The Core - Comments

This does start out well.

I'll just have to state for the record, that I'm commenting, for the "Comment Swap".

I find the red back ground distressing.

The story continue, much in the same mood, as far as I can see.
It's tantalizing, pulling me in, I'm at a loss, as to what to say, is there something missing, or is it the story that just fail to pull me all the way in?

I've instantly liked Lark, and how she sounds strong in her demeanor and not acting feeble with the way the others treated her when they first met her.

I like the premise of this and the world you've created -- I think you have an interesting stoyu set up here :)

I've just read the first 2 chapters of this and I thought it was pretty good. I liked it. The plot is interesting. At first I was a little confused, but then I started to get hang of it.

Nice job.

I've just read the first 2 chapters of this and I thought it was pretty good. I liked it. The plot is interesting. At first I was a little confused, but then I started to get hang of it.

Nice job.

This isn't something I'd usually read, but I'm enjoying this a lot. Very unique and I love your writing style. Very nice plot and whatnot as well, I like it. I look forward to more :) You're a very good writer.

I think this story has an amazing plot! The idea is new and fresh and I commend you for coming up with it!
I like the way you write and explain things to the reader. The only thing I didn't like was the dialogue. Sometimes it is really good and they speak in the tone that I imagined they'd have, but there are a few times when they speak in a slang more like people today. I might just think that because I want everyone to talk like Chris Hemsworth in Thor, but it was just something I noticed!

I wonder what's going to happen next? Please keep up your great work!

Wow, I love how your write. I love the way you give each character personality. Lark is really interesting and she behaves and speaks just like I would imagine someone of her status to.

As soon as I read the summary, I was interested to know more. It wasn't at all difficult to get into, and you use just enough amount of detail to describe without becoming too descriptive and boring.

I can't wait to read more! Keep up the good work. (:

I'm not gonna lie, I haven't seen this style of writing before
I'm not really into the style but it fits the story so well and helps me understand it more
Maybe it's just my writers block that isn't letting me understand some of these things and skipping over words but this is a great story!
Keep it up!

Hmm. This is really well written. But I'm not going to lie, it isn't my cup of tea. I love your style of writing, but personally not so much the subject of the story itself. I'd like to try any other stories you've written. Keep writing. :)

I'm not going to lie, I was a little skeptical of this story since I don't typically read stories like this. But I have to say the uniqueness really drew me in. Your writing has a sophistication and maturity to it that I really enjoy. I look forward for the next chapter.

I am really liking this. Very unique and different.
I have to say that I don't see any grammar problems or spelling. Really good. I am enjoying this. :)

Hahaha, Taylon kissed Lark and she slapped him for it! >w< How cute

Oh wow, we got some deviousness goin' on! Can't wait for the next chapter! ;)

Yay! Some wonderful interaction between lark and Taylon :3 I love so much!

Wonderful still!

Still loving this story! X3

Love this story! Can't wait to see whats going to happen! :)

We proof read the best we can. Whoops.

Wonderful story! Though I did notice a few spelling errors. I'd love to continue reading about Lark :3