I Know You've Got Your Life In Place But I've Yet To Take The Hint

I was super nervous as I walked into Alex’s hospital room. My heart was about to fall out of my chest and my legs felt like sticks that were about to break. I walked into the room without thinking to knock first, and Alex was sitting there on the bed, along with his parents.

I almost turned to leave, but Isobel reached her arms out towards me.

“Come here, Jack,” she said. As usual, I couldn’t disobey her if I tried. Even when we were kids she had the most unnatural hold over me. Nothing sexual or anything like that, but I loved and respected her. I remember once, I wasn’t listening to something that my mom said, and she threatened to call Mrs.Gaskarth on me, and BAM! Whatever it was that I was doing, it stopped.

So I went into her arms without hesitation and she hugged me tight. She whispered in my ear, low enough so that whatever was said stayed between me and her.

“Silly child. Silly children. You and Alex both! How could you hide something like this from us? You know we always, always support you. Always. I love you idiots, even though I don’t know why.”

She let me go then, and Alex’s father stepped over to me. He held out his hand, and when I grasped it firmly with mine, he pulled me into a hug as well.

“We’re going to give you the family you never had, Jack,” he said, and my eyes watered.

“You did that a long time ago, sir,” I said, meeting his eye for the first time in the last six months. “In fact, I can really say you’ve given me everything I’ve ever wanted. With this, my eyes slanted towards Alex and a knowing look popped into Peter’s eye.

“Let’s go, Isobel. We’ll leave the boys some privacy, yes?” Peter grabbed his wife’s hand and walked out the door. As they left, the love between them was more than obvious, and in the very moment, I stopped worrying. I hadn’t had a good role model. I’d had the best role models.

I sat down beside Alex and he instantly pulled me into the third hug I’d received within five minutes. Except, this one was the one I’d been craving all night. I held him with everything I had, feeling his heart quiver beneath his chest and listening to the rise and fall of his chest, sensing more than feeling the warm salty tears that fell onto my shoulder. His shoulders started to shake, and I knew everything from the last couple of months was getting to him. I held him while his world broke, his heart tore, his soul bled, and his emotions drowned. And then I held him while he found his way back to his piece of heaven.

He looked up at me with his big eyes full of liquid. “Jack?” His voice was soft, shy.
“Alex?” I imitated.

His hands caressed the side of my face. “I love you, Jack. Forever.”

Forever. There was no better time than now to do what I had been planning on doing since I walked into the room. No doubt it was weird, no doubt it was crazy, but so were me and Alex. And look at us now. Together, we’re perfect.

My stomach was racing like rollercoaster and my heart was currently in diving practice, but I slid off of the bed nonetheless and faced Alex. My hands were shaking as if I had Parkinson’s disease and I’m not so sure that my face wasn’t shaking, either.

“Alex, I love you more than anything. I’d give you the moon, I’d give you the stars, I’d burn to pieces getting you the sun if that’s what your heart desired. I’d find a way to walk on water, I’d find a way to bring the dead back to the living, I’d build a rocket to the moon and beyond if it means keeping you around me forever. I live to make you laugh, I live to make you smile, I live to make you want to love me as much as I love you. I’m not perfect. I’m crazy, I’m cheesy, I drink too much and I talk too loud. My parents are never going to accept us. But I’m yours. I’ve belonged to you since the first day the shy kid with a weird accent took me home to meet his – our – parents. And now you’re going to belong to me.”

I could see Alex was about to say something, so I held out a hand to stop him. “Let me do this, Alex, before I piss my fucking pants.”

His look of amusement turned to one of total confusion as I pulled my iPod out of my pocket and started to scroll through the songs.

“Jack, what the –“

I shushed him impatiently. Damn it, where was the song? I knew I should have put it in a playlist.

Alex tried again. “Jack, you’re-“

I glared at him this time. And found the song. Taking a deep breath, I clicked play. A familiar melody, a radio song that I actually liked and respected, started to play. Alex looked like he was about to piss himself, too.

When the words, started, I started with them. As hard as it was, I focused on Alex as I started to softly sing.

It's a beautiful night,
We're looking for something dumb to do.
Hey baby,
I think I wanna marry you.

Alex’s eyes grew really, really wide at this and he suddenly reached for the glass of water at his bedside table.

