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This Is Not About Vampires

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  1. I Hate People, the Sun, and Casseroles and the Girls Who Bring Them to my Door
  2. I Hate Roll Call, Surveys, Breakfast Themed Jewelry and the Teachers Who Wear it
  3. I Hate Walking to the Nurse, Self Proclaimed Vampire Hunters, and not Having a Hall Pass
  4. I Hate School Nurses, Spelling the Word 'Tenacious', and People Breathing on my Face
  5. I Hate Painting Joy, Mismatched Clothes, and Glitter and the Horny Girls who Pour it on my Head
  6. I Hate Plastic Food, Being Hit On, Tight Pants, and Garlic Bread
  7. I Hate My Lit Teacher, Over-Articulation, Partner Projects (Sort of), and People Who Scream in Class
  8. I Hate Telemarketers, Signing Casts, and Casseroles and the Girls Who Bring Them to my Door (Still)
  9. I Hate the Number Four, Delirious Wolf Boys Who Want to be My Friend, and Crossbows
  10. I Hate Missing the Jugular, People in the Hallways, and Forgetting the Name of Your Lit Partner
  11. I Hate In-Class Lab Time, Computers That Work, and Mrs. Webster's Tongue
  12. I Hate PA Systems, People Who Look Up, and Girls Without Friends That Point at Yours
  13. I Hate Pedophiles Who Don't Know It's Saturday, Farting Secretaries, and Gullible Breakfast Eaters
  14. I Hate 'Code Red' Lockdowns, Vacuum Cleaners, and Black Holes
  15. I Hate Parking, Getting My Aglets Chewed by a Shurpa, and Meeting Moms Who Kill the Undead
  16. I Hate Family Lunches, Knife-Throwing Moms, and Cakes with Frosting Purification Runes
  17. I Hate the Abnormal 4th Wall, Battering Rams, Garlic Cookies, and People Who Fall in Love
  18. I Love My Friends, Revolution, and Imploding Buildings of Learning