So what's a live blog, you ask?
I'm doing live blogs of fics because there have been a lot of amazing ones I've read. So I'm gonna be posting my reactions as I read them because I think it'll be fun, it gives me an excuse to read these fics again and I'm also showing you that you should check out these fics as well because they're just so beautiful.
My other live blogs
Seasons
Heartbreaker
The Rushing of the Water
Pressing Flowers
Come and Go
Sincerely Lovesick
Tides [Pt. 1]
Tides [Pt. 2]
Tides [Pt. 3]
The Band Shippers Vigilante Coalition
Daydream
From States Away
Starry Skyline
Try to Take Us Down
Oh
Just Hold Me
I’M GOING TO BE PUTTING MYSELF THROUGH HURT AGAIN. Alright, I’m going to be live blogging Sunday by the fabulous Jacqui. It’s the sequel to Daydream, which I’ve live blogged before and it shows what’s become of Alex and Jenna’s relationship after Alex reveals his true feelings to her after a night of playing strip poker and tequila shots. Needless to say, this gave me so many feels and hurt me bad, but I want to live blog it to show you how amazing it is and because Alex has been in my head lately since I’ve written him recently.
Here we go again! W00t.
SUNDAY: CHAPTER 1:
- So each fic is based around an ATL song. Daydream was inspired by “A Daydream Away” and Sunday is inspired by “Remembering Sunday”.
- AKA my favorite.
- Also the song that RIPS ME TO SHREDS. That is the first sign that this is going to hurt. I know what’s going to happen but I AM STILL SCARED OKAY. BANDAGES. I NEED BANDAGES.
- Listening to it with rainy mood. And my tears will obviously provide more rain. So much rain that it will cause a big thunderstorm.
- And it begins with Alex waking up at two in the morning. Let me say that nothing good happens after 2 AM. NOTHING.
- “Leave.”
- That’s the first thing Jenna says in this fic. Alex wakes up—at a ridiculous time at that—and she just straight up tells him to leave.
- OUCH. Somebody get this girl a jacket because she is cold and poor Alex doesn’t even protest or anything. He just goes with it because apparently he’s gotten used to her doing this.
- There is no snappy reply or snarky comment this time; you’ve already fallen asleep, your face slack and relaxed.
- So she doesn’t give him any shit this time. I repeat, this time. THIS TIME.
- T H I S. T I M E.
- Oh my god, she’s done this many times and the only reason she didn’t do it this time was because she was too sleepy to do it. BUT YOU KNOW SHE WAS THINKING OF DOING IT.
- Do you have any idea what this did to me. Ugh, my feels. I’m hurting right now because I’m just wondering what happened to these two since the prequel because last time they were so cute and playful and sweet to each other.
- But not here. Oh no, definitely not here. They went from being best friends to fuck buddies and it is screwing their relationship up because Alex just wants Jenna to be his but she doesn’t want any strings attached and she’s so cruel.
- JENNA HOW ABOUT YOU STOP.
- And then two weeks later, he’s fallen asleep in her bed and wait. What’s this.
- ...you didn’t get a chance to throw me out
- THE HURT CONTINUES. SHE DIDN’T GET A CHANCE TO THROW HIM OUT. HE WAS EXPECTING HER TO THROW HIM OUT BECAUSE THIS HAS BEEN A REGULAR THING.
- This has been going on for months. Months.
- SHE HAS BEEN HURTING POOR LEX FOR MONTHS AND HE KNOWS THEY SHOULDN’T BE DOING THIS, BUT HE DOESN’T DO ANYTHING BECAUSE HE CAN’T GET HIMSELF AWAY FROM HER.
- SOMETHING’S TELLING ME TO LEAVE, BUT I WON’T. ‘CAUSE I’M DAMNED IF I DO YA. DAMNED IF I DON’T.
- That song fits so much it hurts. It really does.
- Can I call this series the “Tequila Shots” series. Because all of this hurtful stuff happened because of tequila shots in the dark scene of the crime.
