Too Far Gone

Calm never seemed to last long in the prison, and the shouting coming from outside was a stark reminder of that. Beth felt like she'd been waiting for minutes for Rick to say something when in reality it only took a few seconds for the commotion outside to interrupt them. She didn't even have time to really process what was going on.

She instinctively took a few steps forward to meet him, carefully but quickly taking Judith in her own arms. She couldn't help but hesitate, her mouth opening as though she was about to say something to him. There was no time. She had to take Judith to safety before the situation escalated.

Beth always seemed to go in the opposite direction of the fight. Sometimes she wished she could do more to help. She'd been trained, she knew how to handle walkers. When they first took the prison, she helped to clear the fences too... But now she had Judith to worry about. They had enough people outside, but they needed someone inside to protect her. That was exactly what Beth was going to do. She diverted from her path upstairs to stop in her own cell and sheath a knife into her boot. She had faith that the people outside would stop anything getting inside, but she wasn't going to take any chances.

Once she was in a cell upstairs, she carefully lay Judith down on the bed, calming her with gentle 'shushing' noises. Her next step was to secure the cell. None of them had keys to lock the doors, but Beth still pulled the door closed. She tied it shut with a bedsheet. It wasn't person proof, but it would be enough to stop any stray walkers pushing their way into the cell. She could hear Rick yelling outside; it was walkers, not people.

It took time to move the bus, to get it down and block the hole. And all the while more Walkers were pouring through. Clusters that had been further down the fencing were making their way towards the sound of gunfire, following through the downed fence.

Rick had made it to the space between the fences and was torn between urging those there to retreat or fight. If they retreated they'd be safer, but then the walkers would cluster round the gate, and the lock wouldn't hold that much pressure. They'd end up in the main area of the prison and Rick couldn't let that happen. Not with Beth stuck with Judith as she was, not with the home they'd put so much heart into making.

He fired on the walkers, clean shots that downed each one. But their were too many. Rick fell back, only lurching in to plunge his knife into their heads when they got too close. The numbers were overwhelming.

A crossbow bolt suddenly joined the mix, Daryl and the others, better armed than he, had joined the fight and Tyreese had finally gotten the bus outside. Rick span round to shout to the others to fall back when he caught sight of Patrick.

Before he could even question what the boy was doing there it seemed his sudden movement had startled the boy. Last thing he saw was a metal pole hurtling towards his face and he was down.

Beth tied her damp hair back once the cell was secured, resolving herself to comforting Judith. She didn't have time to be scared by the noises going on outside, or even worry about what was happening. The latter was more difficult to process. Rick was out there with everyone else. He was probably the most capable member of their group, but it was still terrifying to know that it was possible not everyone would walk back inside. She just had to have faith that they would.

She sat on the bunk, holding Judith to her chest and letting her head lie against her shoulder. Judith was good at not crying but the noises outside were clearly too much. It was scary, even if Beth didn't want to think about it. The gunfire and shouting filled the silent space in the prison, only matched by Judith's crying. Beth sat silently as she rubbed Judith's back. It was hard to listen out for any signs of danger and she didn't have much confidence that they makeshift close on the cell door would protect them if anyone other than a walker found their way in.

When she heard someone moving through the communal area, she immediately felt on edge. Her first thought was that something had gotten through and she needed to protect Judith. She carefully lay Judith back down on the bunk and stood, removing the knife from her boot as she did. She took a few cautious steps forward, not wanting to be caught off guard if something did suddenly decide to stick it's arm through the cell door. She'd learnt her lesson back at the farm. She stood by the far wall so she had a clear view of anyone coming up the stairs.

The last thing she had been expecting was Daryl and Sasha dragging Rick along the walkway. With a quick turn on her heel, she was back at the bed and moving Judith to the top bunk. It wasn't ideal for a baby, but it was going to have to do. She'd just have to keep an eye on her. She stepped back, hands working quickly to untie the bedsheets before she pulled the cell door open.

Rick furrowed his brow as he came too, immediately regretting the movement as the pain blooming in his skull doubled. With a groan he brought a hand to his head, but stopped short when he felt it weighed down.

He cracked his eyes open. He was inside, in a cell. The familiar wiring of a bunk above him. But his hand...

