Cherry Soda Boy - Comments

I like the other one better .... but, its still good nontheless

Oh my, this was a really really good start. It really drew me in. It’s…I don’t know how to describe it. It just grabs you. I enjoyed reading it. The way it was written and the ideas that are revealed are just…gripping. It looks like it’ll be a very interesting story.

The word “self-centerness” confused me a bit. I mean, I get what you’re saying, but I don’t think it’s a very good word.

There’s a few typos and there was one place that was a bit sketchy, but other than that I was peachy.

I never got around to reading the orginal version of this, but so far I love this new version.

I'm intrugued about Robin's character which is good because you've got me interested so I'll be subscribing now.

I love your style, and you're an excellent describer. I especially loved the first couple of paragraphs.

oh so his name is robin huh? hope its as good as the one at fanfiction!! maybe better? i really LOVE the series! or story or w/e butits totally AWESOME!!

I really like this!
It wasn't like i expected at all, update soon please ^_^

I remember reading this ages ago, and loving it. I'm sure I'll love the new version as well. It'll be intresting to see the changes.
I love the first chapter. You really get a feel for Robin's character.

hey you put it up again, will feed back after i read but yay :)

I loved the old version of "cherry soda boy", so I really hope you continue with it.
I loved the rewrite of the first chapter so far. It had more emotion.

Ah ha, it's baaaaack!
I love this story so much.
I was all :cheese: when I realised you hadn't updated anything in a while, wandered onto your page and found everything gone.
And just by chance I decided to check your page once more today, to see if you'd done anything, and there it is. It made me happy.
And I shall go read it now.

I love how cynical Robin seems, his little observations and conclusions he must have spent a while mulling over in his mind to seem so bitter about them. Though his tone seems to soften as he mentions the boy with the cherry coloured hair.

And it's amazing how well your writing fits with it, how well your words flow through Robin to create his character. It's not simple, but it's not too complicated, it's very him. Or how I remember him from the last time I read this.

I'm really looking forward to the re-write and to see what's been changed. I loved the story last time and feel this is going to be better.

And this comment is lame because I always fail at commenting first chapters / introductions. Sorry... :XD

I can review by chapter now. :lmfao
Seriously, I'm glad this story is coming back.

It differs quite a bit from the original opening (as far as I remember, but correct me if I'm wrong?) I like it. I like the social commentary you've got there. I like that Robin is opionated. It's interesting. Maybe I'm looking in the wrong place, but I haven't really come across many stories on here that have refercences to politics.

Robin is an interesting character; he comes across as intelligent, cynical and observant, but also...lost, I think. He feels as though he should have done something, but didn't think his voice was loud enough. It seems like a hopeless situation, one that was inevitably going to happen.

Your writing flows with a kind of elegance. All the sentences fit together nicely. And your word choice is great; not simple but not too elaborate either. And "arrogance and ignorance" fits together so well.

Looking forward to more.

I will be reviewing this as I read.

Story/Review Game.

Interesting story title – completely makes me curious on what this is about :cute:. Hm, interesting summary – completely makes me want to read :tehe:. So I will be starting on chapter one now.

Now as I notice the full paragraphs – definitely supplies plenty of useful information. The length of the introduction is a ‘eh’ for me, but it’s an introduction – so I understand why it is so short :cute:.

I really liked how you opened up the introduction, made me keep reading. I had to say that :cute:. Now I want to point out when you use dashes, I am sure you have to space them on both sides before inserting a dash. Example:

Us into mindless droids- Don’t do that, do this: Us into mindless droids – I kind of to point that out. I don’t major in writing or anything, but I think believe that’s how it supposed to be on here. Unless you’re professional, then there are no spaces, just humongous dashes :tehe:. So far, that is the only thing I find negative about the introduction so far.

I must say the opening paragraph almost sounded like a professor or a scientist talking :tehe: excellent :cute:. What I really liked about it, was how you compared everything to everything in some sort of way – I just kept reading :cute:. It made absolute sense to me.

He’s a democrat! Totally awesome! No one on Mibba used a political thing yet – so this is a first for my eyes.

However for me, Robin Martyr, I would have rather live in the deepest part of hell, than had spent my life surrounded by the fascist, close-minded people, I was forced to call my neighbors.

That sentence alone reminded me of Dante Stone from The Tenth Circle. But that’s okay – because I didn’t see it throughout the introduction :cute:.

Now I have concluded the introduction. WOW! I am touched and simply impressed by you’re writing skills. Very good use of vocabulary – you had a tongue splutter there towards the end, but I managed to slow myself down and understand “arrogance and ignorance” :cute: so thank you for writing this. And re-writing this? Wish I read the original.

Now all I want to do is read his journey :cute:. Keep job writing this :tehe: I applaud you.

This is amazingly well written
I absolutely love it.
Can't wait to read on

I love it....
Please continue....