Can I just say how much excited I was when I saw you updated? Because I was. Very much. I like Pete's character. Reminds me of Grumpy or Grouchy Smurf for some reason. Poor Brendon is desperate, I just want to kiss him to make it better. And William... Oh dear, I can't even describe how much I love his character. The only thing I might not liked is the fact that the sentences are kind of protracted, if you understand. Not in a wrong way, just like: She felt as though she couldn’t speak, and so she didn’t, but she soon regretted her choice when she felt William’s hand move to touch her neck, and by it, he pulled her off the ground as she struggled for air, as he suspended her above the moldy stone. It's okay, actually, but it just seems to me that you could make it into maybe two sentences. But I loved it. I like the intense suspense through entire chapter
You're welcome:). It's an amazing story, so I'm glad I can be a beta reader ^^. And sorry for my English... sometimes it can be a little confusing and hard to understand;p
Hey you guys. I just wanted thank you guys for all the comments. I really, really appreciate them. :D I also wasn't sure if all of you read my author's notes, so I wanted to post a semi-important link to a journal I wrote for you guys. Check it out!
Nooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!! What happened? I need to know. You can't just leave it like that. Okay, now that that's out, onto the commenting. I like the conversation and the bickering between Brendon and Pete. Especially when he called him 'Peter'. And Pete haven't drink blood since the'60's? Makes you think how old exactly he is, and how long does this war is going on. I really liked it, and you need to update frequently, because I'm holding onto this story 'till the end.