked it shut, something happened that really caught me off guard.

He pushed me back against the wall and wrapped his arms around my neck. My heart was seriously racing in anticipation. What was he doing? Before I had time to give it any thought, he stepped up onto his tip toes and forcefully planted his lips against mine.

I closed my eyes tightly and for a moment I was actually expecting my heart to leap out of my chest.

His tongue licked slowly over my lips and my whole body felt overcome by pleasure.

“Riley,” I moaned quietly before gently pushing him away from me.

I can’t do this.

We locked eyes for a moment before he went and tried to kiss me again. This time I stopped him though. He looked hurt as we looked into each other’s eyes a further time. I can’t believe that just happened.

“Y-you’re drunk,” I whispered, shaking my head and looking at the ground as I tried to ignore the incredibly attractive boy in front of me.

My eyes were actually tearing up now. This is everything I’ve wanted and it’s going to be some drunken mistake. It’s not fair!

“Lo-ve you,” he hiccuped before placing his hand on my cheek and slowly stroking it.

I knew I was flushing bright red now, but I also knew that this wasn't real. It can’t be. Riley’s so drunk he’d tell a lamp post he was in love. But what if he does love me?

“I... I l-love you too,” I whispered weakly as I slowly leaned in and brushed my lips against his for a few brief seconds.

Even after such a short kiss I felt breathless. This is just incredible.

“Should...should I take you upstairs?” I asked him quietly.

I honestly had no idea what had come over me. Love?

“S-sure,” he smiled as I lifted him into my arms and carried him up the stairs.

I took him into my room and dropped him softly down onto my bed.

“I’ll be right back,” I told him.

My body was shaking all over as I thought about what could happen next. Dad told me that he keeps the condoms in the bottom draw in the bathroom. I'm sure you’d imagine that being an awkward conversation, but strangely, it wasn't.

I pulled the draw open and grabbed one of them out of the pack. I can’t believe I'm finally going to lose my v-card. It’s going to be with my best friend! Someone I’ve always wanted to be with.

I tiptoed quietly back into my room, getting excited already. However, as soon as I got in there I realized the smaller boy who was sprawled out on my bed wouldn't be ready for this tonight. Riley’s fast asleep.

I tried to hide my disappointment but I soon realized that having sex with Riley would’ve been way out of order. He’s drunk. I would’ve taken advantage of him. He’d hate me for it. Plus he might not remember any of this in the morning. And I'm not gay.

Him being asleep may be a blessing in disguise...

After a short period of me just watching him sleep, I changed into my pajamas and climbed into the bed beside him.

Will he remember any of this tomorrow?