Heartbeat - Comments

Honestly, I feel horrible. But it's not that bad kind of horrible, from my perspective it's good because it means that you've (once again) placed emotions into my heart through a story and I just can get them the fuck out. It's worse than it has been before, and I don't know why. The story literally sucks my life out as I read it and it makes me want to double over and cry, but I. can't. cry. I really want to cry, more than anything, but it makes me so depressive I can't. I try to uplift myself with a smile, but it vainly feels like a weight pressing to my face, an unholy mixture being devised. And you did that. You smudged your world into me and completely gave me the message. It's insane but it's completely amazing, all the same.

I can’t even look at him without thinking that the fury in his eyes is going to sink through my skin so much that it will just rip my flesh right off. I tear my eyes away from him and find the door handle and grab my bag, with the last thing I see before I‘m sprinting towards my house, being his arm wrenching out towards me to grab me or rip my whole arm off or rip something else and I’m just running until my legs feel like cold jell-o and when I reach my house and get inside, I lock the door like there’s a robber about to break in. I find the door to our backyard and click the lock on that as well, alongside the door to the deck and the porch and the bathroom door, too, after I belt up to it where I can throw my head into the toilet bowl and finally empty the contents of my stomach so hard that it stings my throat when I’m finally finished with fear of him suddenly bursting through the door, ready to kill, still running through my veins, even colder than the blood itself.

That was a very long part to quote, and is taking up space, but I had to put that in here. If my comment needs anything, it's a perfect discussion about that, and saying things worth the weight of a meaning. I was actually pretty shocked when it got through my head, the act Frank had just commited, the ice in his veins, now almost accidental flowing throughout his blood stream. It wasn't expected- I never saw that coming. At all. I don't think it was the right step to take, and I feel terrible for saying this, but I'm glad he did something, I'm glad he did that. Gerard deserved it. He really did. I'd have liked Frank to just let somebody know what was going on, and I doubt his parents would say what he thinked they would.

He doesn't have to be in a mental hospital. He just needs to find a little help to free him from Gerard, who is close to a monster. He needs somebody to brighten up his days and make him full of energy and not a bruises, somebody worth living for. The opposite of a Gerard. The opposite of the "cool" kid walking down the hall of a cheerleader chanting a cheer or that friend who used you in the first grade. No. He deserves an amazing person who'll make him truly happy.

That's all.

As always, so fucking amazing.
Man, I suck at leaving comments, but that was just ... incredible.
Update soon, please ^___^

My God. That chapter was fucking amazing; the power literally kept me glued to the screen - and when Frank hit Gerard... I'm really scared now.
The way you show a really dramatic scene without periods or commas and just keep going without punctuation throughout the whole paragraph is just amazing. It shows how fast it's going and how he drifts from his mind to the real world.

Brilliant.

please your probaly sick of it but this story is soo good, i really wish you'd update this is offically my favourite story, i id love it if you would update please

One of these days I promise you that I'm going to break out crying in the middle of reading this, and loose about half on my insides, damaging my sight from the tears that scrape against my eyes, hardly being able to move from the impact of my trembling, not able to pick up from where I had left off for a long time- but still, I will carry on.

I've decided that I'm going to smile much more, but for Frank. Because he really needs to get something that'll make him actually smile. I wonder how you do this, though. That psychiatric institute idea was amazing, I never expected to see him get on a bus, let alone sneak up there and feel like he's at home.

How is it possible for one to have such talent?

I haven't commented this in awhile,
but... jesus, it's so amazing.
It feels like I'm reading something from Barnes and Noble. It seriously does.
I get all happy when I open my mail and see this was updated.
More soon, please ^___^ <3

Aww I really feel for Frank, I really do. : (
It's just so sad that someone would have to go to a mental hospital in order to get some effing rest.

I wish he would talk to Gerard. Make it happen. lol.

<3

Alrighty, my computer’s fixed.

I’ve always wondered how you can write a (sexually) abusive scene without any dialogue. Though, I’m glad you didn’t or else it’d take me right out of the story. You know you’re killing me a little more inside with your writing. It’s weird how someone will be talking to me as I’m checking my e-mail and I have to find some way to get them the fuck out of my room just so I can read your update in peace and quiet.

and I’m not like that with any other story.