Rick glanced down, seeing pale hands enveloping his own. He ran his gaze up over delicate wrists that gave way to toned arms. A vest clad shoulder and then Beths concerned face.

It came back in a rush. Seeing Beth, hair damp. The shouting outside then the walkers. Trying to clear them out and then... Patrick? He could remember nothing after Patrick's frantic face.

"Are you alright?" he forced out, voice hoarse and worried. He couldn't hear any sounds but sometimes silence was just as bad. Sometimes silence meant hiding... "What...? Where's Judith? Is she okay? Is anyone hurt?"

Looking after Rick had been easy enough. He was out cold, and with no visible injuries other than what would be one hell of a bruise. She'd checked his arms and neck for any open wounds once Daryl had set him down on the bed. It was just a matter of waiting for him to wake up and keeping an eye on his breathing. Hershel had taught Beth about head injuries when she was helping out in the infirmary. He wasn't bleeding and there were no signs of swelling... Hopefully, it was just a concussion.

It wasn't long after the situation was dealt with that Rick woke up. Beth was watching the sun start to fade outside the window on the walkway when she felt Rick's hand move. Everyone was safe, and they were incredibly lucky not to have lost anyone. She felt guilty for not caring about anyone else. All she cared about was that Rick was starting to wake up.

She turned her attention back to him, her other hand coming up to lightly rest on his forearm. She just wanted him to know that she had been there for him and that he wasn't alone. Once he seemed to be a little bit more aware of what was going on, Beth gave his hand a soft, reassuring squeeze.

"Hey," Beth spoke softly, voice barely above a whisper. No doubt his head would be pounding.

"I'm fine," She smiled. "Everyone's fine... Judith's with Carl."

It was endearing and made her heart flutter to know that Rick's first concern wasn't himself, specifically, it had been her.

"How are you feeling?" She asked, her hand moving from Rick's forearm to brush some hair back from his forehead.

Rick automatically tilted into Beth's touch, relaxing once he'd found everything was fine.

"Tha's good, good. Judith and Carl." He frowned a little. "I'm fine," he said, blinking up at her. "Head hurts a little, that's all."

His mind ticked over slowly as he looked up at Beth. She'd stayed by his side, she'd been holding his hand. He noted through the cotton wool that fogged his mind how Beth looked above him. Almost angelic back lit as she was by the cell lights. Her soft smile and gentle touch.

He bought his hand up, running his fingers along Beths jaw and threading them through her hair. It seemed almost dreamlike, as if he were detached from the world.

"I'm glad you're okay," he murmured.

Rick leaning into her touch let her know it was okay for her to keep going. She kept stroking back his hair, hoping that it would provide some sort of relief from the pain hammering away in his head. Knowing she was doing something to give him comfort kept the smile on her face. They were both okay and together, even if the circumstances were less than ideal. It seemed like it was the first time they had both just stopped. Despite what had just happened, things finally started to settle back to calm.

"I can get you some painkillers," She offered as she grazed her fingers across his hairline. "You're gonna have to take some time off workin', though..."

There was genuine concern in Beth's voice. She didn't want Rick to push himself too far if he did have a concussion. The last thing anyone needed was him out cold again. It was the last thing she wanted to see as well.

None of that seemed to matter when she felt Rick's fingers brush over her skin. She could feel a lump slowly rising in her through and any nerves she had were falling away as Rick's hand slid back into her hair.

"And I'm glad you're okay... You had me worried..." Beth whispered.

"Should be alright," he muttered. "Should save the meds, don't have much..."

Beths hair was soft under his fingers as he stroked through it. Everything about her was so soft, so gentle. He knew what she was more than capable of, knew what she'd been through to get where she now. But she didn't look it. She didn't seem roughened like the rest of them, she was still all smooth and light where he was rough and marred.

"Din't mean to worry you," Rick said, his tongue darted out to wet his lips, hoping it may help his rough voice.

The blue of Beth's eyes seemed so deep, and his own gaze flickered between her eyes and her lips.

