Tallulah - Comments

Hmph. Men. Of course Marina had to ruin a perfectly good marriage and Addie had to be tempted to touch the fire and get himself burned by Lulu. She has every damn right. I'd kill the fool too -.-

Hmph. Men. Of course Marina had to ruin a perfectly good marriage and Addie had to be tempted to touch the fire and get himself burned by Lulu. She has every damn right. I'd kill the fool too -.-

O BUT TALLY GIRL, ADDIE REALLY IS LIKE TRENT SPOILER ALERT
ok so first of all i must say that Ashley Katchadorian was not completely at fault, she was at the Pearl Harbor museum ok ok
but Trisha is my ultimate fave
#PETEBERT
#PETEBERT WHERE U AT OUR GIRL TALLY NEEDS U
WHERE R U
SOS PLS SOMEONE HELP ME (((ACTUALLY SOMEONE HELP TALLY)))

This was interesting and you captured the stress of weddings well. If I was in their position I woukd elope too

I've finally read all of this and holy shit balls I love it a lot. I can't even explain to you how amazing of a writer you are. This could easily be published, in my opinion. I just... I love the historical background, the time you've taken to weave everything together just so-so. It's all perfectly done. I can't wait for you to update again. ❤️

Addie are u doing drugs omfg if u fuck dis shit up w/ ur life and all ((like w/ drugs if u know what i mean)) I WILL FUCK U UP
MY GIRL TALLY T DESERVES THE BEST ((COUGH WHOEVER THE BEST IS COUGH NOT QUITE SURE WHAT HIS NAME IS))
wait
is that why he was all jittery
bc he was gonna tell her WAIT
OH MY GOD HE PROPOSED OKAY THAT IS A BIG DEAL
I AM SORRY FOR THREATENING YOU ADDIE
but eventually u suck and beat her so yeah sorry not sorry

FRICK FRACK YEAH QUEEN OF THE WEST COAST
but ur queen of the East Coast ok

Oh my goodness! Addie seemed so shy and awkward, but very genuine when he asked Tallulah. That was adorable!

UM
TRENT
IS
A
FISH

AND WHAT ARE THOSE ITALICS IN THE BOTTOM
WHAT ARE YOU DOING
UGH KATIE ILY <3

p.s. love the writing super sassy phd yep thank u other super sassy phd who makes people like sassvannah mermaids

I just read this in one sitting and I am amazed! It is well-written and brilliant. I can't wait for the next update :-)

WAIT TRENT NEEDS TO GO
I HOPE HE BURNS IN HELL
ehehehe das funny bc allo her ex boyf or ex hubbs or w/e is/was a fireman ehehehEHEHEUEHUj
BUT KATIE
LEAVE HIM
THAT DICK DOES NOT DESERVE YOU OKAY HE BASICALLY SUCKS
SAY BYE LIKE I DO
BYE BITCH
JUST SAY IT
"BYE BITCH"

#PETEBERT THREW HER A SURPRISE PARTY
OH MY GOLLY GOODNESS
THEY'RE SO DIVINE
wait
Winona smiling
what
shocker
can Percy love me
bc if my girl Tally thinks she's rude then obvi she's rude
ADDIE YOU'RE PERFECT
OH MY GOD
WAIT YOU KISSED TALLY
AND
WAIT AND
BUT
SHE'S DATING ADONIS IS SHE NOT
OR THEY'RE A THING
WHATEVER IT IS ADDIE KISSED A TAKEN WOMAN OH MY GOD

I CALL EVERYONE TO JOIN ME IN THE FIGHT AGAINST SILENT READING
THE WEASTIES FANGIRL'S FANCLUB SUPPORTS THIS FIGHT, AND YOU SHOULD TOO
PLEASE HELP US IN THE FIGHT BY COMMENTING!

OF COURSE ALBERT IS AN EXCELLENT SKATER
SORRY THIS IS THE FIRST THING I FELT I HAD TO 100% COMMENT ON
of course

omg this line
If I thought that Albert and Momma were bad before, they were really bad after they found out about the baby.
qrl — oh my god HE JUST KICKED HER OUT OF THE KITCHLKESAJFD can i order me an albert not necessarily french but french would be ok (Y)
albert et peter c'est mon brotp
OH MY LORD SAVANNAH sassy even while she's pregnant damn
oh my god the anticipation about whether or not the baby's un homme ou une femme is killing meeeeee am i even speaking french right oops
OH
MY
GOD
TWINS
ABBIE
WHAT ARE YOU
DOING QRL
ARE YOU TRYNA KILL ME IS THAT IT BECAUSE I WAS ABSENT FOR LIKE 2 MONTHS
omg Sophie and Grandma started crying, and Jean and Grandpa got all proud and serious aherpa derpa DURR and n'aawwww tallulah naming dem babies
kennedy is a diva he will be a diva forever he will sass everyone and everything he can and maxine will be like her daddy and quiet and reserved and a sweetling
poor savannah
omg percy PEERRRRCCCYYYYYY HAHAHAHA RACHEL <3 ily omg tallulah's mum
OH MY GOD TALLULAH WHAT ARE YOU DOING "NO I DON'T WANT TO GO" NO GIRL YOU DO WANT TO GO ok so percy's a fish also, just like quinn, but i want her to go to homecoming, yenno? idk
ugh albert is so perfect oH MY GOD ALBERT AND PETER TEACHING HER HOW TO FIGHT oh lordy i can't see albert doing anything but going like "no do that" to peter
PERCY
oh. well then. I KNEW HE WAS A FISH
ah ice cream
fuckin' rachel what a shit friend. JOEY. okay honestly joey is much better than percy tbh and he seems really sweet kind of like albert ugh idk
wait.
hold up
HOLD
THE HELL
UP
WHAT IS THIS
THESE PARENTHESIS AND ITALICS
what are bar exams?
yay simone go, go, simone, go, go, simone, yay katie~
oh my god
greek last name
they're from greece
oooohhhh my, my, my papadopoulous sounds like the last name of this guy who used to go to my school but his sister graduated so he moved but yeah their last name is only one syllable less than papadopoulous too hard to spell
A D O N I S that name tHAT NAME also i'm very happy for tallulah and her becoming friends with euphemia who seems super duper cool, yenno, and omg agnes such a sweetie and i love barnabas (cos of his name) and uaglkdhflakjdfaoisajdlkf help abbie what are yoU DOING TO ME