I'm going to write this as best and as fast I can, so sorry if it turns out bad, but I've had this HUGE headache for the past month, and now my whole brain feels numb and frozen, so I'm in a lot of pain with just trying to comment. But, I'll do this for you, and only because I care so much for this story. Feel Pound and everything.

Like one of the first chapters did, this chapter had me so transfixed in the reading that I didn't realize there were burning tears rolling down the edge of my jawline until I had finished it. It's killing me, what Frank is going through because of one ass hole that can't keep his hands to himself and fair for once. Again, the basically rape scene was making me feel extra bad again, and I just felt like pulling Frank away and helping him get to somewhere safe.

Don't go to school...

I don't think I've ever commented on this story before, but wow!
How on earth is it possible that this is out there, yet not so muchly commented on?

Seriously, this is one of the best things I've ever read, you've got a new fan! : )

Ugh it amazes me how this doesn't have more comments or stars!
It is truly amazing and you capture emotion so well!

Sorry I didn't get a second to comment before,but you can blame my homework and stuff for that. But for now, let's get on with my comment before my head turns to ash.

I'm getting really concerned about Frank's abuse problems. I knew it was going to become too much one day, I just knew it. Wether it was that he had to tell the truth, to something as dramatic as him being dead, I didn't know. But something just HAD to happen that made a change in everything. I just never really expected this.

I never thought they'd think it was his parents doing this to him. Like, I know it's almost an instant thought, but it never seemed to cross my mind at all. I really loved the part when Frank was having his day dream about recieving his 'trophy of awesomeness' and stuff. It added a nice ring to the scene, and calmed me down.

Yeah, this is the part where I beg for an update.

My computer had some kind of molest or something yesterday and seriously needs to be repaired , so I don’t have the time to write a satisfactory review as I’d like. BUT,, I did have the time to read this compelling chapter.

It’s amazing how you can hit a person’s emotion-box by three measly words; the ending words of this chapter. I cant help but wonder what kind of turmoil would arise if Frank’s parents ever found out what Gerard is doing to him.

Feels weird not leaving a longer comment on this story (which I love too much for my own good), but I wanted to leave something before they demolish this intolerable, godforsaken computer.

This story is fantastic!
I love the way you describe things and the way you've constructed Frank's character.
It makes my heart break practically every time I read it though.

I almost didn’t want to comment this after reading the last update. That’s how much it affected me, dude, I felt myself fighting back tears. I think it’s safe to say I’ve become infatuated with this story. It’s a shit-load better than any other story on this site. My face is tearstained thanks to you. I feel almost pathetic, crying over something I read on the computer. But wow . . . just insanely phenomenal.

The beginning of this chapter was almost hilarious.

The test tells me what I should consider doing as a career if I ever get out of high school alive.

I would make a great:
A.) Homeless man.
B.) Serial killer.
C.) Manic depressant.
D.) Coroner

Maybe I can be a dead guy if I grow up. :tehe:

Tehe. You’ve done it again.

But on a serious note, the ending was almost too horrid to read. Don’t think I’m lying or overreacting; it was. I kinda got a mental picture of what Gerard was doing to Frank. && it wasn’t pretty. Don’t ever stop updating this story for it’s one of the few I actually enjoy reading on this site.

Wow. Here I go again, acting like a retard, saying wow. But i don't want this to be like a comment. I don't want it be something that says "I luv it, update soon" or "good story" and all of that. I want to stress out how much I love your work, how hardly it presses down on me, how my head is trying to take it all in and that it doesn't matter how crazy I get over it. Because I'm reading the story, and that's all that really matters to me. Cliche' sounding, I know, but It's true; I live by it.

Today i'll do something a little different. I'll put a little humor into my review, this time. So I was showing my cousin, Chloe, what future careers apparently Frank could have, and she told be she'd like to be a homless man in the future, xD which makes no sense. Then I sent her the part about how Frank's peeling away some of his lip and knows he'll have to get stitches or something, and she agreed, that it was somber yet beautiful, germinating into a field of hope, in some twisted form. My words are the truth, your story is shaped perfectly in that way.

