How to Save a Life - Comments

Great update. I love this. I was expecting the car to be Zane's step-father and all but its still great. I can't wait to read more. Update soon!

Her getting shot was not something I expected, but besides my surprise I am very pleased that I chose to read this story. Update soon.

I loved the update, simply heartbreaking but beautiful at the same time.

Heartbreaking with the dream, I've done that with a character of mine in my series and made her go insane from her dreams, but beautiful afterwards when he's calming her. I thought that was just adorable. :)

I also loved the fairy tale reference, well, with the princess and the evil wizard. Reminded me a lot of the "Grimm Fairy Tales", and an episode of Criminal Minds I watched the other night. The Criminal Minds episode ended on a very sad note, but the princess part reminded me of it.

I also wanted to add in the last comment, but didn't because I just forgot to, that this reminds me the more darker obsessional love, well, in the earlier chapters. I got that phrase off of a copy of "The Phantom of the Opera", and I thought it fit nicely here. Just wanted to pass that along.

Anyway, loved the update! :)

~Lady

1. Totally subscribing.

2. In a slight way, this story kinda reminds me of Beauty and the Beast. (:

3. I am in love with this story. <3

4. Keep up the great work! ;D

So I randomly stumbled across this story (for a second time actually, I looked at it before, but for some reason I didn't bother to actually read it), and I must say that this instantly swept me off of my feet.

I don't know if it's the fact that it's a kidnapping love story, or if it's kind of like a psychological thriller, but I really like this. It's a dark romance, well, taking the reader to the darker side of love, and I must say that you craft it well.

It also reminds me of another story that I've read on this site, the former one being more gruesome though, but this one doesn't need it. It's gruesome in it's own way, with the abusive side of Zane, and the fright he strikes into Emily, still, after she admitted to herself that she does in fact love him. It's interesting, how the brain and heart work in a situation like this, and you've crafted it very well.

I'm simply fascinated with this story, and what will happen to the two of them over the course of the rest of this story. You've definitely earned another subscriber. :)

~Lady

For the song on Chapter 28(I think) I kind of thought of Can't Fight The Moonlight by Leanne Rhimes

I read this in two days. I was looking for a good book and I found one. I'm glad that I chose this one :)

This is very well-written. I just picked a random story, and I'm glad I picked this one; I really like it. But you asked me to look for typos, and I did, so please don't shoot me...

"This old rickty shak of a house was far from creepy."
I love the first sentence. It really drew me in and made me want to read more, however, you may want to check the spelling of the words in bold. You forgot the "e" in rickety, and the "c" in shack. This can happen a lot if an author types fast, and is easily missed.

"He use to come about once every two weeks."
Did you mean 'used?'

"This roon was small because he thought it’d be easier to heat in the winter."
Another easily-missed typo; the "n" and the "m" are very close on a keyboard.

"…reach my small bathroom, that contained…"
I’ve made this mistake millions of times; it's hard to tell whether to write "that" or "which". Replace "that" with (you guessed it) "which".

"But it’s better then being dead …"
Replace the "e" with an "a". The word, "then" is used to indicate a specific time, such as "…back then…" or "And then, a giant pink dog attacked!" But the word, "than" is used for comparison, such as "But it’s better than being dead." You may have noticed that I use way too much BB-code.

"…Rotting[,] really…"
This sentence is typically considered a fragment; an incomplete sentence. I usually ignore fragments, as I have seen many fragmental sentences in published works.
That being said, this sentence is fine as a fragment. But that is not why I brought it up.
You need a comma after rotting.

"My case lasted just about three weeks, [and] then they gave up."
Add the "and." You were right with the "then", though.

"… who took me use to boast about it …"
Again, did you mean to say, "used"? (Sorry if I’m getting a little mixed up with the parenthesis and the BB-code)
" Other then that, he…"
Take out the "e" and add an "a" again.

"…took me away well I was asleep …"
Sometimes "well" is mixed up with "while".