girl, in utter seriousness, you write your relationships so perfectly. she was annoyed because he kept filming everyone and everything, even when they didn't want to be filmed — just that one part of a sentence and it's not even told by Euphemia and you can tell that they're related yenno like savannah and peter

omg adonis is manly he's a manly man manly men are manly
WHAT ARE THESE PARENTHESIS THIS IS GETTING SCARY omg their conversations ugh so cute
d a r l i n g
yay Joey ~
OH MY GOD ADONIS
HOW IS IT POSSIBLE THERE ARE MORE CHAPTERS I THINK I MAY DIE
hahaha braces on braces off lucky duck i had mine for seven years~
euphemia i love euphemia i feel like she's going to be the best most brilliant awesome character ever
oh my god something bad is happening
why.
n'aw tallulah's an adult now!
ah yes, euphemia, wonderful girl, and suscpiscpsususcupsiciousness OMG MAXINE WADDLES KENNEDY WADDLES TOO
omg how do you get a fry up your nose what a derp
AHHHHH SURPRISE PARTAY hahahahaha trent
HELP
SO
CUTE
"LULU"
OH
MY
GOD
ok this is it
i'm going to hit submit
abbie
stop
that is all imma say

Firstly, sorry that this is so ding dang late, it slipped my mind that I still owed you a comment. (I hope this was the story you swapped omfg I don't remember)

I like the layout, it's simple but it works, it's also dark which kind of matches the mood you set in the prologue.

I love the way the events unfolded in the prologue, how you revealed her pregnancy without straight up telling the reader and finishing the chapter by revealing why she is at the sherifs department. You ended the chapter with a sort of cliffhanger which definatly made me want to keep reading. Some people aren't very good at writing stories set in the past but you do it really well.

I don't notice any spelling or grammar mistakes, so that's a plus.

Overall from what I've read the story seems very interesting and different from most other things here on Mibba. I've recommended

I'M SCREAMING THIS IS PERFECT

IF ALBERT DOES NOT LIKE TRENT, THEN PETER OBVIOUSLY DOESNT BC #PETEBERT

who the fuck
popped holes
in my girl Tally's tires
i will bust
them
up
with some stale bagels
BEWARE OF FLYING STALE BAGELS should be plastered all over the town
because they're done for once i'm through with them
WAIT
ALBERT LEFT???
DOES THAT MEAN THAT
PETE AND BERT ARE NOT PETE AND BERT
INSTEAD OF #PETEBERT
THAT IS UNJUST
INCORRECT
WAIT
i'm just a lil bit confused as to what happened at school
like
did people think she broke in or something
was it a prank oh gosh what happened was there a fire but i don't think there was
ADONIS YOU SWEETHEART OH GOD
KISSING HER ON THE FOREHEAD
AND NO DON'T BLESS MY SWEET LIL' HEART, BLESS YOUR SWEET LIL' HEART OK YOU PERFECT QUEEN BEE

THIS,..TIS GTHAMSJX

I'M SORR Y BUT

OKAY

WOW
THIS IS
AMAZI NG

ADONIS YOU MOTHER FUCKER
I HATE YOU SO MUCH YOU PERFECT BEING
YOU CAN'T JUST SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT TO HER OMG
WHAT THE FUCK
"IT'S OKAY, 'CAUSE SHE CAN'T HOLD A CANDLE TO YOU ANYWAY"
ADONIS SHUT THE FUCK UP
I HATE YOU (((please come ravage me senseless)))

ADONIS YOU MOTHER FUCKER
I HATE YOU SO MUCH YOU PERFECT BEING UGH I'M SO ANGRY HE'S PERFECT WHAT THE HELL
THIS IS NOT COOL NOT FAIR UGH ADONIS WHY
AZALEA
YOU AIN'T SNEAKY AT ALL
i totally called it tho
totally called him noticing her
in my mind
idk what i'm saying ugh Adonis u make girls mushy, embarrassed messes with ur flawlessness jusT GO

GREEK PEOPLE OH MY GOODNESS BEE STOP IT YOU ARE KILLING ME
GREEK BOYS BOIZ BOIZ
SOMETHING SOMETHING SOMETHING (TRYING TO PULL A GAGA RN)
oh my god
oh my god
of course you named him Adonis bc he is Adonis reiNCARNATE JESUS

Adonis Papadopoulos, the mysterious boy who had taken my heart away when he gave me his sweatshirt.

that was like
the most perfect line omg
i'm so in love
ADONIS
BE MINE

I really enjoyed the second chapter. You have a way with describing the setting without blatantly stating it, something I appreciate. You have skill in using colloquialism to portray setting and it also helps describe the characters.

Really great job. I enjoyed every bit of it. It was so compelling that I am excited to read the third chapter.

I am not exactly sure why, but I love when Savannah says, "'Get my name out of your goddamn mouth"'

Anyways, great job.