When Night Breaks - Comments

  • TheShiningSoul

    TheShiningSoul (150)

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    Wow ! This is just exceptional and it flows really well! I've already read 5 or so chapters and I'm really intrigued :D I love how there is already a bond forming between Jay and Samantha and how strong his feelings are starting to get towards her... I love this xxxxxx
    January 25th, 2014 at 11:21pm
  • chelseycate

    chelseycate (150)

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    @ discoveringclouds
    Haha! Love your comment!
    January 3rd, 2014 at 06:56am
  • discoveringclouds

    discoveringclouds (200)

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    Get married! There's too much kissing!

    No one understands <\3 except the people
    In the relationship.
    January 3rd, 2014 at 05:57am
  • chelseycate

    chelseycate (150)

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    @ BrittanyMorgan
    Thank you! And I appreciate you reading! :)
    January 2nd, 2014 at 08:10pm
  • BrittanyMorgan

    BrittanyMorgan (100)

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    Happy new year to you too! I love where this story is going, by the way. :D
    January 2nd, 2014 at 10:07am
  • discoveringclouds

    discoveringclouds (200)

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    I found this. I can't believe it! I thought to find a nice sweet story admist the weird stories up here on mibba and then I happen upon this. A Story with a heart.

    I read it all at once. It's so lovely in different ways but has the relalities of life. The undertone of forgiveness and helping each other and being true to your morals is there. I love it.

    Great job. Keep writing. You give me hope that there are more great stories out there. :')
    December 5th, 2013 at 12:58pm
  • FrozenFrozenFrozen.

    FrozenFrozenFrozen. (100)

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    Ha-ha. I love how Samantha gets him to come to dinner! I'm curious to know how it's all going to go down! I'm going to read the next chapter next. :) Good job!
    December 5th, 2013 at 02:17am
  • chelseycate

    chelseycate (150)

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    @ etoile.
    Thank you so much! ^.^
    December 4th, 2013 at 06:29am
  • kahlo

    kahlo (100)

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    JAY DON'T MESS THIS UP.
    ITS TURKEY DAY SON
    TAKE IT EASY
    but omg talk about plot development??!?!??!?! Kara & Katrina??? YOOOO that was crazy omg AND IAN IS DEAD???
    like I didn't like him but damn girl how could you just boom kill him
    THE MCKENZIES
    y'all crazy omg jay watch out and sammi too D:
    but omg Leo is team jay & sammi WHOOOOOOO
    this is perf
    December 4th, 2013 at 05:46am
  • kahlo

    kahlo (100)

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    jay you need to get a hold on your girl okay
    um she's getting hit on by some creepy weirdo idk like he's makin' me really upset ya feel
    no jay no
    NO YOU AND SAMMI ARE GOING TO BE HAPPY DAMN IT
    December 3rd, 2013 at 01:21am
  • kahlo

    kahlo (100)

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    ian get away from my baby
    GET AWAY FROM SAMMI
    damn it jay where are you when i need you
    u kno wut lacey ur a bad bff
    breaking up my otp
    HOW DARE YOU
    smh File
    December 3rd, 2013 at 01:00am
  • kahlo

    kahlo (100)

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    ian get away from my baby
    GET AWAY FROM SAMMI
    damn it jay where are you when i need you
    u kno wut lacey ur a bad bff
    breaking up my otp
    HOW DARE YOU
    smh File
    December 3rd, 2013 at 01:00am
  • kahlo

    kahlo (100)

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    okay so like
    this is a tiny error
    but i'm like really nutty about dialogue grammar like it's really bad omg
    um
    like here in chapter six
    um
    "Knock knock" I heard Lacey say...
    there should be a comma after knock and before that end quotation mark because it's something that Lacey is saying, even if it's a sound
    "I mean, I don't wanna look like a slob"
    and that should have a period after slob (though sammi bb u kno u sexy ok i don't kno wut u on about u got like aliens in luv wit u and all that so shush girl) because um it's the end of the quotation and the end of the sentence
    some simple editing and taking a few minutes to look at the chapter before it's actually posted can do a world of good! but everyone makes mistakes so it's good son
    it's all good
    this is a super awesome amazing article on dialogue and how to write it properly (i'm telling ya 'cause i care okay babe)
    December 3rd, 2013 at 12:59am
  • kahlo

    kahlo (100)

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    jay & sammi for ever
    ya her name is sammi with an i
    deal with it
    and ya
    i'm shippin' them
    HARD
    c'est la vie son
    December 3rd, 2013 at 12:51am
  • kahlo

    kahlo (100)

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    SO. I'M HERE. READING. FINALLY. (praise the lord that i finally have some free time yay
    aliens & humans
    you've pleased me greatly
    (i'm only on like chapter 4 but girl this story is a keeper whoo~)
    December 3rd, 2013 at 12:46am
  • chelseycate

    chelseycate (150)

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    @ Skarsgard of Sweden
    Thank you! Glad you enjoyed it!
    November 9th, 2013 at 06:58pm
  • Theo Rossi;

    Theo Rossi; (150)

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    I love the update. It's amazing.
    November 9th, 2013 at 04:05pm
  • chelseycate

    chelseycate (150)

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    @ BrittanyMorgan
    Awe thanks! :)
    November 9th, 2013 at 07:24am
  • BrittanyMorgan

    BrittanyMorgan (100)

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    @ Artist Vs. Poet

    Love your name by the way :D
    November 9th, 2013 at 07:08am
  • BrittanyMorgan

    BrittanyMorgan (100)

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    @ Artist Vs. Poet

    How could I not read? Always up for a good story!!
    November 9th, 2013 at 07:08am