The Rules of Life - Comments

I really enjoyed reading your story, I love all of your writing. This was amazing, it got me all sorts of emotional. Ha. I couldn't seem to get away from my computer and stop reading. <3

Loved this story, took me a little while to read but was totally worth it. Wasn't expecting that ending, surprised me.

What?!

When's the last time you updated? :(
It seemed so long ago!

Anyways, I really love your story. I've read it over and over again and I spent a whole night reading this.

You accomplished making me fall in love with Travis. You are such a bad person! :( This story was amazing. The plot and the characters and Travis and Mr. H and Paul. You are extraordinary! That was all, k. :D

Yay! The happy end :D this has been great :')

I AM APPALLED! YOU DIDN'T MENTION THE FACT THAT I END UP WITH TRAVIS AND WE HAVE LOTS OF SEX ALL THE TIME EVERYWHERE.

No but really, Travis is so unf. He needs a woman like me. Oh God, I'll stop now.

ANYWAY, I really liked the chunk of chapters I just read. I started with 27 or 28, I think, and read until the end. And I really liked those chapters because so much shit happened but it wasn't overly dramatic, and it was realistic too.

I didn't like her mom at all, and it almost seems like you should have done a little more with that. It seemed kind of weird, just the whole part her mom played, and with Matt and everything. And Matt slept with her mom and ew, and you know buddy, when you love someone, you do go around sleeping with other people, especially their mothers. WHAT THE FUCK. I feel like you should have given that part a little more attention and resolved it a little more, because even in the end I was still thinking about how unsettling it was.

Also I didn't really like how Kinley was yelling at her mom about following her dreams or whatever. Because I thought that was really selfish and hypocritical of her, because she called her mom selfish for following her dreams, but just saying that was really selfish of her. It was like she didn't realize that her mom was a person too, and she sacrificed a lot for Kinley already, and yeah she's her mother and it was wrong of her to just leave like that, but everyone should have the right to follow their dreams.

ALSOOOOOOO, I think Kinley kind of overracted about the laced weed. I mean, yeah, that was a really low thing for Sophia (or whatever her name is, because you randomly started calling her Noelle or something toward the end????) to do, but it's not like Kinley went back to her addiction after it, and you only briefly mentioned the desire she felt for drugs the morning after. So you may want to emphasize that more, the consequential craving and everything. And also it seemed like Kinley was kind of blaming all her problems on everyone but herself, especially the drug thing. It was TRAVIS'S fault that she was at the party in the first place (even though she had agreed to go) and it was TRAVIS'S fault that she'd taken the weed, and it was SOPHIA'S fault for ruining her life. But I was just thinking, honey, this is all you. Because it's her life and she is ultimately the one who has to deal with her decisions. I think she should have accepted more responsibility for that whole situation. But not to the point of complete self-hate because Kinley is stonger than that, I think.

I really liked how she took the fall for Matt. Because they didn't even have sex! So I mean, really nothing happened except for emotional stuff and a few (brilliant) kisses. So she totally saved his ass and I thought that was really great of her.

So yeah, these are just my observations and opinions, and you can totally ignore them if they are of no help to you. Also I just wanted to say that I think you're a really good writer, and it's nice because you look at all the shit on Mibba and it sort of makes me lose hope that nobody knows how to use the English language effectively anymore, especially with the internet nowadays and everything, and it's nice that you actually have talent. So I think you should keep writing and get better and better and one day write New York Times bestsellers and win all sorts of awards for your writing and I will be able to say "I read her stuff before she got famous" and be all hipster and dumb.

I think it's sweet that they ended up together, but I just would feel so weird knowing my boyfriend was with my mom. For example: what about family gatherings? Awkward.

Let me start by saying that I absolutely LOVED this story. Kinley was a great main character, she strong character that had a hilarious and sarcastic view on everything. Your writing in general was also really great. The grammar was very good, and the punctuation and the flow and style were fantastic.

I only have a few recommendations:
1) When Matt is dating Kinley's Mom, there's a gap where I couldn't tell if he had feelings for Kinley or it was just lust. When he said, "I really fell for you," then I could see it. Just for two chapters it seemed like the emotions were one sided.

2) The math prodigy could have been brought out a little more throughout the rest of the story. I think it was cool how she would do math whenever she got stressed and I feel like that disappeared for a little bit.

I adored this and would be happy to read any rewrites or anything you do with it, so let me know if you change anything or need me to expand on any of the above.

Great job!
xxx Bee

Amaazingggggg, amazing amazing amazinggg

Amazing.

Okay.

I really loved thuis story and if u ever write a story witrh travis in it! Tell me, I would loooove that

great story all the way through! lovely ending as well, and it was all really well written, except for a few grammatical errors and some typos, like on the last chapter you say "Door old Dash...." I'm presuming it's supposed to say "poor", or maybe I just missed something in the story.... :D Anyway, you did a great job! LOVE IT!!!!! :D

I realize I forgot the end quote.
so here.

"

have an end quote.

THAT WAS SUCH A BEAUTIFUL ENDING OH MY GOD WHAT EVEN I CANNOT COMPREHEND LIFE
I THINK I'M GONNA CRY
THAT WAS SO FLAWLESS
I love how the end of the end was.
"Where did you go?"
"To my happy place."
"and where would that be?"
"with you."
"with you."
"with you.
"with you.
I LOVE HOW THINGS WORKED OUT.
I love how Kinley DID end up with Matt and I love how she's on good terms with Travis c:
UGH WHY ARE YOU SO PERFECT KELSEY. WHY WHY WHY.
I love you.
see YOU on the flip side! ;D

PERFECT ENDING!!!!!!! :DDD

Goshhh ill miss stupid travis, ill miss this story somuch!

I loved this story! :) such a bittersweet ending, but you're a great writer and I really enjoyed reading this.

Ohmygod! I'm going to miss this story soooo much! I just love Kinley's character, so aggressive yet so emotional. But this has been a very emotional journey for Kinley.....so yeah!
Update soon!!! :D

I am so, so, so infinitely happy that she has a relationship with her dad now. Ohmygod. I know what it's like to not have your dad around and I wish I could do the same with mine.
Soe will always be there for her and that makes me happy too. :)

is it so wrong that I really hate her mom?
'cause I do.
I really, really, really hate her mom.
with a burning, fiery passion.
it's pretty intense.
I'm glad that she and Paul are all settled, though (:
I WANT HER TO MAKE HER MOM CRY.
please update soon? LOL.

NOOOOOO IT CAN'T BE THE END !

Well damn! I don't want it to be over!