"Coming Out" to Family About Sexuality

i came out to my mom awhile ago she was ok with it my dad called me an abominnation (i still havent forgiven him in that) and he is in denial.

I came out today acually. Yeah, mum doesn't believe me, she thinks I'm doing it for attention. She also doesn't believe I have OCD either.

I came out to my parents last year (when I was 15) because I supposed best friend told 2 people behind my back :L obviously I was upset by this so when my mom asked I was just honest and said, "I'm gay" she was fine with it. Later that evening my dad and older brother came in to hug me and say they don't mind and my older older sent me a long text saying it's great! :D

Funny story: I came out to my best friend March 21st, 2011. My last girlfriend was the february before (I was still confused) we only lasted like two weeks but I ended up being a gay... And she ended up being a lesbian! :L:L

I came out as pansexual about a month ago to my grandparents (who I live with), and shockingly they were just like, "Oh, okay." Which really surprised me, they're very Catholic. I've been out to my friends for a few months, which was much easier because almost all of them are bi or gay. It's a little funny, because sometimes my grandparents forget. I tried dropping hints to them for years, but they never picked up on it.

I'm really grateful my coming out was a positive experience.

I have absolutely no idea how to come out to my parents. I just don't even know where to start. I don't know what they'll think or how they'll react or anything.

My mother has had suspicions about me since I was thirteen, but never really brought it up or mentioned it in direct relation to me, but made it very clear whenever there were gay people on TV, or I mentioned that I had gay friends, that she really didn't approve. I eventually came out a few months back now as pretty-much-gay-but-asexual-but-something-or-other, I don't really know my sexuality to be honest, I just know I'm far more romantically interested in girls than I ever have been in guys. But yeah, I came out and got kicked out and disowned and she said some pretty damn horrible things. She was never a good mother anyway so I didn't really expect anything different.

I told my dad last month, and while he wishes I was straight, I think for my sake more than anything else, he's accepting and supportive of me.

I came out to my brother Kaylub about 5 years ago and he laughed at how nervous I was. I was and still am so happy he accepted me.
I came out to my father in the summer and it was weird. I had my boyfriend at that time over and we were going to tell him but he ended up walking in on us kissing. He wasn't mad though and that was probably one of the awesomest things my dad has done for me.
My mom didn't care either. She actually likes my boyfriend more then me which sucks but I'm glad she doesn't hate him to.

I was outed a day before my birthday by my mum in McDonalds.
I began crying heaps and I think I said 'I'm gay, ok?' A little too loud...

She told me she loved me but the next day she's like 'it's a phase, you're too young.'
'My friend went through a phase like that in high school.'

One night me and my parents were watching TV and there was a guy who looked like he belonged in a Korean boy band, and I said he had nice hair.
Mum was like 'See! You do like guys!'
Dad was confused. Mum told Dad, and then she mentioned she wanted a gay son not a gay daughter. That still really hurts to this day.

I don't even know if she's okay with it now, she doesn't really say anything about it now. I don't know if Dad's okay with it, he just ignores it.

I came out to my mother and her husband probably about two years ago, I did it when I was 17. I had always been scared of coming out to my mother. She had always told me she wouldn't mind if I was gay as long as I was with someone who treated me right, but I had heard all the stories of things going wrong so I was still a bit scared to tell her about it.

It happened at around 2 am, my mother and her husband had finally gotten home so we were sitting around the kitchen table catching up for a while before going to sleep. Out of the blue, her husband turns to me and asks me straight out if I'm gay. When he asked, I decided to was time to come clean and be honest about it, so I just gave him a whisper of 'yes'. He just nodded his head and went back to the previous discussion. My mother didn't say anything about it. We were only there for a couple minutes longer before she took him into their bedroom to go to sleep. I can remember the fear I felt when she left. She didn't say anything at all. I was scared she was mad or disappointed in me for it. A little bit later, she came back out and hugged me, telling me she was glad that I finally trusted her enough to tell her.

My mother I think overall is simply tolerant of it. She doesn't hate me for it but at the same time, I feel like she still wishes I was straight. While I'd like her to be completely accepting of it, I'm fine with her tolerating it. It hasn't come between us and she doesn't seem mad or disappointed in me. I'm really glad she's at least tolerant of it and that it doesn't bother her.

