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Scandalous Scholastics

At Clandestine Prepratory High the teachers are on a mission. They're a small, experimental high school, set on developing student/teacher relations.

The kids are crazy, the teachers are entertaining, and the principal is just hoping to make it through the school year in one piece.

The faculty:
Principal: Tarra Bratton
Counselor: Heaven Hayward
Nurse: Sarah Parker
Secretary: William Beckett
Math: Brendon Urie
Science: Joe Trohman/Lyn-Z
English: Pete Wentz/Amanda Palmer
Music: Patrick Stumph/Greta Salpater
History:Spencer Smith/Cassadee Pope
Janitor: Gabe Saporta
French:Ryan Ross
Gardener: Bob Bryar
Art: Gerard Way
Photography-Nicole Williams
Librarian: Mikey Way and Ray Toro
Security: Zack, Worm and Dirty
Produce: Travis McCoy
School Board: Vicky-T

[Crack-fic]

Joint writing with Sarah
  1. 1+1=Trousers
    "Oh, you know," Jon says airly, "Angst angst angst. I'm a teen. I'm hormonal and don't deal with it very well."
  2. Rick Rolled
    She liked when kids would come into her room with a fake headache or stomach ache just to get out class. It was like she was looking at a younger version of herself, only she was better at faking it then them.
  3. What the Mesopotamia?
    "That is so sad, Spencer Smith," Heaven shakes her head with a mock frowny face, "I used to love Mesopotamia."
  4. Bowie makes it better
    Spencer knew what his smile did to most of the female staff.
  5. Frank Iero Paints Unicorns
    "No I didn't wet myself," Gerard huffs, getting to his feet, "I'm going home. I don't know why I even bothered stopping by here in the first place."
  6. A New Kind of Evil
    “A pep rally?” Tarra guessed, her eyes scanning over different dates.
  7. Dive Bomb
    "There will be no beer at the next house party," Heaven says, and Dirty gasps, clutching his heart.
  8. Faux Romantics
    Sarah spent the next few days, staying clear of the staff, and most of the students.
  9. Drive By Dodge Balling
    "Oooh," Spencer catcalls, walking into the library with Ryan, "You tried to get naughty with the creepy art teacher?"
  10. Lover Boy
    “Great. Just great.” Heaven sighed, dropping her head onto her desk.
  11. One, Three, FIVE
    Sarah does not take sympathy on Heaven's poor head. Sarah doesn't take sympathy on her bumps or bruises.
  12. Too Much Tounge
    Heaven rolled her eyes at the morning announcements.
  13. The Tweetians Are Coming
    gerardway: @nellsays I know right? i can totally twitter from my ma's basement
  14. A little lawn sport, anyone?
    “It’s not my fault.” Sarah gasped, dropping her sandwich. “He keeps starting it!”
  15. Pumpkin Patch Fun
    "Yeah, we really really are," Heaven says, and then they're both laughing in a dark closet. It's perfect.
  16. Do the trick or treat
  17. Served Cold or Over Easy
    “The district denied the funding,” Tarra says from behind her, “Now drink your coffee and shut up. Some of us like to pretend it tastes good..”