- And when he tries to wake her up, she responds by telling him to fuck off.
- Well, shit, Jenna. Good morning to you, too.
- Then again, I wouldn’t be so happy if someone woke me up but I’d just be all “can you not” while Jenna is being so damn cold like twenty below.
- Despite how much she treats him like shit, he still does these sweet things for her. Like give her a kiss on the top of her head or make her breakfast. Aww, Alex you sweetheart.
- It’s sad. For a brief moment when he’s making breakfast, he feels like they’re something more. He feels like they’re actually a couple, but then reality sets in and reminds him that no, they are not. And he’s not even sure if they’ll ever be one.
- Don’t mind me. Just holding a glass full of my tears that may or may not overflow and ruin the keyboard.
- Psh, and she tries to apologize. Like hell nah, I ain’t tolerating that shit but Alex does and I swear, you lovesick fool. THIS IS WHY SHE KEEPS HURTING YOU. BECAUSE YOU KEEP FORGIVING HER.
- I love you, Alex. But sometimes. Sometimes. Ugh.
- They eat together, but in silence. Just. Silence. See, I bet before all this hurt they could talk on and on and be cute and whatnot but it’s not like that anymore and I don’t like how this is going because ouch. JUST BE HAPPY TOGETHER AND KISS. IT’S NOT THAT HARD.
- WELL APPARENTLY IT’S HARD FOR JENNA. DAMMIT JENNA WHY YOU GOTTA BE LIKE THAT BOO.
- Then Alex doesn’t return. He decides to just lose all contact with her and ignore her calls and keep himself from going to her place because he’s being so emotionally damaged by this unrequited love and he just wants to stop pining after her.
- DO NOT WORRY YOUR MOTHER, ALEXANDER GASKARTH.
- If that were me, my mom would’ve killed me. I mean, even if I didn’t answer once, she would be hella mad, which is why I always make sure I have my phone near me because I value my life.
- The poor guy just can’t stop thinking about her. Come on, he’s taking fruit out of his fridge and thinks of her. Who does that? Well, Alex does now because Jenna’s messing with his mind yo.
- He keeps trying to think of a reason not to hold onto these feelings. Wait HE THREW AWAY THE FRUIT WHY YOU COULD’VE EATEN THAT OR MAKE SMOOTHIES OR SOMETHING.
- But wait, he would’ve just ended up sniffing the smoothie. Nevermind, throwing them away is a good idea.
- EDIT: Okay it was rotten. Yeah, throwing it away was the only option.
SUNDAY: CHAPTER 2
- OH GOD. THIS IS WHERE I NEED TO PROTECT MY STOMACH FROM GETTING PUNCHED BECAUSE OF ALL THE HURT THAT HAPPENS IN THIS CHAPTER.
- I DIDN’T SET UP ARMOR. OR PREPARE HOT CHOCOLATE. I AM VULNERABLE.
- I THINK WE’RE EVEN RUNNING OUT OF ICE CREAM.
- SOMEBODY SAVE ME.
- She finally gets it that he’s not coming to her, so she comes to him and oh no this is where it gets bad and hurtful.
- Her hair is different. It’s like she’s a different person and it matches the mood. HER HAIR ISN’T LIGHT AS IT USED TO BE. BECAUSE SHE’S PISSED. SHE IS NOT HAPPY AND NEITHER IS ALEX. AND AND I’M JUST HUGGING MY PILLOW AS A SAD ATTEMPT TO PROTECT MYSELF.
- Ooh, and Sassy Alex. I kind of giggled but then I was like WAIT. THIS ISN’T GOING TO END WELL. STOP IT WITH THE SASS ALEX. NOT THE TIME. OR PLACE. NO.
- You can feel the tension. Oh god, and it’s the bad tension.
- In the cold you look so fierce, but I’m warming up ‘cause the tension’s like a fire.
- Then. THEN. THEEEEEN. HE DOES IT.
