Hello My Name Is... - Comments

re-read this story and from the first chapter to your last it's so obvious how much your writing has improved in that time...it is a really well written story and i love reading it.

I loved the ending ,"the boy who lived" brilliant. I could read this for like, ever!

"Sometimes, I feel like all of this is my fault! I shouldn't have messed with you that one day in class. If I hadn't insulted you and bitched to Clay, none of this would have happened! I hate myself so much right now, I really do! I've caused so much pain...."

I like how it is , in a small way, her fault. I like the way the stories interwine. Very good and im on chapter 26 and im still hooked. Poor seth. I like the alice and daveys realtionship. I like it ;)

That was really good, and very heart moving. At one point, I forget one, I was on the verge of tears (that's hard. I don't cry easily THAT easily.)
It was an incredibably amazing story, and it's sad that it ended, but all things have to end eventually.
The Shooting was amazingly written and very in depth, along with the ftermath that followed. I like all of tyour writings (at least the ones I've read so far) and I can say that I'll always be a fan.
Again, I love it. Amazing.
Thank you...

I've just spent like hours reading this all the way though and I loved every second of it. The whole plot is brilliant and I think how you put so much detail into the characters is great.
You're a very talented writer =D

I saw your chat before.
And its true- You are too modest too often.
But Im inclined to sorta agree that something is sorta lacking.
Im not really sure what though.

I did go back and re read all of it. And it seems like maybe its just off balance. Like you spent so much time building up the climax and then the 'tragedy' happens and then the aftermath seems to not be long enough... Like how I was saying at the beginning that you had longer paragraphs about some people. Its kinda like that.
Like the downhill wasnt long enough. cause in the 10 chaps after the tragedy you have them going down and then up. And I dont know. I think maybe its just not long enough. You had 20 chaps leading up to the tragedy...

I mean I know its not all about quantity but looking at it like that its off balance.

Like you want to character by character. Then I think you slighted William the most in the end.

Like I get how the William/Mars scene was suppose to be like a big intense gesture but it didnt read like that. I dont really know that people grasped the concept of what Mars was actually doing in letting William off like that. I mean gangs and thugs and the 'code of the street' I get it I really do. But I dont know how many other people get it. There was a lot implied in that scene and I think it needed to be more straightforward. Like describe what Mars 'gesture' really meant. He was giving him a chance at life. I mean the whole you are dead to me now, don't make it into something official line was pretty intense.

I mean basically William has no choice in being a thug anymore. I mean he was like booted out. So then him showing up at the dance, like trying to find his place in life now that hes got none and that girl kinda giving him a chance... that was good. Like that was his hope for the future. Like that people can see him for more. I mean he had to have some doubt when he first walked in and got into it with that guy whats his name Alices ex.... Which I dunno would put him back like - that thats all hes good for. Like being the 'muscle'. That like thats all people will see him as. A thug. I mean that guy was scared of him for no other reason then his size and skin color. I mean that was just so fucking I dunno... the whole point of the dance is to show like some 'unity' and non discrimination and you fucking make a scene like that in the hallway. It was great cause it shows like no matter how people say they dont judge they do! and the line you like boys muthafucka? ouch!
I mean that whole scene was just so layered.
But focusing on William, that just reinforced his identity or lack there of identity. So when the girl asked him to dance it was great.
that was his turning point. But you just glazed over him.
I mean wheres his self doubt? wheres his low point? its hidden. Its there. But its hidden.
But I dont know. Im posting this in the story comments and not in an email cause Im hoping that maybe someone will read it and offer their opinions on William too.

gosh...

i absolutley love this story[!]

its so gripping and filled with raw emotions.

i was hanging onto everyword!

Rosh
xx
♥

That's all???

Ohh such a "poetic ending"... Seth and the best phrase ever XD

Seth is an artist

Was soo beautiful congrats!

(i'll miss this)

that was absolutely amazing..
i dont want it to be over though...:'(
xoxo
Molly

IT'S OVER NOW, INNIT?!?!?!?!?
D:
D:
D:
D:

*tears if pain*
*claps*

*Applause*
Amazing Work Here, Enjoyed Every Last Chapter. It Was Brilliant!
Good Luck In What You Write Next =D
<3

No, that's end? Oh, that was one of the best original fics I've ever read on here...no.... =[

But those were some really good chapters and that was a really good story. It was original and I liked it. Maybe if this was editted a little, it could get published. I look forward to reading your future stories and such...but that was a good ending.

Hello, my name is the boy who lived...

=]

So I come back here and I see that I have to read ten more chapters...you update so fast and so much, this will take me awhile...

- Eagerly Starts Reading -

O my... what will happen that night?? what's so important?

And whats up with Seth?? (yo I like Seth XD)

Oh! you keep on XD

now we are years later... no more three moths ago.... this is exiting I want to know what will happen next!

ahh more please.
xoxo
Molly

Man I can't finish writting a comment when you post other chapter XD this is crazy XDD

Ohh Seth tryed to hung his self??? God that's just plain WOW!... I didn't spect that

Continue posting!!

(yeah, yeah bad written words and verbs tenses I know.. don't blame me... I'm still learning english XP)

Alice and Davey were getting hot in past chapters, now, they got hot XD

Sorry about that silly coment, You're updating fast... Fuck james and his "pijo" (is in spanish I couldn't find another way of saying it) way of livving....

man you are a true master with the updates. i loved the new chapters.

Ohh the balledance XD.. soo sweet! I knew something should be right.. now what happend with Seth??? he was suposse to be at the balldance!!!

Hehehe, davey and Alice getting hot XDDD that was funny (don't ak me why :P)

BTW never, ever (unless you want to cry you self out) read the "tragedy" chapters listening Angels Are Calling by Ari Koivunen. I think is the song that shows the best the emotions of those chapters... recommended (to listen, not to read and listen at the same time XD you're gonna cry)