Let's Get Where We're Going

Sleep had been a strange experience that Castiel didn't really know how to respond to. He eventually did succumb to it but he'd fought it for a good hour and a half after Kinsley fell asleep. It left them vulnerable, he thought. So he couldn't sleep! What a ridiculous concept. Creatures who had to sleep when doing such a thing could lead to danger. God really must not have been thinking when he made such a process.

Castiel began to stir as the smell of coffee wafted through the air. He would have a cup here and there, particularly when he was with the Winchesters. It helped keep them awake and it had always given Castiel a little more energy, even if he couldn't really tell because of his minuscule it was.

His eyes cracking open, Cas watched Kinsley for a moment before sitting up in the bed. There was a sort of ache in every part of his body, it made him scowl but this was nothing he hadn't experienced before. There was no need to let it affect his work. "How long have you been awake?" Castiel asked without really considering what such a sudden question would do.

“Dammit!” Kinsley gasped as Castiel abruptly spoke. Hadn’t he just been asleep? Amidst her yelling, she had fumbled with her phone, causing it to fall to the ground. She placed a hand over her heart, feeling it beating quite rapidly against her chest. “You scared the shit out of me Cas.” Her cheeks immediately turned pink and she looked away from him. She was sure that she had just made a complete fool out of herself.

When Kinsley finally gained her composure, she looked back up at him, offering him a small smile. “I uh,” she started, licking her bottom lip. “I’ve only been awake about fifteen minutes.” The coffee pot started beeping in concession, signaling that it was done brewing. She stood up and walked over to it, making herself a small cup. She looked over her shoulder at Cas, “Do you want me to make you a cup of coffee, or…? Are you hungry or anything?”

Castiel, alarmed when Kinsley shouted, moved to push himself to his feet, his eyes scanning around the room for whatever threat had alarmed her so much. Huffing when he realized what had startled her, Cas lowered himself back down onto the bed. He frowned a bit as he looked over to her, offering an apologetic smile. "My sincere apologies, I didn't intend on alarming you."

His gaze shifted over to the pot of coffee as it finished brewing. A small frown formed on his lips as he watched it, nodding slowly. "Yes, please... nothing in it? What is that called?"

Kinsley grinned to herself, thankful that her back was facing Castiel. She had always loved how innocent he was. But she also knew that the angel could be quite moody ever since he was able to start deciphering human emotions. “It would be just black coffee, Cas.” She said. “I like cream and sugar in mine.” She rambled. She poured Cas’ coffee and then made her own, making her way back over to him. She handed him the cup a small smile on her face.

“Here you go,” she said as she made herself comfortable on the bed once more.

Castiel thanked Kinsley as he took the cup of offered coffee. He took a hesitant sip, his face scrunching as he tasted just how bitter the coffee was. He stood, making his way back toward the little coffee station. Ripping open two packs of sugar, Cas made sure to dissolve them completely before returning to the bed he had been sitting on.

"I guess we have to stay here, don't we? Until the Winchesters show up?" Castiel asked after finishing off the better part of his coffee. He raised an eyebrow, tilting his head to the side as he eyed her. "You know, I will be fine. You aren't required to stay."

For some strange reason, to Kinsley it seemed as though Cas didn’t want her there. Sometimes it was hard for the youngest Winchester to decipher the angel’s intentions. She had spent far less time with the man than her brothers had. Her eyebrows pinched together as she tried to piece a respond in her head. She licked at her bottom lip, setting the nearly empty cup of coffee on the nightstand next to her. She lifted her legs so that she was sitting Indian style on the bed.

“Do you not want me here?” she whispered quietly, not looking at him. She decided to meet his gaze, giving him a small smile. “I was kinda enjoying spending time with you. The boys always hog up all the angel time.”

Castiel's head shot up so that he could look over to Kinsley, a small frown settling on his features as he shook his head slowly. His eyebrows pulled together as he tilted his head to the side, eyeing her. He was trying to figure out what Kinsley wanted but then, he wasn't so sure it wasn't what he wanted and he certainly couldn't just give into his own desires. That was against everything that he had ever been taught.

"I just don't want you feeling as if you have to be here," Cas explained after a moment of consideration. He gave a nod of his head, straightening a bit, only for the confusion to set back in at her next comment. "What do you mean?"

Kinsley face flushed slightly as Castiel questioned her. She wasn’t about to delve into the real reasoning why she liked being around Cas—she knew the feelings probably wouldn’t be reciprocated anyway. She ran a hand through her hair, trying to come up with some good excuse to tell him. She cleared her throat before she spoke, “I enjoy your company…” She mumbled, looking away from him. “The boys always want you around and I always get left out so.” The boys don’t want me around you so I don’t say something stupid or distract you… She thought to herself.

Kinsley gave Cas another awkward, yet shy smile. She scrunched her nose playfully at him, “Is that okay?”

Castiel hesitated, mulling over her words in his mind. He couldn't quite figure out what was wrong with the way she spoke, there was something that he detected that told him she was lying. Or maybe she was just not telling him the entire truth. But it was far too much effort at the time, with how weak he still was. He needed to conserve his energy as much as possible and not waste it on such useless things.

"The boys only ever want me around if they need something. They wouldn't want you there in case you got injured," Castiel tried to reason. It didn't really bother him that the boys were using him for their own gains because he had the same end goal as they did. "It's only because they care about you."