Her husband on the other hand.... It hasn't bothered him at all and he's completely accepting of it. So accepting in fact that he often engages me in conversations about sexy women when we're watching TV or music videos together. We go on with that until my mother makes us stop because it's gotten "too weird" for her. Haha. I'm really thankful for him. Even though he doesn't realize it, he's helping me become more confident in my sexuality and helping me further accept it.

I don't plan on coming out to the rest of my family. I know that most of my family wouldn't accept it. My grandparents in particular are the ones I'm most scared of. We don't always get along, but I still love them and I would hate to lose them. My grandfather is a big homophobe. My grandmother is a bit softer, but I know she still hates homosexuals as well. To my grandfather, being gay is one of the worst things you can be. It's an unforgivable sin in his eyes. To him, we're not human, we're "things". It breaks my heart. I would love for him to be accepting of it and see no difference in me for my sexuality but deep down, I know he won't. It terrifies me the possibility of what he could or would do if/when he finds out. What anyone in my family is capable of doing if they find out terrifies me.

It's just better kept a secret for right now I guess.

i have a friend that is 'still' in hiding...he wont come out because 'it's wrong' even though he has told me many times that he finds _______ cute...he'll get scared and deny ever saying it. the sad part is, is that if he would come out to one or two people we could help him with his problems instead of him hiding and i wish so bad that i could help him!!! and i know that i cant 'make' him come out but he already told me he likes guys and then said he doesnt and then said he does...so anyone with any idea on how i can help him become more comfy in his own skin??? and no im not gay

Rae-Dene:

i have a friend that is 'still' in hiding...he wont come out because 'it's wrong' even though he has told me many times that he finds _______ cute...he'll get scared and deny ever saying it. the sad part is, is that if he would come out to one or two people we could help him with his problems instead of him hiding and i wish so bad that i could help him!!! and i know that i cant 'make' him come out but he already told me he likes guys and then said he doesnt and then said he does...so anyone with any idea on how i can help him become more comfy in his own skin??? and no im not gay

Just don't bug him about it? It can take a long while to figure out your (gay) feelings and 'coming out' is a major (and usually pretty scary) decision to take, feeling extra pressure from your friends to rush into it isn't very helpful. Be grateful that your friend trusted you enough to share with you such sensitive information and let them know you support all their choices, are proud of them, won't judge them, are there for moral support if they need it, etc. It might be helpful to check out PFLAG and become more active in local LGBT / allies orgs like GSA (if you're still in high school?). Ultimately, the most effective thing you can do to make queer people feel more comfortable with themselves is help fight homophobia, since that's the main reason behind the uncomfortableness in the first place.

@ Rae-Dene
Let him know your opinion of him doesn't change no matter what. My friend had a friend like this who would sleep with guys and pretend he was straight the next day. With the world we live in, it can be easier to hide because of all the people giving you shit and thinking you're a bad person for no reason. Until they feel safe, they won't come out.

Also, I know you didn't mean anything by it but adding "no, i'm not gay" at the end is sort of offensive. It implies that none of us are mature enough to know gay and straight people can be friends. It also implies the only reason someone would have a gay friend is sexual attraction. It's not a necessary sentence to add.

@ dru saves the songs
I'm sorry if I offended you...but there are some people out there that wouldn't see it like that but I don't want someone to get the wrong idea

@ Rae-Dene
I guess the question is, so what if someone gets the wrong idea? Being gay isn't an insult. Just correct them and move on.

@ dru saves the songs
You are taking this in a totally wrong way...it's not like I care but I hate when wires are crossed and everyone gets defensive...like now!!! Take a chill pill dude

@ Rae-Dene
I'm being quite calm. You are the one using an abundance of exclamation points and telling me to chill out. I'm telling you what was implied by your statement and why I was offended by it. I apologize that you don't want to hear my opinion of why I found your statement offensive. I wanted to let you know because I was sure it was unintentional and you wouldn't want to offend anyone on purpose. Now I'm aware you don't care if you offend anyone and will not make that mistake in the future. My apologies.

@ dru saves the songs
Actually I would never offend someone on purpus...but when someone tells me I'm wrong and they don't know how to give constructive criticism I don't like it...because just think of all the other people out there that is taking your "advice" and getting offended them selfs

@ Rae-Dene
I thought you would want to know it offended me. Now I have no idea what you want. I tried to be polite. I'm out. Bye.

And I said I was sorry it offended you I never ment it to

I'm bi but my mom thinks I'm straight. I've had a couple of boyfriends but I've kept my relationships with females a secret. I don't think she would like that. Whenever she hears of lesbians she cringes, so... yeah.