She didn't understand how Rick did it. He went through everything without complaining. Even when he felt like he had lost everything, he didn't complain. In his breakdown he was alone, never asking much fo anyone. It was when Beth took on the responsibility of taking care of Beth, but Rick hadn't even asked. She just wanted to help him. She understood the place he was in, maybe they weren't exactly the same, but she knew how it felt to be lost.

He was as a pillar of strength within their group. He was selfless in a different way to her. It was clear he just wanted to help as best he could. She admired him. The way he stuck his hands in and did the dirty work so no one else would have to. Beth didn't doubt she would be dead if Rick hadn't crashed onto the farm with Carl in his arms.

Beth found herself shifting forward without realising, her hand coming to a stop in Rick's hair. She just wanted to thank him, for everything he did for the group, and for her.

Leaning down, Beth pressed her lips to Rick's forehead gently. The soft action lingered a little longer than she anticipated. He needed to know someone cared for him as she did.

Ricks eyes fluttered shut as Beths lips pressed against his forehead, fingers flexing automatically in her hair as she moved.

The contact drew away, and Rick slid his hand round to cup the back of her head.

Without really thinking he leant up towards Beth, using his hand behind her head to gently guide her back closer. It felt like a dream as he pressed his lips to hers, kissing her softly.

Distantly he thought of how he should feel guilty, putting this on Beth. She'd probably jerk out his grip any second now. Slap him. Shout. Storm off. But he couldn't bring himself to stop. After so long with this feeling niggling at the back of his mind it finally felt soothed.

Showing him this sort of affection felt natural for Beth. It was wrong, and she knew it. There was too much going on in the ever shrinking world to be concerned with her feelings for an older man. She'd spent the last couple of days worrying that he would think she was stupid, too young to understand what was really going on. Those thoughts couldn't be further from her mind now.

She didn't know what she was expecting when she pulled away from kissing his forehead, but she willingly moved under his direction. It did feel wrong of her. Maybe Rick didn't know what he was doing. She didn't know how hard he had hit his head. But none of that stopped her.

Beth melted into the kiss, her entire body relaxing under his touch. No part of her wanted to pull away or leave. The only thoughts she had were that of relief and fear that someone would see them. It wasn't because she didn't want anyone to see them, it was that she didn't want anyone to stop them.

Rick kissed Beth for a moment longer, moving his lips against hers and combing gentle fingers through her hair until the toe holding her ponytail stopped him. Eventually, reluctantly, he pulled back, dropping his head back onto the pillow as he looked up at her, expression bordering on astonishment.

"Y' didn't slap me," he got out, hand drifting from her hair to cup her jaw again. "You didn't... was that okay, for you?"

His brow furrowed in concern, worried she'd indulged him with something she didn't want, just because she felt she had to.

"I been, I been thinking about it, for a while," he admitted hoarsely, trying to explain himself. Hoping she wasn't going to run off, tell her father, tell Maggie. Although he'd take whatever the two gave him. "You're just... well, you're just you."

There was something in the kiss that set Beth at ease. She'd only ever kissed one other boy, and that was far from her mind now. The two experiences were barely even akin to one another. Jimmy was a boy, and Rick wasn't. Her first kiss had been awkward and fumbling, but it never felt as right as kissing Rick.

When he pulled away, Beth only just stopped herself from chasing his kiss. His expression was impossible to ignore, and his statement brought confusion to her face. It had never even crossed Beth's mind that she should slap Rick.

"Why would I...?" She trailed off, her hand tracing down from Rick's hair to rest on his cheek. "Rick... I wouldn't have kissed you if I didn't want to..."

It was as simple as that to Beth. She didn't think about any other repercussions that came with it or the way people would respond.

"Is that a bad thing? Me being me?" It was a genuine question, one that Beth had worried about before.

Maybe Rick was starting to realise just exactly who she was in the larger scale of their group. She was one of the youngest, a daughter, and a sister... There was a list of people who could brand Rick something he wasn't for just one kiss.

"No," Rick said earnestly, running his thumb over Beths cheekbone. "No, it's..."

He had to bring his hands back to himself as he pushed himself upright, ignoring the throbbing in his head. He ducked as to not hit the bunk above and he looked at Beth, taking her hand in his.

"It's not a bad thing," he told her. "I've been... well, I thought it was just all in my head. I thought it was just me. I like you, Beth. For who you are, an' what you do. I just... I just don't want you to think I'm trying to take advantage or anything."