"…days of their none stop…"
Instead of "none stop", did you mean "non-stop"?

"He’ll be back soon, he’ll know…"
You added the comma to link the sentences, but I think that a semicolon [;] would be better in this sentence.

"I wasto scared…"
This is one of the most common errors that I’ve seen; the dreaded homophone. A homophone (not to be confused with a homonym) is a word that is pronounced the same way as one or more other words, but has a completely different meaning. Homophones are like, "hare" and "hair." A "hare" is like a rabbit, but, obviously, "hair" is not. This goes for the words, "to", "too", and "two". (Sorry if I’m getting the parenthesis and punctuations wrong-again.) The word, "to", means "near", "towards", or "in the direction" and the word, "two", is, of course, a number. But the word, "too", can either mean "also" or "overmuch."
Do you see my point? You got "to" and "too" mixed up.

"He was back.He’d…"
These two sentences need a space between them: "He was back. He’d…"

"I heard him gasp. My name. "
These sentences could easily be combined; you don’t need that period. Maybe like this: "I heard him gasp my name. "

"I knew he’d be angry.Or maybe…"
Again, you need a space between these sentences: "I knew he’d be angry. Or maybe…"

"His foot steps were automatically…"
Don’t worry, "footsteps" is a word. You don’t need a space there.

"‘It [’] s okay, I’m not going to hurt you…"
Consider adding that apostrophe; "it’s" means "it is."

"I didn’t leave [be]cause…"
"Cause" is a word, however, I mean "cause" as in "cause and effect." I think you meant it as in "because." I know what you meant, though; you could also try: "I didn’t leave ‘cause…"
Apostrophe’s are your friend…sometimes.

"It wouldn't be possable if they …"
This is a spelling error that most people miss; after you pronounce an "a", not an "i". you might want to correct that.

"…killing you, I’d make you’re life a living hell."
Oh, those darn homophones again. You used "you’re", which is a contraption for "you are". Did you mean to use the word, "your", which indicates ownership; she owns her life.

I told you that I could be annoying. Again, please don’t shoot me. I actually really enjoy the story, although I haven’t actually "looked through" the rest of the story, and by that I mean I was just reading, not looking for errors. I might something for other chapters later.

You don’t have to follow my advice; I was only offering suggestions, since you asked me to look through a story for errors, and I did. P.S- I like the first chapter’s theme song. :D

OH WOW THIS SUCKED ME IN!
I usually find something to point out to the author, but I honestly can't find anything wrong with this one. Love it!

Way too many grammatical errors. It's distracting and irritating. Please fix this.

The plot is alright, and character development seems pretty smooth. I like it. :)

I like how she didn't give in to him right away keep up the great work!!!!!!!

I love it. Subscribed. I couldn't stop reading!

I think describing the house, truck and room in the story would be a lot better than adding links. As far as I have been told, links weren't allowed in the story content.

The man who took me use to boast about it all the time. Getting annoyed when I cried about it.

That sentence would look/sound much better like this:

The man who took me use to boast about it all the time and became annoyed when I cried about it.

Also, "possable" should be "possible". Editting your work, would get rid of various mistakes shown in this chapter.

I really do love the concept and can't wait to read more, so I'm subbing and reading more later. I love the storyline :D

i haven't been on in a while . glad to come back and see updates wooo!
girl girl. i just loove the way you write . i do i do.
going to key west for the weekend!
CAN'T WAIT TO READ THIS UPDATED STORY WHEN I GET THERE . OOOH
four hour car ride. uguhugh .
still. i love teeh storiiee!
perfect perfect .
peace + much love, emma!! :B

It......ended:(

<3

hehehe . steamy . even though it was cold outside .

i love love love this story! (: please keep writting it.

I love it!!! :D <3 Write Write Write Write Write!!! <33333 :)
It's just perfect and has me wanting moreeee :)))))

I was half right. lol