So I sat there for hours reading through everything I've ever written.And holy shit im sorry, I suck.There was a couple here and there I thought were good but over all I think I've written some pretty dumb shit :/So to everyone who has sat there and read my stuff. I'm sorry I wasted most of your time.I feel as I've grown in the past several years my style has changed and Yada yada, whatever.I...

I'm not in the mood to write right now, I just want to talk, to whom? I don't know, I don't care. Not anymore.I should feel bored, I should feel angry, sad, upset.I have lost two of the closest friends I had because I cannot trust them.I no longer need such things; friendship, compassion for someone, love.I was told maybe it is because I don't trust myself, if that were possible I'd be a fool.I...

HAHAHAHA.She's egging it onnnn..I can feel it at the edges of my mind, the blackness.That same blackness that has followed in my shadow through out my life..Oh but she... But SHE!Oh how it would be so easy.. to let the blackness spread through the rest of my mind..while she stands there in front of me..Oh it would be.....So easy.But noo... BUT NOOOThe egging... the provoking..The insults... the...

My name is Zach....I'm just hurting..I'm alone it feels..but I have both my parents, 3 younger siblings and a girlfriend...victim not happy..I'm conflicted with everlasting emotions of hate for when my parents sent me away and ruined every chance I had at being happy..I suffer from depression, high anxiety, PTSD, and mild schizophrenia now..All I'm asking for is a bit of happiness..I love my...

Its like his hands are resting on my shoulders..I can almost feel them...Cold..dead..stained with the blood he has spilled for me..You've done so much for me...you saved me..and then you killed me..You CLAIM TO BE STRONG?! YOU COULDNT EVEN SAVE ME!!!You watched...as they beat me ...you watched my own blood smear the walls as I tried to run..You watched me cry myself to sleep...every night...you...

So I've realized something.. I'm fucking ashamed to even think of myself as a human being.. I'd be happier and gladly accept myself as a monster and be done with it. This entire world was slowly manufactured on pure bullshit. A woman sued McDonalds for millions because her coffee didn't say it was hot and it burned her. Congratu-fucking-lations.I don't know if I can abide by mibba rules on this...

Well..Another day another pointless, emotional seeping blog..But ha..who the fuck else will even listen right?I mean..I try to explain these things..going on inside me, in my head..but it's like..I can't find words to even measure to a fraction of it's immensity..Rage would be the biggest understatement of the century for me.The last couple days I don't understand.. I feel something bothering...

So a bit closer to home now..I hadn't been on to state what happened but.Well about a week ago me, my girlfriend, and her friend got in a wicked rollover car accident..flying off the highway and rolling four tines after smashing into the ground.. Immediately afterwards we were arrested without medical attention or being read our rights..both of them got banged up and concussed where as I was...

Here again.. Another grey morning and night with no sleep in sight..The girl I think I love more than anything soundly asleep next to me.. Wether there is a growing life inside her or not..that is yet to be proven officially though..I take up my clothes and get dressed..I walk past her grandma as she mutters things to me..never sure if she is truly speaking to me or the phantoms of her past.. Even...

So my girlfriend and I have split up...It makes me sad... It was my home...she was my home..And all she does is push me further and further away..Not sure what to do....other than get Fucked up everyday..I wanna go back to my old ways...but I don't know...id like to live a little longer..if I even care about that sort of them..My best friend went back to the army so...I'm alone....again...Back to...

So lately I've been away a little bit just practicing.I hired a new guitarist for the band so we've been having a hay day.I would hope people want to check us out.. I need some likes for the band so we can get out there andget motivated.FUCK\\BRB BATHROOM uOkay. whoa that was insane.Anywaywww.facebook.com/EmbracingtheAnimositythat's the band pageSend some likes our wayOn other notes I'm just...

So lately I've been away a little bit just practicing.I hired a new guitarist for the band so we've been having a hay day.I would hope people want to check us out.. I need some likes for the band so we can get out there andget motivated.FUCK\\BRB BATHROOM uOkay. whoa that was insane.Anywaywww.facebook.com/EmbracingtheAnimositythat's the band pageSend some likes our wayOn other notes I'm just...

All of those days.. of violence.. are almost like a blur of bloodshed.Clarifying.In a military institution.. I was destroyed. I went in 14 years old..People talk about bullying like..in school in stuff...yeah..ive had that all my life. I was always the anti social kid who didn't give a shit about anyone..so I was shunned for it my whole life.But this..no..this wasnt bullying..this was pure fucking...

I remember the dreams...Those I had when I was sent away...when I was tortured for two years.. when I snapped..Its like the madness attracted him to me..He changed me..He made me how I am.. He was the embodiment of everything I felt... He was my fucking demon..I remember in my dreams..he would play with me..night like..go to the park and shit..but..toy with me. He would tie me up..and stare at...

Okay just to be clear so no one worries.. Laying At Last wasNot what you might think..I had done something like it a long time agoAnd wanted to try again..Im not suicidal at all..Thats just a point of view from years ago..when I wasAnnnnnnd. Lets take another shot.........Yum!So half a person 2 was different.. it went off in a totally different fucking direction. But it was fun..It was something I...

Im sorry but this blogging shit is awesome..I spend so much time writing that I hardly get to let loose with it. And the blogs are pretty much where I can be myself with people.. yeah a whole mystery thing is cool and all..but boredom is an easy ally.So im not sure if the part two of the "Half the person" midget series thing is gonna be similar to part one..but the least I can hope for is it is...

Some things you may not know about me..lol sorry still haven't slept and in 10 minutes im gonna be staring at a bottle of jack daniels, jaggermeister, wine and something else...I forgot..im already fucked up..I love to party. I dont give a fuck about authority . I love to scream and sing..I love putting on a show and making everyone mosh and break shit. I go pretty damn hard when it comes to the...

I guess it's mostly my own doing..but I was pressing really really really really hard for my new piece "Half the Person"I hit a mental rut like all writers should..And no matter how hard I dug i couldn't get anything out..I wanted to make something different..Something that hits deep and right at home. and hard. And that will leave someone just sitting there for a bit just thinking..I wanted to...

I meant for this blog to be posted a while ago but it was deleted because of profanity in the title..(So like me)I was allowed to re post it if I removed the profanity...I knew there was some kind of rules against cussing but I wasn't sure where.Didn't really read things I should have (Also like me)I'm glad that I know now because I strongly believe in expression..whatever kind it is.(Mine is...

Well..Well..Well..Well..Well..WellWell I have no idea, why not ask someone else?So my son likes to headbutt me for some reason, being two months old, youd think it would hurt..but no he just smiles away afterwards. Other than that my fingers are too big for the touch keys on my phone so I end up correcting like every other word..which is getting fucking...