As Rick sat up, Beth's immediate response was to tell him that he shouldn't be moving around so much. They still didn't know the extent of his head trauma, but now wasn't really the time to be worrying about it. Instead, she placed a hand on his back, steadying him slightly as he pushed himself up.

Her other hand in his calmed her nerves again. If he thought it was wrong, he probably wouldn't be having such a calm or collected response. He'd probably ask her to leave, or leave her by herself. It was something he clearly wanted to talk through with her, and his hand around hers let her know that it was okay.

"I like you too, Rick..." She confessed, looking down at their hands. "And I like you because you're not the kinda guy who would take advantage... You're one of the good guys."

A relieved smile made its way across Rick's face. He bowed his head over their entwined hands, running his fingers over hers as he looked at them together.

"Well that's... that's a good start," he said, bringing her hand up to press a kiss to her knuckles, almost unable to help himself now he knew that it was okay. That it was something he was allowed to do.

"I need to check on the prison, check on Judith and Carl, see how bad the fence is..." He looked back up at her. "But we can talk when I'm done? If you'd like? We could, I don't know. Figure somethin' out?"

Beth felt giddy as though she was glowing from the happiness that the entire situation was causing. It was the first time since they've arrived at the prison that she had felt such genuine happiness. It was infectious from Rick's smile.

He was right. It was a good start, but to a difficult situation. Was she supposed to tell Maggie and her father? Or would they immediately disapprove? Beth didn't feel like Rick was taking advantage of her, but it didn't mean anyone else would feel the same.

She nodded slowly, bringing her hand up to stroke his face gently.

"Take it easy," She murmured, her thumb stilling on his cheekbone. "I don't wanna find you unconcious again..."

Rick nodded, the soft smile not having left his face.

"I'll find you in a bit," he promised. He leant towards her, faltering for a moment before pressing a quick kiss to her lips.

Rick stood, only releasing Beth's hand when he absolutely had to. He glanced back at her before leaving the cell to find out what happened.

He checked on his children, Carl happy to continue keeping an eye on his sister for a but longer, although Rick suspected that may be because it gave him a chance to read his comics.

Out on the grounds, he surveyed the damage with Daryl. The fence needed to be put back up, the bodies of the walkers cleared. Daryl told him that the council would be discussing it that night, and he nodded along.

The throbbing in his head returned and it must have shown on his face. Daryl stopped his talking and brusquely shooed hom back inside. Rick got a drink, hoping the cool water would ease his headache, before seeking Beth back out.

Rick's brief pause before kissing her didn't go unnoticed. She understood his reservations. This was going to be new for the both of them. Rick had just been mourning, and Beth had only ever had one relationship before. It hadn't even been a serious relationship, and it wasn't plunged into the reality of the new world either.

She brushed her thumb across his cheek as he kissed her, a small, comforting sign to remind him that it was alright. She wasn't going to slap him or push him away. If anything, she wished the kiss would last longer.

As he moved, she gave him a soft smile, her hand squeezing his gently before he let go. She had to admire his dedication and the care he held for everyone in the prison.

Once he left, she neatened up the cell just in case anyone needed to use it. She picked up her knife and slotted it back into her boot before heading back to her own cell. It felt like days had passed since she was last in there, getting her things for a shower. Things changed quickly in the prison when they needed to.

She had to wonder what was going to change between her and Rick, and how it would affect those around them. Undoubtedly, if anyone disapproved they would immediately blame him. He was older and more responsible, the leader of the group. She was willing to stand up for him, though, if it came to it.

Rick sought Beth out, a damp cloth to the lump growing on his head, the closest thing to ice packs they had nowadays.

He half expected the whole thing to have been a concussion induced dream. That he had only imagined kissing Beth. But he doubted he'd ever have been able to imagine the feeling of Beth's lips against his so vividly.

He approached her cell, hearing movement within. He leant against the entrance. Water was trickling down his wrist and face, his head slightly discoloured. He was unshaven and the dirt that seemed ingrained in his skin there as always. He must look a sight, and he had no idea what Beth would see in him.

"You free now?" He asked her.