- HE DOES THE THING.
- HE SAYS SOMETHING TO HER.
- AND YOU KNOW WHAT HE SAYS.
- “fuck you, bitch”
- THIS LINE HAD ME SO CONFLICTED. IT MESSED ME UP, BRUH. BECAUSE AT FIRST YOU FEEL LIKE SHE DESERVES IT AFTER ALL THE SHIT SHE’S DONE TO POOR LEX.
- BUT THEN IT’S STILL KIND OF HARSH. AND ALEX DOESN’T REALIZE WHAT HE DID UNTIL HE SLAMS THE DOOR ON HER.
- HIS REGRET IS NOT HELPING.
- I’M STILL KINDA GLAD HE SAID THAT BECAUSE FOR ONCE HE’S LETTING HER KNOW THAT HE’S GETTIN’ REAL TIRED OF HER SHIT.
- Nope it’s too late. Can’t take the words back and Alex is like WHAT HAVE I DONE.
- “I’m not coming back – screw you Alex!”
- She’s hurt bad and she’s crying and Alex is feeling even worse seeing her like that and just watches her leave.
- But all I can picture is you – you in your essence. Your natural coloured hair from a few months ago, the erotic expression on your face from many nights spent alone, all of your curves, from hips to chest and even the delicate concave arc of your spine. Your spindly fingers that are adept at dealing out cards and your powers of persuasion. Your laugh in summer, and the way your tanned skin slowly fades in winter. The passion you pour into singing and the way you stretch out your vowels when you talk.
- He’s so in love with her. No matter what they’ve been through, he can’t get himself to stop these feelings because all he can see is all the things he loves about her. This paragraph was beautiful. He’s so very conflicted and I just want to give him all the hugs.
- WHO COULD DENY THESE BUTTERFLIES.
- NO MATTER WHAT, HE BELIEVES THAT JENNA’S WORTH IT. SO HE’S GONNA GO GET HER.
- IT’S GOING TO RAIN.
- RAIN IS NEVER A SIGN OF GOOD THINGS.
- UNLESS IT’S A NICHOLAS SPARKS BOOK WHERE THEY KISS AND STUFF BUT THIS ISN’T NICHOLAS SPARKS.
- He knocks on her door and he gets no answer. Oh no. Nonononononono not good. I do not sense any happiness that could come out of this.
- I DON’T MEAN TO BE A BOTHER BUT HAVE YOU SEEN THIS GIRL.
- “She’s gone.”
- HOW DID THIS KNIFE GET IN MY STOMACH. SERIOUSLY THAT LINE JUST DECIDED TO COME AND PIERCE MY BODY.
- I HAD A FEELING THIS WOULD HAPPEN BECAUSE OF THE SONG.
- THE SONG.
- THE HURTFUL SONG.
- BUT I STILL GOT BADLY STABBED.
- She bought a plane ticket that morning and omg that’s why she wanted to talk to Alex it was important but all he did was tell her off.
- EVEN WORSE. After rereading this, I realized that the last words she said to him before taking off was “Screw you, Alex.”
- PUSHING. THE KNIFE. DEEPER.
- And I bet in time, he realized that too and probably hates himself for doing that to her. He must’ve felt so awful.
- She hates flying. But she still got a ticket and left, meaning she would rather be on a plane than near him and that’s saying something.
- TWISTING. THE. KNIFE.
- AND ALEX JUST GOES HOME AND TRIES TO CALL HER. BUT NO ANSWER.
- “Jenna, please be okay.”
- THAT’S HOW THIS FIC ENDS. JENNA NEEDS TO BE OKAY. POOR ALEX IS A WRECK AND EVERYTHING IS BROKEN AND NO MY TEARS ARE FALLING.
- I’ve realized that the Hayliver gang not only hurts Hayley and Oli, but we also hurt poor Alex. Like Jacqui has hurt him with how hopelessly in love he is with Jenna, I’ve hurt him with his unresolved feelings for Meg, Shay has hurt him with multiple things, Nikko killed him off. My poor baby has been through so much.