Is it the look in your eyes,
Or is it this dancing juice?
Who cares baby,
I think I wanna marry you.

Well I know this little chapel on the boulevard we can go,
No one will know,
Come on boy.
Who cares if we're trashed got a pocket full of cash we can blow,
Shots of patron,
And it's on boy.

I broke out into some random dance moves as I started to sing this. I grabbed a brush from the bedroom and started spinning around with it in my hand.

Don't say no, no, no, no-no;
Just say yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah-yeah;
And we'll go, go, go, go-go.
If you're ready, like I'm ready.

Cause it's a beautiful night,
We're looking for something dumb to do.
Hey baby,
I think I wanna marry you.

Is it the look in your eyes,
Or is it this dancing juice?
Who cares baby,
I think I wanna marry you.

I'll go get a ring let the choir bells sing like oooh,
So whatcha wanna do?
Let's just run boy

If we wake up and you wanna break up that's cool.
No, I won't blame you;
It was fun boy.

Don't say no, no, no, no-no;
Just say yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah-yeah;
And we'll go, go, go, go-go.
If you're ready, like I'm ready.

Cause it's a beautiful night,
We're looking for something dumb to do.
Hey baby,
I think I wanna marry you.

Is it the look in your eyes,
Or is it this dancing juice?
Who cares baby,
I think I wanna marry you.

I had realized that we would probably attract attention but I hadn’t expected most of the hospital to come running into Alex’ s room. It was only during the instrumental of the song that I realized that a bunch of people were crowding the doorway and the immediate hallway outside of Alex’s room. Doctors, nurses, random patients, Alex’s family, the All Time Low crew, all of them stood there while I was singing. Even Lisa stood there, her baby a pink bundle in her arms. I gulped, tense with the addition of twenty odd people, but kept on going.

Just say I do,
Tell me right now baby,
Tell me right now baby.

Cause it's a beautiful night,
We're looking for something dumb to do.
Hey baby,
I think I wanna marry you.

Is it the look in your eyes,
Or is it this dancing juice?
Who cares baby,
I think I wanna marry you.

When the music ended, I dropped onto my knees like I had planned all along. Instead of a ring, I pulled out a chain containing a silver guitar pick engraved with our initials, the year, and dotted with our birthstones. A matching one waited in my pocket.

“Will you marry me, Alex?” I asked, loud enough for everyone around to hear. There were gasps of surprise and pleasure from the crowd. I’m sure Alex’s parents were crying. But I didn’t move. I looked at Alex.

He was smiling at me. A huge smile.

“One condition, Jack.”

There was laughter and a few suggestive comments from the crowd, and Rian called out “conditions already, Lex? Quit while you still can, Jack!”

I rolled my eyes but stayed focused on Alex.

“I want us to adopt Sammie. I want us to be a real family. She needs us, just like I need you and you need me.”

Tears rushed into my eyes. “Yes, Alex, yes yes yes!”
Another smart aleck called out. “Its him who should be saying yes, not you!” This caused catcalls and whistles to take place from the crowd.

Alex looked at me, looked at the crowd, and then dropped to his knees in front of me. “Yes, Jack Bassam Barakat, I will marry you.”

Everyone started cheering then, and Alex and I rushed together in a fierce hug, holding each other tightly. When we pulled away, both of our faces were wet.

The crowd behind us was relentless, chanting “kiss, kiss, kiss.” Finally, we did, our lips meeting. If I didn’t believe in magic before, I did after that moment.

Well-wishers came up to talk to us after. Zack and Rian were the most pleased. They both had tears running down their faces when they gave us their love. Not once did the question of how will this affect the band be asked. We all knew the answer: take it or leave it.

After everyone else had left, Alex’s dad motioned me to the side as he started to walk out the door.

“If I didn’t already know you were perfect for Alex, I would now. That took balls, my boy. I wasn’t sure you’d go through with it. You looked nervous when Isobel and I left.”

I started. “You KNEW?”

“I suspected. And approved. ”

“Even though my method was unorthodox?” I asked with a smile.

“Even then.”

He was smiling full force at me, and I knew without a doubt where Alex got his beautiful smile (and bushy eyebrows). Sammie also had a beautiful smile (without the bushy eyebrows).

Peter moved down the hallway slightly.

And then he stopped, turned, and said one more thing.

“Welcome to the family, Jack.”