Kinsley reached over to the night stand once more, grabbing the remote for the small TV that sat across from them. With the press of the button, the light from the TV illuminated the room. “I’m not a child anymore though,” Kinsley huffed. “They act like I am a damn toddler. I’m not a toddler anymore. I grew up the same way they did.”

Kinsley looked over towards the TV, flipping through the channels until she settled on a movie. “And God forbid at twenty-four years old I have a boyfriend. That shit would not fly at all,” She grumbled as she rolled her eyes.

Castiel couldn't help the little grin that came to his lips at the mention of Kinsley dating. There had been a fair few times that he had witnessed the brothers freak out because they had thought Kinsley was either in danger or was actively being hurt. "Perhaps you just need to find a boy that they can trust? It is a dangerous life,' Castiel commented with a shrug of his shoulders.

He glanced over to her, offering a lopsided grin. "You haven't been around when they panic about your safety. What they do is only because they care about you."

“Who would you suggest, Cas?” She mumbled quietly. She looked over at the angel, who was looking right back at her—innocence washing his features. She couldn’t help but smile at him. The man really had no clue, did he? “I don’t think that those two would trust anyone besides—well no one, really.”

Kinsley let out a small laugh, turning her attention back towards the television in an effort to conceal the small flush that was creeping up her neck. “Besides, there’s really no one who I think would want to try and live our lives. Kinda a deal breaker, in my opinion.”

Castiel's eyes narrowed a bit as he eyed Kinsley, not quite understanding what she was trying to hint at. All he noticed was the flush that her skin was taking and suddenly, concern was washing over him. Cas pushed off of the bed and made his way over to the bed that she was sitting on.

"Are you feeling okay? You look quite warm," Castiel commented, sitting on the edge of the bed. He leaned a bit closer than what would have been comfortable, his eyes trained on her. "Do you need a doctor?"

Kinsley’s breathing hitched as Castiel came closer to her. For a moment, she thought she had stopped breathing all together. She clamped down on the inside of her cheek as he examined her. Kinsley reached out, gripping his shoulder for a moment. Mostly just to feel his muscle beneath her hand, but also to push him back slightly.

“I’m okay, Cas.” She breathed with a small laugh. “I’m okay, I promise.”

For the slightest of seconds, she light her eyes drift down towards his lips which were parted slightly as he stared. “Cas, I’m fine.” She laughed once more.

Castiel's eyes narrowed a bit as he leaned forward despite Kinsley's urging for him again. He tilted her head to the side as if it would help him be able to decipher the words sh wasn't saying, better. "Something is troubling you," Castiel reiterated with a huff.

He leaned away from her, shaking his head slowly. "Just because I'm in a weakened state doesn't mean I can't feel your emotions, Kinsley," Castiel said, fighting the urge to roll his eyes. He scoffed as he moved back to sit on the opposite bed again. "Even if I can't pick out the individual ones, they are still quite present."

Kinsley couldn’t help but let out a soft giggle at the angel’s attitude. Castiel was always pretty sassy, but in the state he was in now, it was even more amplified. She looked over towards him, a smile still plastered on her face as she watched him silently brood.

“Cas, everything is fine,” she promised as she shifted herself to get off the bed. She walked over and sat down beside him. “Chill out Mr. Sass, okay?”

Kinsley reached out and ran a hand through his hair, smiling. “Wanna go grab some food or something? I’m sure you have got to be hungry by now, yeah?”

Castiel's brows pulled together as he looked over to Kinsley. "Should we really leave? What if the Winchesters show up and we're not here? They'll be worried," he tried to reason, a frown forming on his features. What if they left and that was the wrong thing to do? As much as he thought he was valuable to the twins, he knew that they actually cared about Kinsley's well being. He couldn't just endanger her...

Clearing his throat, Castiel pushed to his feet and made his way over to where his shoes sat by the door. "We can always grab some food and bring it back to the room, right? Like, that's okay?"

Kinsley frowned at Castiel. “Cas, do you not trust me?” She really didn’t want to have another one of the men in her life to believe that she was inferior. She had spent a lot of time growing up trying to prove herself to her brothers that she was just as adequate of a hunter as they were.

Kinsley slumped back onto the bed as she allowed her thoughts to consume herself. “I mean, we can always order in if you want. We can have something delivered… We don’t have to go out to get anything if you don’t feel comfortable with it.”

Kinsley looked over at him, giving him a weak smile. “Pizza?”

Turning around to face Kinsley, a frown formed on Castiel's face as he shuffled back over to her. He lowered himself into a sitting position beside her, turning so that he was facing her more than anything. "No. That's not... that's not what I'm trying to say, Kinsley. I don't understand."

He cleared his throat and looked away, trying to ignore the need to ease Kinsley's discomfort. She was clearly upset and he felt an unnatural desire to help her feel better. But hwo? He had not a clue.

"I just meant that it's probably best because we don't want to alarm your brothers. You know how they can be."

Kinsley tied her blonde hair up, a small sigh escaping from her lips. She sure as hell did know how her brothers could be. Maybe Castiel was right, maybe they should just hang out at the hotel from the time being. She reached over and grabbed the hotel’s land line. She grabbed the phone book, looking up the closest place that would deliver. She called them in an order and paid for it over the phone.

“Alright I ordered us a pizza and I think I have beer in the fridge.” She mentioned quietly as she stood up to go to the small mini fridge. “Do you want one?”