- Rianne you’re the only one who hasn’t hurt him. YOU’RE OUR ONLY HOPE.
- ALEX NEEDS MORE HAPPY.
- NOT TO WORRY ALEX. I AM COMING WITH A BLANKET AND HOT CHOCOLATE AND COOKIES.
- So each fic is based around an ATL song. Daydream was inspired by “A Daydream Away” and Sunday is inspired by “Remembering Sunday”.
- AKA my favorite.
- Also the song that RIPS ME TO SHREDS. That is the first sign that this is going to hurt. I know what’s going to happen but I AM STILL SCARED OKAY. BANDAGES. I NEED BANDAGES.
- Listening to it with rainy mood. And my tears will obviously provide more rain. So much rain that it will cause a big thunderstorm.
- And it begins with Alex waking up at two in the morning. Let me say that nothing good happens after 2 AM. NOTHING.
- “Leave.”
- That’s the first thing Jenna says in this fic. Alex wakes up—at a ridiculous time at that—and she just straight up tells him to leave.
- OUCH. Somebody get this girl a jacket because she is cold and poor Alex doesn’t even protest or anything. He just goes with it because apparently he’s gotten used to her doing this.
- There is no snappy reply or snarky comment this time; you’ve already fallen asleep, your face slack and relaxed.
- So she doesn’t give him any shit this time. I repeat, this time. THIS TIME.
- T H I S. T I M E.
- Oh my god, she’s done this many times and the only reason she didn’t do it this time was because she was too sleepy to do it. BUT YOU KNOW SHE WAS THINKING OF DOING IT.
- Do you have any idea what this did to me. Ugh, my feels. I’m hurting right now because I’m just wondering what happened to these two since the prequel because last time they were so cute and playful and sweet to each other.
- But not here. Oh no, definitely not here. They went from being best friends to fuck buddies and it is screwing their relationship up because Alex just wants Jenna to be his but she doesn’t want any strings attached and she’s so cruel.
- JENNA HOW ABOUT YOU STOP.
- And then two weeks later, he’s fallen asleep in her bed and wait. What’s this.
- ...you didn’t get a chance to throw me out
- THE HURT CONTINUES. SHE DIDN’T GET A CHANCE TO THROW HIM OUT. HE WAS EXPECTING HER TO THROW HIM OUT BECAUSE THIS HAS BEEN A REGULAR THING.
- This has been going on for months. Months.
- SHE HAS BEEN HURTING POOR LEX FOR MONTHS AND HE KNOWS THEY SHOULDN’T BE DOING THIS, BUT HE DOESN’T DO ANYTHING BECAUSE HE CAN’T GET HIMSELF AWAY FROM HER.
- SOMETHING’S TELLING ME TO LEAVE, BUT I WON’T. ‘CAUSE I’M DAMNED IF I DO YA. DAMNED IF I DON’T.
- That song fits so much it hurts. It really does.
- Can I call this series the “Tequila Shots” series. Because all of this hurtful stuff happened because of tequila shots in the dark scene of the crime.
- And when he tries to wake her up, she responds by telling him to fuck off.
- Well, shit, Jenna. Good morning to you, too.
- Then again, I wouldn’t be so happy if someone woke me up but I’d just be all “can you not” while Jenna is being so damn cold like twenty below.
- Despite how much she treats him like shit, he still does these sweet things for her. Like give her a kiss on the top of her head or make her breakfast. Aww, Alex you sweetheart.
- It’s sad. For a brief moment when he’s making breakfast, he feels like they’re something more. He feels like they’re actually a couple, but then reality sets in and reminds him that no, they are not. And he’s not even sure if they’ll ever be one.
- Don’t mind me. Just holding a glass full of my tears that may or may not overflow and ruin the keyboard.