Oh no, though. How will Frank hide his bruised eye? I think he should come out and talk to somebody, otherwise ut hair over the bad eyes, or makeup, except I guess makeup would irritate it and no stop the swelling... man, this is bad...

Update soon lover story-writing majesty.

Let me just say, while I came back here, Tainted, that I completely agree with everything you've been saying. I seriously love to go back and read your comments.

=] In all honesty.

I was waiting for a flashback from you. Now that I got one, I’m shaken.

“Hold out your hand,” I heard him say. I did as I was told and held my hand out close to him. I saw a blue silhouette of his hand in the darkness, taking my hand and his other hand coming up and then feeling something being placed into the palm of my hand. I felt whatever it was with my thumb. They felt like pain killers; some type of pill.

I heard him step in, then I felt him. He was close to me, his face especially. He leaned in and whispered something in my ear.

“Take it. It’s good.”

Bastard. It’s all about the drugs, ain’t it?

I felt the bottle in my hand and his fingers come up to my lips again, his hand in my mouth and the second pill on my tongue. I unscrewed the top to the bottle and quickly put it up to my lips, pouring some of whatever it was into my mouth. I smelled it and it smelled nice, like vanilla, I think. It smelled like the vanilla extract my mom used when she baked.

And the liquid hit my tongue and it tasted worse than anything. I almost spit it out, but I felt his hands on my lips again and his fingers were keep my mouth closed. I combined the vanilla with the pills in my mouth and for a minute, nothing tasted worse. But I forced it down my throat and felt the pills skitter down inside of me and at that very moment, I liked it.

Wow. Just. . .wow

Couldn’t believe what I was reading as my eyes examined the words. This may be a fanfic for some, but definitely not for me.

And then his lips were on mine. Wet and more surprising than anything. My eyes went wide. I tasted the bitter flavor of the vanilla extract and something else I couldn’t identify. And then I felt something weird in my mouth and it felt disgusting. It took a couple of seconds to register into my head that it was his tongue. Eely and slimy for the first couple of seconds, and then I felt the surface with the roof of my mouth and it was gravely and rough like sandpaper or unpolished wood. It reminded me of how people always close their eyes when they kiss in movies, and how mine were wide open and so were his. He stared back at me, calm and more relaxed than anything, before I finally thought I was going to asphyxiate on the lack of oxygen and his tongue descending down my throat. And then he stopped. He disconnected from me and I heard that slobbery smacking sound that you hear in movies when the two people pull their lips off of each other after kissing for a long time. It sounded weird, since I was really hearing it in real life, and not on a television screen; weird hearing that for the first time, actually happening to me.

Deeply admired that paragraph for some reason. Look what your writing does to me, man. I’m almost never speechless when it comes to complimenting influential masterpieces, but I still feel like I’m at a loss for words.

I regret not joining the lacrosse team when Mikey offered it to me. They could teach me a lot about fighting back, especially fighting back with sticks. They could teach me how to defend and build strength and I could run for miles.

In MY eyes, that was the perfect way to end such a perfect chapter. ily for it.

Are you read to read my long ass comment or are you getting bored of them yet? Anyways, i'm not going to stop this is a way too good story to not comment. I'd be insane not to comment, for the most part. So here we begin again...

I admit it, at first this chapter confused me a little, but by the end, I knew pefectly what was going on, which adds even MORE elements to the story. Sheese, element of surprise- you're lacking nothing in this story. It's crazy. You're crazy, This story is crazy. It's just so surreal I can't even...

The flashbacks were just as amazing as how the present times came out to be. It explained so much. Why Frank is stuck with Gerard, where it all began, more problems that Frank went through. I dissagree with Frank here, he shouldn't have agreed to get high, even though that's an obvious statement. It shows that pressure and giving in to something can destroy your life. =[ but why does Gerard have to pressure him into it in the first place? Why target Frank? Why?

I can't express it any further. Update soon.

< 333

so like i just read this whole thing
and wow its just beautiful im not to good at comments
but i just love this =]andmikeysohasacrushonfrankdoesnthe?XD
more soon?