- Psh, and she tries to apologize. Like hell nah, I ain’t tolerating that shit but Alex does and I swear, you lovesick fool. THIS IS WHY SHE KEEPS HURTING YOU. BECAUSE YOU KEEP FORGIVING HER.
- I love you, Alex. But sometimes. Sometimes. Ugh.
- They eat together, but in silence. Just. Silence. See, I bet before all this hurt they could talk on and on and be cute and whatnot but it’s not like that anymore and I don’t like how this is going because ouch. JUST BE HAPPY TOGETHER AND KISS. IT’S NOT THAT HARD.
- WELL APPARENTLY IT’S HARD FOR JENNA. DAMMIT JENNA WHY YOU GOTTA BE LIKE THAT BOO.
- Then Alex doesn’t return. He decides to just lose all contact with her and ignore her calls and keep himself from going to her place because he’s being so emotionally damaged by this unrequited love and he just wants to stop pining after her.
- DO NOT WORRY YOUR MOTHER, ALEXANDER GASKARTH.
- If that were me, my mom would’ve killed me. I mean, even if I didn’t answer once, she would be hella mad, which is why I always make sure I have my phone near me because I value my life.
- The poor guy just can’t stop thinking about her. Come on, he’s taking fruit out of his fridge and thinks of her. Who does that? Well, Alex does now because Jenna’s messing with his mind yo.
- He keeps trying to think of a reason not to hold onto these feelings. Wait HE THREW AWAY THE FRUIT WHY YOU COULD’VE EATEN THAT OR MAKE SMOOTHIES OR SOMETHING.
- But wait, he would’ve just ended up sniffing the smoothie. Nevermind, throwing them away is a good idea.
- EDIT: Okay it was rotten. Yeah, throwing it away was the only option.
SUNDAY: CHAPTER 2
- OH GOD. THIS IS WHERE I NEED TO PROTECT MY STOMACH FROM GETTING PUNCHED BECAUSE OF ALL THE HURT THAT HAPPENS IN THIS CHAPTER.
- I DIDN’T SET UP ARMOR. OR PREPARE HOT CHOCOLATE. I AM VULNERABLE.
- I THINK WE’RE EVEN RUNNING OUT OF ICE CREAM.
- SOMEBODY SAVE ME.
- She finally gets it that he’s not coming to her, so she comes to him and oh no this is where it gets bad and hurtful.
- Her hair is different. It’s like she’s a different person and it matches the mood. HER HAIR ISN’T LIGHT AS IT USED TO BE. BECAUSE SHE’S PISSED. SHE IS NOT HAPPY AND NEITHER IS ALEX. AND AND I’M JUST HUGGING MY PILLOW AS A SAD ATTEMPT TO PROTECT MYSELF.
- Ooh, and Sassy Alex. I kind of giggled but then I was like WAIT. THIS ISN’T GOING TO END WELL. STOP IT WITH THE SASS ALEX. NOT THE TIME. OR PLACE. NO.
- You can feel the tension. Oh god, and it’s the bad tension.
- In the cold you look so fierce, but I’m warming up ‘cause the tension’s like a fire.
- Then. THEN. THEEEEEN. HE DOES IT.
- HE DOES THE THING.
- HE SAYS SOMETHING TO HER.
- AND YOU KNOW WHAT HE SAYS.
- “fuck you, bitch”
- THIS LINE HAD ME SO CONFLICTED. IT MESSED ME UP, BRUH. BECAUSE AT FIRST YOU FEEL LIKE SHE DESERVES IT AFTER ALL THE SHIT SHE’S DONE TO POOR LEX.
- BUT THEN IT’S STILL KIND OF HARSH. AND ALEX DOESN’T REALIZE WHAT HE DID UNTIL HE SLAMS THE DOOR ON HER.
- HIS REGRET IS NOT HELPING.
- I’M STILL KINDA GLAD HE SAID THAT BECAUSE FOR ONCE HE’S LETTING HER KNOW THAT HE’S GETTIN’ REAL TIRED OF HER SHIT.
- Nope it’s too late. Can’t take the words back and Alex is like WHAT HAVE I DONE.
- “I’m not coming back – screw you Alex!”
- She’s hurt bad and she’s crying and Alex is feeling even worse seeing her like that and just watches her leave.
- But all I can picture is you – you in your essence. Your natural coloured hair from a few months ago, the erotic expression on your face from many nights spent alone, all of your curves, from hips to chest and even the delicate concave arc of your spine. Your spindly fingers that are adept at dealing out cards and your powers of persuasion. Your laugh in summer, and the way your tanned skin slowly fades in winter. The passion you pour into singing and the way you stretch out your vowels when you talk.
- He’s so in love with her. No matter what they’ve been through, he can’t get himself to stop these feelings because all he can see is all the things he loves about her. This paragraph was beautiful. He’s so very conflicted and I just want to give him all the hugs.
- WHO COULD DENY THESE BUTTERFLIES.
- NO MATTER WHAT, HE BELIEVES THAT JENNA’S WORTH IT. SO HE’S GONNA GO GET HER.
- IT’S GOING TO RAIN.
- RAIN IS NEVER A SIGN OF GOOD THINGS.
- UNLESS IT’S A NICHOLAS SPARKS BOOK WHERE THEY KISS AND STUFF BUT THIS ISN’T NICHOLAS SPARKS.
- He knocks on her door and he gets no answer. Oh no. Nonononononono not good. I do not sense any happiness that could come out of this.
- I DON’T MEAN TO BE A BOTHER BUT HAVE YOU SEEN THIS GIRL.
- “She’s gone.”
- HOW DID THIS KNIFE GET IN MY STOMACH. SERIOUSLY THAT LINE JUST DECIDED TO COME AND PIERCE MY BODY.
- I HAD A FEELING THIS WOULD HAPPEN BECAUSE OF THE SONG.
- THE SONG.
- THE HURTFUL SONG.
- BUT I STILL GOT BADLY STABBED.
- She bought a plane ticket that morning and omg that’s why she wanted to talk to Alex it was important but all he did was tell her off.
- EVEN WORSE. After rereading this, I realized that the last words she said to him before taking off was “Screw you, Alex.”
- PUSHING. THE KNIFE. DEEPER.
- And I bet in time, he realized that too and probably hates himself for doing that to her. He must’ve felt so awful.
- She hates flying. But she still got a ticket and left, meaning she would rather be on a plane than near him and that’s saying something.
- TWISTING. THE. KNIFE.
- AND ALEX JUST GOES HOME AND TRIES TO CALL HER. BUT NO ANSWER.
- “Jenna, please be okay.”
- THAT’S HOW THIS FIC ENDS. JENNA NEEDS TO BE OKAY. POOR ALEX IS A WRECK AND EVERYTHING IS BROKEN AND NO MY TEARS ARE FALLING.
- I’ve realized that the Hayliver gang not only hurts Hayley and Oli, but we also hurt poor Alex. Like Jacqui has hurt him with how hopelessly in love he is with Jenna, I’ve hurt him with his unresolved feelings for Meg, Shay has hurt him with multiple things, Nikko killed him off. My poor baby has been through so much.
- Rianne you’re the only one who hasn’t hurt him. YOU’RE OUR ONLY HOPE.
- ALEX NEEDS MORE HAPPY.
- NOT TO WORRY ALEX. I AM COMING WITH A BLANKET AND HOT CHOCOLATE AND COOKIES.
Well, that was my live blog of Sunday. Beautiful and painful. Once again another live blog of me documenting my pain and I suggest if you haven’t checked out the series, you check it out now because it’s amazing. There’s one more work in this series and it’s Oh, which I will definitely live blog in the near future. But for now, go and comment on Jacqui’s stuff!
Hope this was entertaining and I hope everyone’s having a good day or night!
Deuces.